O/T - Opinions re Weddings Needed Pls...

[Edwin]

This is a bit of a long story so bear with me pls...

I have been asked to be Matron of Honour for my hubby's brothers wedding. There are 3 other bridesmaids - all perfect size 10. I am not a perfect size anything - I am 14 bottom and 16/18 top with size 34JJ boobs. As you can imagine finding dresses is pretty difficult as they never fit all over and the syles I can physically fit in are limited because of my boobs.

So tonight I get a text from the bride to be saying that she has chosen the dress for us and has 'ordered' me to go on 9th May to try it on. She has had to pay to order the sample dress in to the shop and this is the only chance they can be tried on. I imagine she has ordered the dress in a size 10 as all the other BM's are that size.

The dress she likes won't suit me because I am not a perfect size 10 and have big boobs - I can not wear empire style dresses because my boobs don't fit in the bust section. I won't be able to try on the sample because I won't get it over my backside.

Am I wrong for being annoyed that she has chosen our dress w/o any consultation? I didn't do this for my BM I let her choose a dress that she liked and that suited her. I obviously expect to be told colour and the designer range but surely I should have a say in the style. I cannot wear the same things as the other girls. The bride is a perfect size 8 so just doesn't understand about not being 'perfect'.

My hubby thinks I am being unreasonable but then his family can do no wrong in his eyes.

I just want to cry because I am going to look dreadful and have low enough confidence / self esteem as it is w/o wearing something thats looks stupid on me. :cry:

I'm thinking of resigning (before I'm sacked for non-compliance!).

Just wanted some opinions before I talk to her.

Thx

 

[IreneH]

If you are matron of honour and the others are bridesmaids do you have to wear the same as them?

Irene xx

 

[Starlight]

I wouldnt do anything yet until you see the dress, could you not phone her and ask her about it and tell her your worries?

 

[Edwin]

Well that's what I thought and was one of the reasons I thought it would be ok because I could have a slightly different style dress (from same range etc) w/o looking odd. But seemingly not no. You'd think she wa sthe only person in the world ever to have got married. God I am so cross / upset over this that I don't even want my special 'treat' night curry!!!

 

[lauryloo]

I really feel for you - shes being a bit unfair on you i think If you are going to feel uncomfortable on the day i would tell her that you would rather step down or have a different style of dress.

 

[Taz]

My bridesmaids were a size 12 and a size 32. Obviously they couldn't wear the same dress so I told them the colour and they found the dresses that best suited them (pics in my album). I think you need to see the dress first and try not to stress too much about it before you do. If it's not going to work then you will have to explain to her that your shape is totally different and the dress will not look good on you which in turn would make her wedding party and the pictures look wrong. At the end of the day, she has to realise that if she makes you wear a dress that looks bad on you people will be judging her for it not you.

 

[SkinnyMoo]

If you are matron of honour and the others are bridesmaids do you have to wear the same as them?

Irene xx

Was just going to ask the same. If the style is physically not going to fit, then you shouldn't be made to wear it! I would say something to be honest! Either style that will suit your figure or you don't want to be MoH

 

[Taz]

There is no such thing as a style that won't fit. Any wedding/bridesmaid dress can be altered to fit any shape. That's not to say that every dress will suit every shape though! It has to look right and I agree, if the style is wrong you have to make it clear that if your only option is that dress then you will be stepping down