Personality affected by weight and self-esteem

[Laura Croft]

Okay this may be a controversial question but I'm procrastinating as I have a to do list which I need to get back to .

When I lacked in self-esteem, I tried harder to make friends because I couldn't believe people would like me. Of course being too nice ended up being a downfall as well.

I've been told twice in the last two days, I'm a really thoughtful person. I don't realise I'm being thoughtful, and I'm not trying to make people like me anymore. If they do, great providing I like them too, if they don't like me, well no loss to me

But I really think I had to try harder to make friends because I was uncomfortable because of the person I was inside. I constantly compared my insides to other people's outsides and lost every darn time. As a result of my lack of self-confidence, I became a nicer (and maybe better??) person.

 

[KD]

OOoh, gotta think about this one. It's very possible I reckon, but I'm sure it's more complicated than that

(It's in my nature to complicate matters to find better explanations )

Will be back to this thread I expect once I've analysed this theory on an excel sheet

 

[Laura Croft]

Oh it's definitely more complicated but thought I'd start it simple and see what happened. Look forward to hearing your thoughts though, and hope I can get the young jedi to appear at some point too. x

 

[KD]

And just to ramble a moment whilst we wait for 'young jedi' to appear, are your todo lists on excel, and do you spend so long making them look pretty with great charts for time allotted, that you haven't got time to actually do anything on the list?

Just wondered because I do that :clap:

 

[mrsessex]

I wasnt fat long enough to have the low'a'self esteem if that makes any sense lol only gained humungous amounts of weight through quitting smoking Nd before that I was 'normal'

However, did avoid going out as much when i got fat does that count ??? Going out loads more now im almost 4 stone down

So..yes it has a knock on effect doesnt it

Crap aint it lol

 

[Porgeous]

An initial and very simplistic answer would be that our experiences are what shape us and define our personalities, undoubtedly some of those experiences will be influenced by our weight and therefore yes this has to be part of what makes us who we are.

xx

 

[Laura Croft]

And just to ramble a moment whilst we wait for 'young jedi' to appear, are your todo lists on excel, and do you spend so long making them look pretty with great charts for time allotted, that you haven't got time to actually do anything on the list?

Just wondered because I do that :clap:

Err yes In fact, I started to just use my thread to do to do lists because it saved me time. Also, I just sent some information to someone and had to delete some of my graphs and stats. Just too much!

I wasnt fat long enough to have the low'a'self esteem if that makes any sense lol only gained humungous amounts of weight through quitting smoking Nd before that I was 'normal'

However, did avoid going out as much when i got fat does that count ??? Going out loads more now im almost 4 stone down

So..yes it has a knock on effect doesnt it

Crap aint it lol

It does count but not as much

An initial and very simplistic answer would be that our experiences are what shape us and define our personalities, undoubtedly some of those experiences will be influenced by our weight and therefore yes this has to be part of what makes us who we are.

xx

I don't think I'll ever be that succint.

 

[claira07]

laura you have just explained, me lol,
i am a bit worried, ive always been bigger that my mum sister friends ect and i aim to get to a size 10, im worried that when i do i wont be my normal bubbly self, and that i wont try extra hard anymore, i dont think i'll change into a selfish cold person over night, and maybe im too nice and too soft sometimes. but still i dont want to become slim and confident and change. xx
i think im being silly xxx

 

[enlightenme2]

I think I experienced quite the opposite actually. After years of snide comments, some of them even from my now DH - I have such a hard shell I don't know how to approach people... As a matter of fact I don't care, don't even make an effort to care. Gosh, does that mean that I'm gonna be a nice person? noooo I don't want that :cry: don't want to sit around making useless conversation while waiting for my children outside the school... don't want to be niice to my clients.. wah wah

 

[LizzMB]

I'm a bit quieter than i used to be when i was bigger.
the fundementals of my personallity havent changed much.

I say i'm quieter, becuase i always felt that i had to overwhelm people with my wit and humour to take the focus away from my size...
Now, i dont feel i have to do that so its calmed me down a little!
I always thought i would be a real b*tch when slim, but i'm not.
I'm a kind caring person, and that has stayed constant throughout!

I think all of lifes journeys shape us and the way we are on a daily basis.....and a weight journey is no different in my eyes!

x

 

[Laura Croft]

Really interesting stories here. I wondered if some people would go quieter.

Claira - if it is any consolation, I think I have a really nice balance now. I'm good at looking after myself but not desperate to people please.