Please help me :-(

Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by JestersTear, 8 June 2009 Social URL.

  1. JestersTear

    JestersTear Cute, but psycho!

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    Please help me...I feel like I've lost all motivation to stick to my plan.
    Over the last few weeks, I've gradually been having takeaways, ice creams and generally naughty things. Although during the day I generally stick to plan, these naughties keep cropping in and I feel incapable of resisting - I feel weak, pathetic and have lost all my will power.

    When I started SW, my goal was to lose weight so that I could fit into chairs with arms - ie: not have to worry when we go out...well, I've reached that and now it's a struggle just to get my 3.5 stone award...I've been hovering round it for about 2 months now, which is stupid but yet I seem unable to get a grip.
    Help me :cry:
     
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  3. metrognome

    metrognome is getting better at it

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    hello, im in the same boat as you cant seem to find the will power to say no to things.

    maybe if you set yourself another goal then you maybe able to refocus and get back on track,
    think of how you felt before you started sw do you really want to go back to that feeling again
     
  4. red1983

    red1983 Full Member

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    Hey Jess,

    I really do know how you feel - i have been doing exactly the same - letting things slowly creep back in over the last few weeks - each day saying thats the last treat i will get back to plan tomorrow.

    I have decided that i'm writing it all down again now - have got my little notebook out again and i am logging all my foods - i have also planned out this weeks food - including lunches and bought the stuff so i'm not tempted to have anything else..

    Believe me i know how you feel - but remember what you have achieved 3.5 stone is fantastic!!! Berries have been my saving gace this weekend - frozen and in with yogs - they are also a speed food..

    Honestly you are doing so fantastically - keep positive!!

    K xxx
     
  5. Eternalflame

    Eternalflame Excited about the new me!

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    I think you should look at your loss and decide if you want to put it back on.. or loose more? Obviously you want to loose more..but that must be your Jiminey Cricket, everytime you think about slipping, keep thinking of what you will do.. I'm on the CD plan and my losses aren't as good as everyone elses, but if I think about slipping, I reiterate why I started it in the begining. Speaking to yourself, lol.. does help.xx
     
  6. Sticky

    Sticky I will succeed!!!

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    Hi Jester -

    First of all - don't lose site of the fact you've lost over 3 stone - that's amazing!

    All I can suggest is to 're-boot' - have a think why you're doing this and remind yourself of how good it feels to see the scales go down.

    If you've reached your goal, set another one - but a small goal. Looking at the whole loss in one chunk scares me so I set weekly mini goals.

    Why not look to dropping a dress size as your new goal?

    Stay happy sweetie - you're doing SO WELL!

    xxx
     
  7. JestersTear

    JestersTear Cute, but psycho!

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    I've been thinking that I need to 'reboot' as you out it lol but I'm really not sure how to do it.
    My dad has always said that I'd give up, sooner or later, and although I don't want to do so, I fear he might be right as this has happened before...*sigh*
     
  8. charlottegrace1

    charlottegrace1 Gold Member

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    BIG HUG BEING SENT TO YOU

    Its horrid when this happens but you have had a fantastic weight loss so far so don't loose sight of that fact. Try and remember how you felt when you got on the scales and had a loss that week, did it feel fantastic? I bet it did, so ask yourself why you were focused then and what has changed. I read somewhere that when people diet, it takes 3 weeks to get into the new way of eating and by 12 weeks everyone struggles and thats when it becomes easy to fall off the waggon or give up. Try setting a new goal for yourself, say when you have lost the next 7lbs you are going to treat yourself to something you want eg new lippy or handbag or something for the house, but make sure its something you REALY want to make the effort worth it. Take each day at a time and write everthing down. If there is temptation in your way with meals out etc. If its not planned so you can cater for your food needs for the day, my advice would be don't go! Im not a party pooper but what do you want more. There will ALWAYS be temptation in your way whether you are overweight or slim, the secret is to be strong and not give in to something you don't want. No body will be offended and if they keep on at you to go or trying to push food on you, a good reply is that you cann't have it for medical reasons, that usually shuts em up.
    Keep a food diary, regroup the focus brain cells and don't be hard on yourself.
    Go for it girl today is a new day! XX
     
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  9. metrognome

    metrognome is getting better at it

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    no dont give him the satisfaction of saying i told you so!!!!
    do you want to buddy up maybe we can help each other
     
  10. sanicholl

    sanicholl Silver Member

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    Hey Hun I totally agree with Charlottegrace. You have done so well hun don't give up now. We all have bad days (I usually turn 1 day into a week) but you need to draw a line under it, pick yourself up mentally and say I CAN do this. Ignore what your dad has to say - prove him wrong. If you fancy something sweet have it, I keep the little bars of aero in the fridge and have one of them they are only 3 syns or a minimilk instead of a magnum (It doesn't quite hit the same spot but i am still having something nice)! Just keep thinking how good you will feel when you reach target sweetie. In the meantime Heres a BIG HUG. Keep going you are great. xx
     
  11. snorklebuddy

    snorklebuddy Member

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    Hi

    I have a look at photos of me 51lbs ago and that is enough to kick me back into shape. i also go through my old magazines and books and plan some meals. It is very hard to remain motivated for a long time but just remember how good it feels to see and feel it coming off.
     
  12. Sarah-Jayne

    Sarah-Jayne Gold Member

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    In my opinion hun, thats not very nice of your dad to say that he knew you would give up sooner or later, prove him wrong, show him that you can do this.

    You have done so well so far, please dont stop. So you have had the odd treat here and there, no real problem, you havnt put your 3.5 stone loss back on so thats an achievement in its own.

    Keep with it mate x
     
  13. Sarah-Jayne

    Sarah-Jayne Gold Member

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    same here, i done that only the other day actually!
     
  14. Chuffy_29

    Chuffy_29 Bring it on!

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    Deffo write things down i do it all the time. It makes me think before i pop anything in i shouldn't, like seeing it in black and white will put a stop to it, and i write down when i go astray so i can think why it happened and how i can cope with that. My Dad was always down on me about my weight so i know how demoralising it is. How about setting yourself a small goal maybe just two or three pounds, and saying for just one week i'll do 100% and then when achieve that goal (which i'm sure you will) it might pep you up? You could post on here everyday and everyone will keep giving you advice and positive help. I don't mind being your diet buddy (or a whinge board) if you'd like?
     
  15. Donnie46

    Donnie46 Slow but sure....

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    Look at your past photo's and remember you have done remarkably well so far 3stones gone, thats great, well done to you, ask yourself do I really want to go back to how I was? Do I want to be breathless and wear baggy clothes again?

    Draw a line under your 'blip' now and try to get back on track, we are all behind you and will help all we can, you have come to far to throw in the towel now, good luck to you, You Can Do It!!!!
     
  16. JestersTear

    JestersTear Cute, but psycho!

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    Yeah, it didn't feel supportive when he said it - but he has a point as I've been on diets before and have always given up in the past. He's just expecting me to do it again, based on previous experience, I guess.
     
  17. JestersTear

    JestersTear Cute, but psycho!

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    I can't see that I look any different from my before photos to now though :(
     
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  19. JestersTear

    JestersTear Cute, but psycho!

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    Thanks everyone for the help and advice so far xx

    I'm thinking of starting a diary in here for people to comment back to me on how Ive felt and what I've done in the day...do you think that might help?
     
  20. Harrie

    Harrie Silver Member

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    I understand exactly how your dad is making you feel. Once somebody says "you'll never manage it", it puts that little seed of doubt into your mind and you start working towards never managing it.

    Well, after reading several of your posts over the last few months, I can hand on heart say you WILL manage it. You're already doing it! You've lost over three stones - how bloody fantastic, wonderful, amazing is that? :happy096:You should be waving a flag saying "I'm incredible" rather than sighing over what someone else says (and I know he's your dad, but he isn't you and only you have control over your life).

    Tell us how it feels to have achieved your goal? To be able to sit in those seats like you'd always wanted? I bet it feels wonderful. So you've had a bit of a slideback - who hasn't? That certainly doesn't mean you're "weak" or "pathetic". Weak and pathetic people don't reach goal. And losing 47lbs shows you have bucketloads of willpower, so don't give us any of that "I have none" ;).

    Some people have easy paths to goal (jammy beggars :p), others of us have bumpy rides. Just because you've hit a few doesn't mean you've abandoned the journey. Get the bulldozer out and bash those bumps out of the way.

    Congratulate yourself on what you've done. How much you've achieved. You're a whole new you and so deserve a whole new way of thinking. And you know fine well - YOU CAN DO IT :superwoman:

    xx
     
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  21. sanicholl

    sanicholl Silver Member

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    Harrie is totally right sweetie! You CAN do this and we will help you all the way. xxxx
     
  22. HellieCopter

    HellieCopter Gold Member

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    That's a great post from Harrie! :D

    Surely you must see a difference in photos of yourself before losing 3 stone?! I bet you we could if you post them here...

    It's funny how we delude ourselves sometimes - we don't see what's really there (or not there, in our cases!). I was looking through old photos of myself with a friend at the weekend, digging out pics for another friend's hen book. I couldn't actually enjoy looking at the photos because I was so huge. I didn't enjoy it one bit! All I could think was how awful I looked, how could I let myself get like that?! You know?!

    It's not fair of your dad to say that about you giving up eventually - what a horrid thing to say!!! :( Look at yourself now. Take your measurements, see how different your clothes fit now. You're a SUCCESS! :D

    You WILL get back in the zone. Perhaps you need to just maintain for a little while, rather than focus on losing?

    You've done SO well. Concentrate on your success, think of the positives!
     
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