What have been your worst cooking disaster's?

Donnie46

Donnie46

Slow but sure....
Reading Charlotte's Mr Warburton thread below about her disater with baking some bread.......reminded me of some fruit rock cakes I made when I was first married, my in-laws were coming to Sunday tea and my MIL was a first class cook and baker - well my rock cakes were just that...like rocks, they would have made brilliant door stops, luckily MIL bought a beautiful iced Victoria sponge with her so we did have some cake for tea, needless to say my rock cakes were well hidden out of sight in the bin....if I had given them to the birds they would never have been able to fly off again, LOL.....


So I got to thinking what has been your worst cooking disaster?
 
Attempted a SW style fish pie once which involved quark and white wine vinegar. Other half NOT pleased. Curdling occured. Not nice. Now it's all he ever talks about when people ask about my cooking. He fails to mention the other 3 meals a day, every day for the last however many years which have all been DELICIOUS. g*t.
 
i did a potato and brocoli and quark bake thingy which was in the calendar i think or the magazine at xmas and was horrid
 
Mine was at work in my first week ( i'm the cook in a primary school) we were really short staffed - as usual- and i was rushing to get the rice on as i was way behind. I ran into the cupboard opened the tin which said " long grain rice" on the lid and grabbed 2 bags threw then in the pan and went away to do other stuff. About 20 mins later i thought better go get the rice off ,grabbed pan and took lid off and it looked really really over cooked, I thought god it looks like bl**dy pudding rice it's so over done and it wasn't on that long. So i drained it and thats when i realised it WAS pudding rice, someone had put the bags in the wrong tin and they were the same colour and size as the long grain, i hadn't looked properly coz of rushing!!
The worst thing was it was too late to get another pan of water on etc so the poor kids had to have pudding rice with their chicken fricasse !! Surprisingly only 1 or 2 said the rice was weird!! lol
 
The first time I ever made bread you could have built an extension with it!
 
I made pork and apple plait whilst still at school - this was the recepie that we were to follow so there was no element of choise. I took it home and my family attempted to eat it and all pronoced it disgusting.

I left school a long time ago and now happily cater for my family of 5 with no major complaints but my parents and sister will always hark back to this disaster when talking about my cooking!
 
hahahhahaha I just tried to make Britmum's cous cous cake and forgot the vital step of making up the cous cous first and when i baked it, it went mould green and was all bitty and gritty.

FAIL!
 
My husband used to refer to my rock cakes as "sand dunes" because the first couple of times I made them the mixture was too wet and they spread too far. And I once made a swiss roll which had all the texture of a face flannel!

No-one ever lets you forget your failures!!!
 
I remember reading an article years ago in the Guardian by a cookery writer about the importance of making every step in a recipe crystal clear.

She had received a letter from a reader berating her for not mentioning that when making Scotch Eggs she should shell the hard-boiled eggs before wrapping the sausage meat around them!

It still makes me giggle at the thought of the looks on her family's faces when they bit into them!!!!
 
Hahahaha!!!! These are great!

Im given strict instructions not to cook pizzas as I always make them go black, even now! Although my SW one comes out beautifully!!
Also, I once made the SW meat loaf...that was just disgusting!
 
Cheesecake :(.. it was my birthday, and we spent all day going back and forth to morrisons to get the right ingrediants to make it, i dont like cake and always ahve cheesecake instead, BUT as i was on sw, we decided to do a sw friendly one. quite frankly, the quark was disgusting, the buiscuit base was so thin i felt cheated, and the gelatine went all minging! argh, it was disgusting!!!!!


Still scarred :( x
 
oooooow I remember it well, and apart from yesturdays bread disaster, I was 18 and it was my first Christmas as a new wife and practicing cookery goddess (still not achieved that status after all this time of trying). It was the week before Christmas and we would all take lovely things into work to eat at teabreak, so I thought mince pies would be a good idea. So about 8 o'clock in the evening I set about doing the baking. At around 9.30 I was in floods of tears to my mum (who was a fantastic pastry cook) bawling my eyes out about how rock hard my pies were and how useless I was. The mince meat had all oozed out of them and stuck them to the tin so in trying to get them out with a crowbar, they had all broken up, and the pastry had burned cos I had put sugar on before cooking. You really could have used them as cannons. At 11 o'clock that night, who should walk through the door but my mum with a huge tin of lovely still warm mince pies for me to take to work the next day. So I started crying again but this time with joy and love for my mum, who had made them without being asked, and made a sepecial trip to bring them round for me. What special people mums are, so giving of their time and themselves. and so much taken for granted sometimes. Thanks mum xx

ps, Yes I did pass them off as my own at work lol. Duck, here comes the nose growing lol.
 
Charlottegrace,what a lovely lovely post. Made me feel all warm inside, how lovely of your mum.

As for my cooking disasters.... I don't have them!! I blame all errors on my oven, it's rubbish.
 
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