• Upgrades have been completed! Including conversations, 😁😎🏀⚾⚽ Emojis and more.. Read more

Why do I never listen to advice?!

Last August I went to see my Docs with a bad back. He gave me pain killers and told me that I really need to lose weight as I topped the scales at 27 stone. I told him I was doing Slimming World and was gonna to succeed this time.

Roll onto this week and I have back ache again, this time it is worse that last. He has given me stronger pain killers, and a sedative to help me sleep at night. He was nice and didn't say, "Told you so" for not listening to his advice of lose weight or it will come back again. But instead we had a little discussion of why I failed etc. It was nice to get someone opinion on the subject.

I feel so stupid not to listen to my own body and not do something about my weight. Everything hurts all of the time! Feet, ankles, knees and lower back. And now this extra back ache nearer the middle of the spine.

If I had listened last August I could be 5 stone lighter, not 2 stone heavier!

I love watching the biggest loser programs and I always identify with some of those that are on it. And love to see them grow and deal with their problems, and it's great to see them at the finale and how much they have changed. But why can't I ever get round to doing it for me?!
Get Rid of this ad and join in on the conversation for free today! Tap here!


loving being a loser
you will get there... dont beat yourself up... let go of any blip or hostility towards yourself as that may cause you to comfort eat... i have just managed to pull my head into losing weight and have found i am trying to convince other people that i dont want to go out for dinner or have a take away i would rather do something physical like bowling or swimming!! try get your head in the zone... and keep yourself busy so you dont reach for food as a clutch or because you are bored ... all the best and good luck :)


Silver Member
Dont beat yourself up over it! I dont know about anyone else but im pretty much in the same boat as you, i hurt when i walk i hurt when im sitting down too long, infact i hurt most of the time purly because of my 'extra' weight.
I just started Slimming World again and am in week 2...Lets stay strong and possitive WE SHALL BEAT THE BULGE THIS TIME! good luck x
Do you go to class?

What is it that makes you want to eat non SW friendly food, can you see a pattern. Is it at the weekend after a drink?

Once you find a pattern we can offer help in how you change things.

Take a look at the diaries & see what yummy food you can eat.

Also print off this thread & keep it to hand somewhere to keep you motivated.
Hi there

As everyone has said... don't give yourself a hard time, you can't change what has been done - BUT you can change what you do from now on :vibes:
I have been burying my head in the sand for years -not helped by the fact that to say how much weight I was carrying I got off pretty lightly (no pun intended :p) - I never really got achy puffy ankles, high blood pressure etc.. how the heck my body has coped with what I put it through I will never know...
However I have finally got to grips with it, and as you will see from all the lovely folks on here... it can be done..

Perhaps now is Your time :D - and Im sure you will get all the help you need on here ..
I would suggest you do a little planning to make life easier and to make sure you get meals that you really really enjoy and then just take it one day or even one meal at a time...

I have loads of recipes I have adapted if you are stuck for ideas and then there are all the recipes and people on here you can access...
best of luck and YOU CAN DO THIS -


Silver Member
I've been there too. Many warnings over the years, both physical and emotional plus verbal from doctors etc...

I think like with any "addiction" (i.e. using food for a reason other than hunger) you have to hit a bottom. Everyone's has a different level where they say "enough is enough". It seems you're getting to that point now because of the physical consequences of over eating. I did too a couple of months back and I'm glad really that it became too physically uncomfortable to continue eating because I wouldn't be 2 and a half stone lighter now if it hadn't.

I started slimming world nearly 22 months ago and lasted about 3 months before giving up. I lost 2 stone + last time and then gained 4+ stone before I began again this Jan. Don't beat yourself up about it, you can't change the past, only the future. Once you take a hold of it and start to do something about it, you'll instantly feel better about yourself and have a more positive outlook on things.

Try not to look at the bigger picture of ALL the weight you need to lose, just set yourself little goals to aim for and if you have a blip then get back on track asap. Good luck!
I would say the pattern is boredom, but i'm never normally what you would class as being bored! Always have things to do. Mindless eating and a want to eat. I know that there is junk food in the house, along with lots of fruit and yoghurt. I want a cuppa and caramel squares. I'm not hungry or anything, but thats what i want.

I always think enough is enough, this is may time. I last for a month and then cave. I've had enough of failing, but also had enough of being super morbidly obese. I'm stuck in a circle within my mind which also reflects eating habits.


Silver Member
Do you go to class? These are things a good consultant will help you address head one ♥
Mr Gilbo, thanks for such great honesty. Come back to sw, IMHO doing something about this will make you feel better. You can be in control again!!
Let the past be past. New life starts now
Hi Mr Gilbo, Well I can honestly say I know exactly how you feel!!
I have a very bad back and am in pain to some degree or another every day as I have ankolysing spondilosis of the spine and I am on quite strong painkillers too.
My weight got to 16st2lb last year and at 5' tall - that's a lot of pressure to put on a decrepid spine. Now having lost just on 2st am feeling so much better altho' I know I am never going to get to being pain free.
I have found that logging on here and trying to help others and just supporting people has been a godsend and kept my fingers from wandering to the biscuit tin!!

Hope you get started in earnest this time and don't worry about the blips - we all have them from time to time. Main thing is to get back to it a.s.a.p.

All the very best to you...:)
I would say the pattern is boredom, but i'm never normally what you would class as being bored! Always have things to do. Mindless eating and a want to eat. I know that there is junk food in the house, along with lots of fruit and yoghurt. I want a cuppa and caramel squares. I'm not hungry or anything, but thats what i want.
Are there things you could do with your hands, which if you were eating you wouldn't be able to do. I know this won't apply to you but, I love to knit & make cards & eating would just get in the way. You need to find a habit which you can do with your hands that will stop you eating, I can't think of an idea but hopefully somebody will.

Check out the recipes on here I'm sure you'll find something you could use with your cuppa instead of caramel squares. Bin the junk food if you can, if not write on each item how many syns are in a potion. That way if you do eat some you can keep track of how many syns per day you are eating.

Fruit & yogurt doesn't suit everyone, either buy fruit you know you will eat or have some other snack foods, eg boiled eggs, tomatoes, boiled potatoes. I like sugar puffs without milk as a snack, you can have 28grms with a ryvita as a hexb.
You have my sympathies as I was exactly the same. You say that you last for a month before caving so:
1. do you lose a lot of weight during that month of sticking to plan or have you been disappointed by your results? If you are seeing good losses does that not inspire you to stick to it?
2. You say you cave, so does that mean you have one bad day and think sod it, ruined it again and then launch into self destruct mode? Everyone is allowed a bad day, the key is to draw a line under it and get straight back on plan.

It's really tough though, your head has to be in the right place to tackle your problem and I would truly say that if you're not quite there mentally there's not much point doing it as you'll just stay in the binge mentality and probably end up putting more weight on! This site is a great source of support if you want it, I think it's helped me no end to keep focused and learn new things about the plan. Good luck, I hope you manage to find the trigger that will help you stick to it and succeed x
If I cave I can't seem to draw a line under it and start back on it. I have to wait until the next weigh in.

Thanks for you help guys and your suggestions.
Mr Gilbo,
I can really hear the sadness in your posts...please give sw another go. I don't know if u have ever tried the extra easy plan but it really is so simple to do. I was very sceptical at first...lost lots of weight on various occasions on red and green days but put it on again. I'm an 'emotional' eater rather than a 'boredom' eater, and have never recovered from my dads diagnosis of cancer, and the loss of my beloved auntie and nan recently. I have gained 5 stones in 4 yrs. My back hurts, my knees feel like they have hot pokers being jabbed through them, I'm v breathless, and I can't sleep at night...I'm only 44. I was a little embarrassed to rejoin sw after Xmas as I'd started and stopped again lots of times, but the welcome I received was second to none...it was like coming home. I was scared to try ee as I knew red and green days worked, but curiosity got the better of me and now I do ee most days and have lost 1st 10lbs in 9 wks. I am thrilled with that...not amazingly fast by some diets standards but then I don't feel like I'm on a diet. I still have around 4st to lose so a long way to go yet, but the important thing is to make a start.
You know u want to lose weight...you've already got the right mind set, now you have to apply yourself and go for it.
I don't know if you have already joined a group, but if you haven't yet then maybe start looking into it? I don't know about u but I need the discipline of having to be officially weighed each week to keep me on track, and I love the support I receive there. This site is amazing too...I feel I have so many friends here and I only joined a couple of months ago.
Anyway, I wish you all the luck in the world with your journey back to good health. There's loads of help, support and advice on here if u need it x

Sent from my HTC Wildfire using MiniMins


loves a curlywurly
hiya hun.. first u need to stop beating yourself up and forget about what u could have lost if you'd started in august. let this be your new start :) this is your time to change things. i suffer with my back too so i know about the pain and how depressing it can be. swimming is great and over time will strengthen your back! good luck with your weight loss journey :)
Hi mate!

From one bloke to another, i feel your pain and share your frustration. I also sense your "cry for help".

Funny you mentioned last August and 5 stone loss. I have now lost 5st 7lb since 1st August last year (3 st 4lb on SW) - like a lot of things, you need a catalyst, a focus, a warning, a kick up the a*rse, call it what you will.

Yours is extreme backpain, mine was standing in floods at the cremation of my best mate having travelled 200 mile to send him off. I decided to choose life!

You will do it, when you're ready and once that juggernaut starts rolling, it will be unstoppable! I know that sounds like a cliché but it is true. Just need to get your head around the plan and make a few life changes and "get in the zone".

If you don't go to class,I strongly recommend you do so and join a local group. It will be daunting at first, but I guarantee you will be made welcome and become a minor celebrity within the group:D

Have a good clean out of your cupboards and replace your choccies, cake, caramel stuff with healthy stuff, fruit, veg, hifi bars. Removing temptation at first, then gradually re-introduce them. (remember you can add them as syns)

Anyway, get planning, keep diaries and post on here. The support is all around, and best of all it is free.

Feel free to PM at any time for any queries or advise/help should you need it, or just post on site.

All the best to you!

I rejoined slimming world on Thursday night and start afresh today. Unfortunately wasn't practical due to work conference and then a friends birthday. So today is the day.

Also off to the gym in a short while, and swimming once a week with a friend. She is dragging me to that! Hope she doesn't want to spend too much time in the sauna and steam room gossiping!

Well done you for going back - I have recently rejoined and I was a little unsure but I am so glad I did! Good luck on plan and there is nothing wrong with a good old gossip...surely it must burn some cals hehe xxxx


Silver Member
just here to say well done for rejoining and to wish you lots of strength and determination to get to where you want to be. if your head and heart are in it then the rest will follow. for some people it takes a long time, took me 15 years to accept i needed to lose it for good, but once i bit the bullet there is most definitly no looking back. i know you can do it too. enjoy your journey too, its a new lifestyle :)
Well done on going back. One day at a time.

Similar threads