2 day binge on junk.....cry

Discussion in 'Calorie Counting' started by pumpkin2008, 25 July 2009 Social URL.

  1. pumpkin2008

    pumpkin2008 Full Member

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    Well I'm coming to the end of my second day of binging on junk food, feeling sick and depressed. I can only seem to stick to my calorie allowance for 3days then I go over and end up binging for a day or 2 and undo-ing all my hard work.
    Sorry to come on and moan, just no-one else to talk to and feeling really depressed about it. Am so fed up with my weight and myself in general, I can't bare to look in the mirror. Am going on hoilday with lots of skinny girls in a few weeks, and I'm the only fat one, I promised I'd have at least 2 st lost for it and I havn't lost a lb and only 6 weeks to go, I really feel like pulling out as I don't wana go and feel embarrassed and covered up on a clubbin holiday. I can see it now, me sittin in the nite-club like a fat loner in old mumsy rare clothes as nothing trendy fits me or looks anyway decent. I need help :cry:
     
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  3. vickydink

    vickydink Determined!!

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    Awww just try keep at it, keep picturing how good it will be when you have even lost a fraction of the weight u have lost.
    Other diets i have one before now i have ended up giving up a few motnhs in but on calorie counting here i am 7 months later still going. Getting through allt he hard parts, the last 3 weeks i have lost nothing but i really am determined to get to that goal.

    I really dont think you should give up and DEFINATLY go for that holiday! :) If anything it will help you with your diet really. Also if your finding you are eating crap, try eating it in smaller quantities so your sticking to your cals maybe so then you dont feel so deprived?
     
  4. XlosingitX

    XlosingitX Gold Member

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    is it possible you could do cd b4 your holidays ? that would be a faster loss your looking for ..

    dont be sad life is short hunny xxxx
     
  5. The Rose

    The Rose Rosie

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    Hi Pumpkin

    Please don't be upset about this and certainly don't let it ruin your holiday. If they are your friends they care and love you for yourself and not how big or small you are.

    It may be that you are being too strict with your calorie counting or even not allowing yourself treats. How do you calorie count. I use essential weightloss resources co uk and I always allow myself treats every day, that way I don't really feel that need to binge or go mad.

    Iris is the best person to speak to on the forum about calorie counting because she has done absolutely fantastically - maybe you could PM her. I am sure she will give you some fantastic advice.

    Rosie xx
     
  6. pumpkin2008

    pumpkin2008 Full Member

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    Thanks for all the replys. I do allow myself treats in my calorie allowance, I usually have a caramel freddo and a cappuccino daily so I'm using 180 cals on my treat and sticking to 1500-1600 calories a day.
    CD is definatly a no go for me, I lost 2st with LL (the LLC let me join when my BMI was below whatever it needed to be and only had 2 to lose), and as soon as I started eating again I developed BED where I'd be really good then really bad, or on packs and of them. I left it for a few months then tried again and then I developed depression and I was nearly admitted to hospital, was thinking suicide was the only answer until I started exercising at the beginning of this year. I know my body shape has changed, but I havn't lost any weigh, I keep going up and down by 6-7lb.
    I'm just back from spin class and am feeling more possitive, I just can't stop myself going into binge mode once I go over my calorie allowance, I need to get rid of my all or nothing attitude but I just don't know how :confused:
    You guys are right though about the holiday, I just need to be more positive and make sure I have a good time.
    Glad I got up early for spin, I think if I hadn't I would prob end up eating junk feeling sorry for myself again. Sorry for the rant, am defo feeling alot better and more possitive so thanks for all your help guys xxx
     
  7. rhuba

    rhuba i really don't know life

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    Sometimes it's reeeaaally hard to bring yourself back from a binge sesh. it's one of those things where you think 'sod it, i've buggered it up now, so might as well continue!' it's one of the most ridiculous things to do once you've broken the diet slightly. how could hundreds, perhaps thousands of extra cals possibly be a good idea after you've only slipped up by a couple of hundred? i don't know. but i do know i've been there (this weekend, in fact!) i get a feeling of slight hopelessness, as if i can't control what goes into my mouth in one day, what hope do i have for the rest of my life, never mind my diet? These are emotional issues that need to be overcome as we experience them.

    first step is acknowledging that you're having a binge. knowing that you can stop eating at any time, and reduce the potential effect the binge will have on your diet. that is all well and good. what is difficult is the actual stopping. my binges seem to be few and far between, but i have very little self control once they have started.

    don't really know what point this post has, as i'm not offering much advice but i want you to know that youre not alone. i think doing a bit of research and writing down feelings that you're having if you feel a binge coming on might be useful - it might help identify what triggers them, and then you can start to address those issues, rather than beating yourself up about it.

    with regards the holiday: go, and have fun m'dear. don't worry that you've not reached your target. look at the bigger picture: is the holiday the end of your diet? nope. if you were nearer your goal, it may have been a time that would have seen you fall of the wagon. look forward to the future. a years time, perhaps. i've stopped setting myself goals: i want to get to my goal, but i'm going about it a little differently. no time restraints (within reason: i dont want it to take 20years!!!) but i'm not going to beat myself up if i dont lose every week. trying to change my mindset and my emotional reactions to food. i figure if it takes longer, then i'm better set up for maintenance as i'll be more in the swing of things a few months down the line.

    hopefully my ramble has helped a bit, i think it was more self-healing than anything, but your post just struck a chord. if you need any more chats from someone who knows where you're coming from just keep posting hun!! :)
     
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  8. Lisamac30

    Lisamac30 Full Member

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    Hi There,

    I'm sure i'm not the only other person on here to know exactly how you must be feeling.

    My advice is to make small changes that really will make a difference. I've tried sticking to diet's in the past and i've ended up in exactly the same situation as you, I just can't do it for some reason!! But now I have accepted it's a life change thats needed rather than another fad diet, and I have made small changes. I will only eat fruit or oat cakes (as they are not that nice so I'll only eat a couple lol) in between meals IF i'm hungry. I've reduced my portion sizes slightly, and i'm walking EVERYWHERE!!

    Ok, it may not be a fast loss, but it's healthy, and i'm also able to stick to it getting a better overall result, instead of failing after a short period of time...i'm hoping to be at my goal by June next year.

    Even if you don't lose the 2 stone by the time of your holiday, you can still lose some, and maybe that'd help you to feel a bit better?

    I've always been the biggest girl in my circle of friends, and sometimes it does get you down. But I do try and make the best of myself, if I were you i'd go and buy a really nice flattering cossie (i've just got a nice holter neck tankini from sainsbury's) have my hair and nails done and an all over body wax, get some big earings and bangles and go and have a bloody good holiday!!

    Take care,
     
  9. Iris

    Iris Full Member

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    Some lovely posts in this thread, and great advice... I think we've all been there, pumpkin. One thing I'd say is that guilt and self-criticism are both totally futile and won't help. And besides that, it is NOT your fault. Sounds to me that the mindset and behaviours promoted by the dieting industry and their programmes have a big part to play in your own personal food demons. They've taken your money, yanked you around, encouraged you to think short term, encouraged you to basically starve, then sat back waiting for your body to do the only natural thing - eat to excess in the face of 'famine,' so you'd have to go back and buy more of their ridiculous products.

    To me, that's criminal. The kind of misery these companies promote all in pursuit of cash is just disgusting.

    But you've come out the other side and you're on your own two feet now and controlling what happens to you. The big step in that is finding a sustainable way of eating that satisfies you and puts the binging demons to sleep once and for all. That is tough, though, it's tough for anyone who's ever been yanked around by the yo-yo, because your body and mind have come to dread the whole 'dieting' thing as it's always been equated with unpleasant starvation and negativity. It's not your fault at all that your body still has the odd panic attack where it feels it has to reach out and eat loads to stave off approaching famine. I think that's why it's so important to just ditch the dieting mindset once and for all and know that this time you're embracing a lifestyle that is good for you and will nourish you properly for the rest of your life.

    I used to binge a lot, too. In my chocoholic days that was anything up to 50 bars, or several kilos, of chocolate. I still have days where I eat to excess, but the only difference now is that I do it mostly with relatively 'safe' foods like fruit and veg and jelly. Keeping well stocked up on these can be a lifeline in moments of weakness. Give yourself that permission to satisfy your hunger whenever it strikes with good foods. Have several portions of fruit, a healthy sandwich, a big mug of Options hot choc and a couple of cereal bars. You can have the comfort of food when you really need it, but making healthier choices will get you into good patterns of behaviour, and you'll hopefully find these little splurges more satisfying than just sitting down with a pack of biccies, which never seem to hit the spot however many you eat!

    I know from my own binges that it's not all emotional. I think there's a big physical component. If you slow yourself down a bit when you feel the urge to binge strike, you'll notice how your whole body tenses up like it's preparing for a fight. Your gut clenches, your muscles spasm, your breathing is a lot more shallow, and you find it tough to focus on anything other than getting your hit of food, and doing it as quickly as possible. I know it sounds daft, but if you can just try taking one moment and trying to get your body to relax, taking some deep breaths, having a time-out, and getting away from that feeling of tense desperation, it can maybe help with breaking the cycle. The next time you really want to binge, maybe try making yourself a steaming mug of Highlights/Options hot choc and taking it with you to a quiet corner and curling up, sipping it, letting everything unclench, closing your eyes for a while and letting the heat and choccy flavour relax you. If you add a little pinch of cayenne pepper and one of cinnamon to your hot chocolate, I find it gives you a great warming, relaxing heat and makes it very satisfying. If you're still hungry after that, have a healthy snack or three. You can, you're allowed to, it's not wrong or bad!!

    As for being surrounded by the skinnies on holiday - oh heck, do I know what you're talking about there. I spent all my teenage years being the big girl. 5'10" and built like an oak tree, and my best mates were all size 6/8. I will say something, though, looking at your stats I bet you carry whatever weight you have far better than you feel you do at your height. People used to tell me that and I thought it was a platitude, but it's true that with a bit of height you can rock it pretty darn well - and I think it's all to do with the attitude you bring to it. The irony, too, is that I've yet to meet the man who truly preferred a size 8 to a curvy 16. I bet you have some banging curves, and while you're losing weight, I think you should make the most of them! I know it's tough to fake confidence you don't feel, but if you just make a vow one evening to doll yourself up and wear something eye-popping and curve-enhancing, get out there and act confidently and happily, you may be surprised just how much of a magnet it makes you to other people. It's all that counts at the end of the day - it's not about your size or shape, it's about your mindset and your confidence. There's nothing more attractive in a man or a woman than someone who looks happy with themselves. Got to fake that until you make it, I guess! Look on it as practice for how you'll act when you get to your target. If you can start giving yourself some of the love and respect you deserve right now, it does take off some of the pressure - and you have a right to enjoy yourself and enjoy life right now, it shouldn't be dependent on something as relatively tiny as your weight!

    Please don't feel down - you *will* get where you want to be. Ignore the inner punishing demons and give yourself some credit for all the good days and positive things you do, and everything you have to offer. You deserve that!
     
    yo-yo-dieter and rhuba like this.
  10. rhuba

    rhuba i really don't know life

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    iris, you are amazing. i can't think of any other way to put it. i like to think of myself as pretty level headed and a good advice giver most of the time, but you are soemthing else. thank you!
     
  11. pumpkin2008

    pumpkin2008 Full Member

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    Rhuba i 2nd that!!
    Iris I think you should open a slimming club for counting cals, or be a counseller or some sort. you'd be fab. I would defo come to you lol!
    thanks to everyone for their kind words and pearls of wisdom, it's nice to know you're not alone when you truely feel like it.
    You guys are ace, thanks xxx
     
  12. Iris

    Iris Full Member

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    And Iris goes beet red again! Thank you both kindly... just hope some of the waffle is in some way useful. I think I've just made so many blunders in my life and had so many ups and downs that it's made me analyse it all (maybe too deeply).

    I'd love to be a counsellor, but I'm the shy sort in person and I tend to mumble! A slimming club would be wonderful, though, but it'd probably just consist of a lot of group hugs and hot chocolate sipping, and I'd never have the heart to profit out of it. Tree-hugging hippies never make good businesswomen, I suppose! :p
     
  13. pumpkin2008

    pumpkin2008 Full Member

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    Lmao Iris!x
     
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