Accountability is key!!

Day 139
Weigh in eve feeling nervous but not at all as I have stuck to it and it’s the speculation if it’s anything loss. I am happy either way and think I am due a stay the same so thinking that will be the case. I do this every week I know it’s ridiculous 😂 so whatever it is as long as it’s not a gain(and if it is it’s not the end of the world) all will be revealed tomorrow.
 
Day 141
Bit of a late entry but my youngest has a sickness bug (again!) poor lad so last night was a bit pre occupied. Good day apart from that and back to work and thankfully didn’t come back to any disasters which was a relief.
 
Poor wee mite. I hope you are feeling Ok today.
 
Thank you @AliGal and @purpleorc he seemed to rally a little bit this afternoon he had a good tantrum post nap and wanted something but didn’t know what he wanted but think it was mainly he felt a bit rubbish and doesn’t understand why. He is in the throes of the 2’s which provides its own challenges like any 2 year old but when a big intervenes you can’t help but feel awful for them as they don’t understand fully why they feel ill and you can’t help. Hoping he gets a good sleep tonight and is a new boy tomorrow!
 
Day 142
A correct day diary entry now(!) and as mentioned hoping my youngest is on the mend poor baba.
It’s been a good day Exante wise was on top of my water and had drank the first litre by 9.30am and also had two cinnamon swirl shakes as nearly at the end of the delivery and about to start on another after tomorrow(this is the control freak cupboards where I mark the end of a box with a paper clip on the packet, I know absolutely bonkers but it seems to help me somehow not sure how!)
 
It is hard when children are poorly and they don't yet have the full comprehension why they feel so rotten. I know when we are ill we can be a bit grumpy and we tend to know what is wrong with us and time will heal us. I don't think you are bonkers, any memory aids are great if it keeps you straight. I am the queen at making lists. My brain now has more wholes in it than Swiss cheese this way I remember items or get jobs straight in my head so I don't get too overwhelmed when I have much to do.
 
Day 143
The youngest is nearly on the mend which is the best news today. Not so successful was my attempt at doing the lemon pancakes as my ‘dessert’ after tea I seemed to have lost the necessary skill to do it but think a lot of it is luck of the draw! I ate them but there was no way the resembled a pancake they were very abstract 🤣.
 
lol sounds lijke my attempt at making oat pancakes, I didn't have the knack or the skill. Mine looked more like scrambled eggs by the time I had massacred them 🤣
 
Day 144
Good day today I ordered 2 new shirts/blouses to go over jeans (jeans!!) which felt great and my stock black leggings have now become my ‘lounge’ (I wish haha!) wear. I spent probably half a decade in black leggings and a top and sure I have talked about it before but it did become my uniform as it was the only thing I felt comfortable in and I felt covered in. I longed to be able to just throw on a pair of jeans and top and be done so now being able to do that is liberating! I have a way to go on the loss and and not at my goal yet. I am now on the go slow part in terms of weight loss and that is something I am happy with as I have lost a good amount. It’s keeping eye on the goal but also being grateful for milestones like being able to wear jeans and a top!
 
Day 145
I hope everyone is well and enjoying the fireworks my eldest went to the fireworks with my husband and loved it which is the first year he hasn’t been scared of them! Good day on the plan I have started the ‘new’ box so thinking ahead to next order now! I have the house to myself on Sunday as my husband is taking both of the boys to see my mother in law and I am going to put some stuff into storage we are about to make an initial start on renovating the house which should be interesting but is needed! Have a lovely weekend everyone!
 
Day 146
Weigh in even with weigh in tomorrow so we will see what happens. I do think I may be due to up calories slightly for a week /eat normal food as have found on some occasions I feel hungry but on some days I have been lacklustre with drinking the water later through the day and leaving it to later on. However, if I do it won’t be until after next Saturday as off to a party and want to give myself a fighting chance. Has anyone got any good tips on the week break when on a VLCD? Any tips gratefully received!
 
Day 147
Have had to write this early on as really delighted and shocked I have another 3 lbs off and have lost the 5st!!
I am in regards to my weight a bit of a glass half full and a bit like if it’s too good to be true it is(cynical!) but after years of struggling getting out of this mindset is tough! Maybe that’s the self sabotage I have mentioned on here ( been up a bit at 6am is a bit early to be considering this isn’t it!?) as I have always pretty much for the past 10 years had my weight and in work environments it’s always been me the ‘one the diet’ and a sort of defence mechanism’ psychologically ‘oh Bertie is on a diet as per’ (I’m not called Bertie by the way 😂but it is similar to my maiden name and is my nickname!) Anyhow I am going to look at is on the positive side and not tea myself down which I can do rather a lot in relation to my weight so here goes I have lost 5st, I have worked hard for it and I am proud of myself. If anyone is reading this hope you aren’t cringing too much at me having an internal early morning debate with myself. My mam always used to say there is never a dull moment with me and the fact I can have a conversation with myself early morning proves it 🤣.
 
Day 148
Quick check in today but have had a good day but busy on the work front! Hoping this is a final push ahead of Christmas and it eases off a little bit (but not to the point of nothing coming in!) stayed on top of the water today and am considering buying some of the Exante festive shakes however wondering if the Irish cream one will be a tiramisu Shake in disguise!
 
Day 149
Bit of an NSV for me today so feeling a bit weepy but delighted!! It took me a while to figure out what NSV meant but now I know it’s definitely how you feel!
The dress for my work colleagues birthday this Saturday zips up!! For the first time in I don’t know how long I feel like I can go to a social function not full of dread feeling self conscious and not happy in what I am wearing! It was a little goal I have had in mind for the past month or so and I thought as the do is this Saturday best give it a go and it went on and I started crying (maybe hormones ?) sorry I am really over sharing here but if I had been where I was on day 1 and off to the party on Saturday mentally and physically I would have cancelled and said I can’t go so this had made me emotional as well as it’s given me a new perspective on life. I am rambling I know and still have my goal to achieve but I am grateful for this forum which has allowed me to document my thoughts and feelings and made me accountable as the diary is called (that’s accountable 😂) accountable!! Thank you all the lovely people who are on here I can’t express how much reading your posts and support helps. I know I sound like I am a mad woman accepting an Oscar here but I mean it maybe not written the best but there it is!!
 
Day 150
Have had a good day today still on a high of yesterday fitting into a dress but it’s been a good day work has gone well and I am feeling positive!
I am taking my youngest to a playgroup tomorrow that has been closed since the e pandemic so it will be lovely to let him enjoy some normality!
 
Day 151
Nice day playing with my youngest and he enjoyed the playgroup today. I got another little order in as well with some new things to try the Thai noodle pots which I am dubious of and the festive range Irish cream shake I am hoping for Baileys style taste (even though I really hate Baileys the really stuff after a traumatic downing a tumbler of it when I was about 21) so hopefully it tastes nice maybe not aiming for Baileys eh!?
 
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