Ange82much - Beginners Maintenance Diary

ange82much

ange82much

Member
Look, i'm slightly premature here, because technically I still have one-point-something kg to go (about 3lbs), (maybe a couple of weeks work??), but i'm starting to think about what happens when I get to my target.

I'm sort of scared that I don't know what i'm doing and that if I don't keep getting endorphin blasts from seeing the scales drop, that i'll lose interest, get hungry, pig out, return to square one. Or worse than square one. So this is the point of this diary, to try and keep myself accountable for what's ahead, and to document if it's easy or hard and what I might learn. I've seen it said that maintenance is yoyo-ing on a tight string. I like that. At the same time it sounds really tough because you have to motivate yourself to plug back in to the discipline really regularly. We'll see.

The story so far is that I've been a much bigger yoyo dieter. I'll apologise up front but I do metric (I can do lbs, but stones and lbs are a leap too far!). Typically my high to low cycle is about a year probably, then my low to high cycle might be about 3 years, so every 4 years ish i'm round and round again on the weight front. As a result I have size 8, 10, 12, 14 clothes in the wardrobe! (Just now dipping back in to the 10's - one of which is a black pencil skirt which I know I bought back in UK before I moved to Australia and that was 23 years ago, but it's like I just got some new clothes! I've got it eyed up for an interstate work trip next week!)

This year has been the fastest drop ever and I've lost 15kg since January, taking me from size 14 to size 10 (72kg to 57kg - i'm 161cm). I've been counting calories (target of less than 1000, but actually averaging about 880) and to make sure i'm not hungry I've been strict with no sweet stuff, no white carbs, and no splurges/days off, and making sure I have plenty of protein, good fats, and heaps of veggies. I even mastered the art of the zero calorie party (eat beforehand, drink soda water), which sounds very dull but it wasn't hard once i'd set the rules! Anyway the whole thing has worked really well this year, but for the first time this week i'm starting to think about the end of the 'diet', and for the first time i'm starting to get a few pangs for 'naughty stuff' - so I need a new focus or a plan or something.

So back to the situation, and i'm not sure what's going to suit me best. Would I just ease off a bit? Would I stick to what i'm doing during the week and go back to eating heaps more at weekends? Would I set an acceptable weight range and do the yoyo thing by increasing/decreasing all the time? Dunno.
 
I weighed in at 57.2kg again this morning for the third time in a row, and am slightly disappointed that it's not dropped a bit. I don't think i'm cut out for this maintenance thingl!

Calories have been on track, but I have felt peckish the last few days and have eaten a small snack each day whereas previously I only had about 10 snacks in total in the last 4 months and was happy enough just to stick to mealtimes. Not sure why this is really, although today's reason is that hubby (P) has started a diet/healthy eating regime today, which you think would help me and be a good thing, but in actual fact here I am at 6pm waiting for him to come home from work so that we can eat together, when left to my own devices i'd've eaten an hour ago (and not bothered with the snack). So this is something I get slightly grumpy about, i.e. when I can't eat when I want - especially if it means being hungry in the day, then eating most of my calories at night, and as a consequence only being awake a few hours to enjoy being full. I know that sort of schedule suits a lot of people, but I like to eat early in the day and be feeling a bit hungry again by bedtime. Anyway, my little stint a few months ago looking at the Beck Diet Solution (psychological approach to dieting) taught me that it's not an emergency if i'm hungry, and it's really not a big drama, so stop being dramatic (actually it's a lot more scientific and sensitive and sensible than that, but you get the gist).
 
whoosh this morning! 56.7kg. This means i'm now in the same kg as my target. Feeling super happy and motivated and all those things that a whoosh brings, which I suppose brings me back to the long-term point of this thread - how will I be when I don't have those changes and i'm not given a mood-blast by the scales? The obvious answer to that is start on another project - eg exercise, and get my highs from some sort of progressive new pb's. My head says is a good idea and lets get started, but my heart's not really quite on board yet. Basically i'm feeling lazy, the days are getting colder/shorter here and i'm more tempted to crank up a knitting project and investigate thermal underwear options than hit the gym.
 
So the diet has been completely on plan and I've been back from holiday for a week and lived a week of 'normal'.

Unfortunately the scales aren't really paying attention to the program and have stayed the same, or to be more precise, they've gone up 0.3 to 57kg this morning, which is what I was at 6 days ago. I've had a quiet word with them and i'm hoping they'll sort out their attitude by tomorrow.

It's not too much to ask - just 1 more kg - is it?! Aside from that I know it doesn't matter - i'll stick to plan, i'll lose at some point and i'm feeling good at the size i'm at regarding how the clothes are fitting and those occasional unexpected reflections in street windows. It's just that I want to get to my target!

P has proposed a walk to one of the further away pubs tonight. He's on a diet and 10,000 steps plan so is keen to get in a bit of walking. So walking to the pub is the solution obviously. The nearest one is 200m, so that doesn't really tick the box. Then apparently there are 13 more within 5 minutes walk of where we live, so they're not very helpful either. Anyway sounds like a plan to me, and the question is, do I manage my calories to include a glass of wine, or just go for the soda water.....
 
The good news is that we went to a further away pub than the proposed pub, and I was thirsty by the time I got there. Could've been a recipe for disaster, but in my case meant that although my calorie totals yesterday meant I could have had a wine, a pint of soda water sounded much more appealing! Temptation removed.
Weekend. Hurray!!! And I probably should be cooking up batches of stuff for next week, but not really in the mood for that at the moment. No major social events to negotiate this weekend either for a change, so looking forward to a bit of relaxing with no mental plans on negotiating copious alcohol/food events to worry about.
 
Had a big week (work wise) and was on lock-down due to being cross-examined in court about a patent of ours that I was involved with doing the research work on, that is now being contested by our competitors. Had about a million pages of evidence to absorb, and the cross-examination all concerned events from 2001-2004, so we're going back a bit! Anyway it went well, apparently. More important it's DONE! And i'm back home again which means the scales are within reach and I can better control what I eat than living in a hotel!

I'm still a tantalising 0.4kg from target (1lb), at 56.4kg, so the plan is still to just steam along as normal until I get to the magic 55.x kg - this kg seems to be taking ages to lose though.
 
Thought i'd update again :)

Since hitting goal about a month ago, and because I was still in the groove, I decided that I wanted some wiggle room to maintain within, and set another goal of 54kg, which I got to about 2 weeks ago. So i'm totally happy with 54 and don't really want to go back to 56 for a while at least and so my challenge now is to stay here instead! Loving being here lots! I fit in to my last clothing item last week which was a pair of jeans saved at the back of the wardrobe for 10 years. They fit! But not exactly the height of fashion... I've bought a few new clothes too and I'm feeling great, and I don't want to lose more, on the other hand i'd rather lose than gain at the moment whilst I'm figuring out how to stay here.

I tried increasing my overall calories 10% last week, so from a daily average of about 860 to around 950, but decided to average it over a week so that most of the time I was dieting as before really, but a couple of times a week I had a few glasses of wine and a bit more food than normal. That worked for maintaining alright although not a long enough timescale to really tell.

Ideally I want to be able to eat more than I have been, but hoping to bump it up gradually. (Or really I should be exercising more, so just trying to get my head around what that's going to look like too). At the moment though i'm working overseas so I can't really measure anything this week and have to choose food off a menu, so i've decided to do a bit of an IF approach where possible, and skip dinners. So i'm not really going to know how that's working either until I get home.
 
Target: Under 54kg
Current: 53.2kg

I maintained or dropped a bit after my overseas trip, then had an indulgent weekend - nothing crazy, but kind of what 'normal' people do! Then I've just been working interstate again this week so more days of not being able to measure or really choose what I eat. The outcome of everything is that i'm 53.2kg today, but skipped dinner last night (after too much lunch) so realistically i'm probably hovering just under 54kg.

This is exactly where I want to be, but i'm here by means that aren't really my long-term plan. In other words there's been too much over-eating of things that I wouldn't choose, followed by skipping meals etc, but at least it feels good to be back home again now, so I can settle in to some more regular eating patterns and see what effect they have on the scales. I've been doing 'proper' maintenance for almost a month now, but haven't learned much - or that's how it feels anyway. I'm still excited to be at this weight in the first place though, and enjoying the maintenance because of all the 'treats' that I've 'got away with'. Not sure whether that's really the right attitude, but anyway......
 
Target: Under 54kg
Current 52.8kg

ok since the last post it's been a week or so. I dropped another few grams for a couple of days to 52.5kg, then had a long weekend. Well, it was a normal weekend theoretically, but eating-wise (glass-of-wine-wise) it started on Friday and went til Monday. So then I put a kilo back on. No surprise there. Back to 53.5kg. Then I had a couple of good days like I would've done whilst losing and am now back to 52.8kg.

So i'm really happy with that. The Scales and I are quite good friends at the moment.

And I decided that for July (my second month of Maintenance) I would accept (embrace) that there would be high calorie days (probably weekends) and I would need low calorie days to make up for that, and that was a reasonable ongoing lifestyle thing if that's the way that works best for me. So it's a suck-it-and-see-month, rather than my grand plans of the 10% thing in June that was never really measurable anyway.

I also decided to ditch the kitchen scales for measuring and calculating calories for everything except the big ticket items in July. So that's going fairly ok in the all-of 4 days that this month has been going. I did the dieting phase from January this year for 5 months, so i'm fairly familiar with what an acceptable plate of calories looks like for most of my normal menu items. Anyway, time will tell but have to say i'm loving the maintenance thing still.
 
ange82much said:
Look, i'm slightly premature here, because technically I still have one-point-something kg to go (about 3lbs), (maybe a couple of weeks work??), but i'm starting to think about what happens when I get to my target.

I'm sort of scared that I don't know what i'm doing and that if I don't keep getting endorphin blasts from seeing the scales drop, that i'll lose interest, get hungry, pig out, return to square one. Or worse than square one. So this is the point of this diary, to try and keep myself accountable for what's ahead, and to document if it's easy or hard and what I might learn. I've seen it said that maintenance is yoyo-ing on a tight string. I like that. At the same time it sounds really tough because you have to motivate yourself to plug back in to the discipline really regularly. We'll see.

The story so far is that I've been a much bigger yoyo dieter. I'll apologise up front but I do metric (I can do lbs, but stones and lbs are a leap too far!). Typically my high to low cycle is about a year probably, then my low to high cycle might be about 3 years, so every 4 years ish i'm round and round again on the weight front. As a result I have size 8, 10, 12, 14 clothes in the wardrobe! (Just now dipping back in to the 10's - one of which is a black pencil skirt which I know I bought back in UK before I moved to Australia and that was 23 years ago, but it's like I just got some new clothes! I've got it eyed up for an interstate work trip next week!)

This year has been the fastest drop ever and I've lost 15kg since January, taking me from size 14 to size 10 (72kg to 57kg - i'm 161cm). I've been counting calories (target of less than 1000, but actually averaging about 880) and to make sure i'm not hungry I've been strict with no sweet stuff, no white carbs, and no splurges/days off, and making sure I have plenty of protein, good fats, and heaps of veggies. I even mastered the art of the zero calorie party (eat beforehand, drink soda water), which sounds very dull but it wasn't hard once i'd set the rules! Anyway the whole thing has worked really well this year, but for the first time this week i'm starting to think about the end of the 'diet', and for the first time i'm starting to get a few pangs for 'naughty stuff' - so I need a new focus or a plan or something.

So back to the situation, and i'm not sure what's going to suit me best. Would I just ease off a bit? Would I stick to what i'm doing during the week and go back to eating heaps more at weekends? Would I set an acceptable weight range and do the yoyo thing by increasing/decreasing all the time? Dunno.
Click to expand...
Hi Ange. Hope you don't mind me having a look at your diary here. I've only started a week ago on Exante but I really emphatise with your journey because it seems I have a similar weight to lose to what you had, I also have all the clothes from 8 to 14 (when I had to try on a 16 pair of trousers I woke up - didn't buy it, I bought exante instead), and I am also worried about the time I get to the maintenance stage. I am fully focusing on the diet but don't want to forget that 'normal life' does include food and there will be regular life after I am done with this. And I feel that and finding the appropriate balance/grey area will be a lot harder than the nothing approach of a meal replacement diet.

I look forward to reading your maintenance stories, challenges, thoughts! You've come so far, you've done so amazingly well, all you need is to stick to it now, so happy to see that is possible!
 
Hi Alecto - thanks for the encouragement! You sound really similar to me. Great work on putting down the size 16's!!
The hardest part of this whole weight-loss thing by far was getting started, so you've done/are doing the hard bit! Honestly, Maintenance has been great so far because my brain has already been switched on to preferring healthy foods from the diet discipline, and the good eating habits are there too.

I think if you have the discipline to do Exante then you're in a great position and you just apply the same mental attitude to the maintenance, so that you stick to what you decide to do, and have fun with it too. (Although i'm very early days, so know nothing on how this is going to go really, even for myself)
I must say i'd never heard of Exante before I found this forum, there's nothing like it promoted here in Aus - I was gobsmacked when i realised there was no 'normal' food!!
 
So i'm up 1kg after a weekend of behaving like a 'normal person'. A couple of drinks on friday night, a lot of drinks on Saturday night (and a Vietnamese meal, and birthday cake, and cheese platter), and a party at ours to watch the football. I was pretty good on Sunday, but had a single glass of wine in the evening, and ate with P, so not as healthy as if I got my own food. So overall I was careful-ish apart from Saturday night. And all that is ok, and fits with how i see this panning out long-term, but what's different this week is that i'm not 'glad' to get back to the strict healthiness. I did it. Monday was back to the diet habits, tuesday is on track so far, but I would've preferred to carry on indulging, whereas previously this year I've felt a bit stodgy after over-indulging, and been keen to get back to the low calories.

So the message here is that I need to watch it. I'm not naturally going to want to be a clean eater or a small eater. The more treats I have, the more I want. Having a treat doesn't satisfy me in to naturally going back to eating well, so when I have them I need to do the 'mindful eating' routine and make sure I enjoy it and make sure I know it's a treat, in other words not just eat whatever I feel like mindlessly.
 
ange82much said:
Look, i'm slightly premature here, because technically I still have one-point-something kg to go (about 3lbs), (maybe a couple of weeks work??), but i'm starting to think about what happens when I get to my target.

I'm sort of scared that I don't know what i'm doing and that if I don't keep getting endorphin blasts from seeing the scales drop, that i'll lose interest, get hungry, pig out, return to square one. Or worse than square one. So this is the point of this diary, to try and keep myself accountable for what's ahead, and to document if it's easy or hard and what I might learn. I've seen it said that maintenance is yoyo-ing on a tight string. I like that. At the same time it sounds really tough because you have to motivate yourself to plug back in to the discipline really regularly. We'll see.

The story so far is that I've been a much bigger yoyo dieter. I'll apologise up front but I do metric (I can do lbs, but stones and lbs are a leap too far!). Typically my high to low cycle is about a year probably, then my low to high cycle might be about 3 years, so every 4 years ish i'm round and round again on the weight front. As a result I have size 8, 10, 12, 14 clothes in the wardrobe! (Just now dipping back in to the 10's - one of which is a black pencil skirt which I know I bought back in UK before I moved to Australia and that was 23 years ago, but it's like I just got some new clothes! I've got it eyed up for an interstate work trip next week!)

This year has been the fastest drop ever and I've lost 15kg since January, taking me from size 14 to size 10 (72kg to 57kg - i'm 161cm). I've been counting calories (target of less than 1000, but actually averaging about 880) and to make sure i'm not hungry I've been strict with no sweet stuff, no white carbs, and no splurges/days off, and making sure I have plenty of protein, good fats, and heaps of veggies. I even mastered the art of the zero calorie party (eat beforehand, drink soda water), which sounds very dull but it wasn't hard once i'd set the rules! Anyway the whole thing has worked really well this year, but for the first time this week i'm starting to think about the end of the 'diet', and for the first time i'm starting to get a few pangs for 'naughty stuff' - so I need a new focus or a plan or something.

So back to the situation, and i'm not sure what's going to suit me best. Would I just ease off a bit? Would I stick to what i'm doing during the week and go back to eating heaps more at weekends? Would I set an acceptable weight range and do the yoyo thing by increasing/decreasing all the time? Dunno.
Click to expand...
What did you find the hardest in doing the zero calorie parties? How did you deal with any challenges? I like that idea!
 
The zero calorie parties were really easy actually. They were really easy mentally too because i wasn't trying to make any shall-I-shan't-i decisions.
And i was completely honest if anyone asked and I said I was calorie counting and then either say that i had no more calories left, end of conversation, or launch in to a boring monologue of all the minutiae of my eating plans :) . But hardly anyone asked, and they didn't really know what I was drinking (could've been G+T etc). Plus i'm not the sort of person who is overly fussed what other people think, and i'm not a people pleaser either!!! So if they don't like it, basically it doesn't really bother me!

I definitely recommend giving it a go. I felt very pleased with myself afterwards too. And I actually enjoyed the party more too because I wasn't feeling half guilty or annoyed that I was having calories because of the situation and not because I particularly wanted them.
 
I think with closer friends, they get used to your habits too, so for 6 months there, I switched to having soda water with our football crowd, and there was a bit of comment initially, then they got used to it and i'd told them it was for a 6 month period whilst I lost weight which they of course understood, now the football season has finished, so i'm flexible to decide what happens next season. If I carry on with the soda water it'll be easy regarding peoples expectations because i'm now the one that drinks soda water. Or I could go back to beer/wine. Or half/half it. I suppose what i'm trying to say is that there's only a short period of time where people are surprised/concerned when you change your habits with them, then they just get used to the 'new you' and it's easier that way.
 
Target: Under 54 kg
Current: 51.4 kg

Thought i'd post an update (because I have other more unpleasant things I should be doing). I'm still dropping weight a bit and that's because i'm still watching what i'm eating and that's because i'm still motivated to restrict myself for some reason.

Maybe I still haven't quite got over the buzz of a new low (got one yesterday, woo, yeay. And maintained it today. yippee!!) Ok, I clearly haven't got over the buzz of a new low.... I'm definitely worried about the motivation vanishing and then piling on the weight again, so i'm erring on the cautious side.

So which is it? Am I being consciously cautious or am I chasing a buzz. Don't know really. I'm still happy with my target of under 54kg, but at the same time i'm obviously doing more than I need to to stay under it, so I can't quite psycho-analyse my motivations.

I was at a conference interstate this week and felt a bit hungry at times which I don't normally sit through. If I was at home i'd eat something, but because it was fixed meal times I couldn't. I was eating enough, so not sure whether the hunger was because I knew that everyone else was troughing in to scones/cakes/quiches/sausage rolls at morning/afternoon tea breaks (and I didn't touch the snacks), or because I didn't have control over the timing. Anyway, it's done. I'm home again. Next week i'm away again for 10 days but that's at a mine site so should be easy (scenario there is buffet brekkie plus pick up whatever you want to eat during the day from the food bar in a morning - so only a minute or so discipline needed to make the choices then you're off in the bus and stuck with whatever you chose!!)

Anyway, basically i'm about 2 months in to this maintenance thing and overall i'd say its been like the dieting bit, but a lot better because I've been eating more generally, and also having a couple of evenings 'off' per week - i.e. a few glasses of wine and a meal out. Probably the wine is the biggest indulgence because when I've been drinking that, I've just had whatever I wanted (although i'm a total lightweight at the moment so can't get in to too much trouble). Even with an evening 'off' of food I've chosen semi-carefully, or left the carbs, but that's been because my brain still wants to and not because i'm hanging out for junk but depriving myself. I've not been hanging out for sugar either, and have hardly had anything sweet, and never as a dessert. A couple of times when i've had a museli bar it's been mid-afternoon, so the lack of sweet tooth probably makes life easier too.

So at the moment all is good, at the same time i'm aware this 'goodness' is precarious and i'm concerned how i'll go when things get mentally tough. On the other hand I said that during the dieting phase too, and that bit all went without any dramas. Perhaps I've found the "lifestyle changes" diet nivarna. Don't think so somehow...…..
 
Target 51kg -53kg
Current 51.3kg

Time for an update.
So I've changed my target. I've been under my old target for a few months now and I like it, and I don't think i'd be comfortable to see 54kg right now, so I might as well change the target.
Everything's going really well at the moment. I've been trying to maintain about 3-4 months now, but for the last few weeks I finally feel that my body has accepted where I am.

Previous to that, every time I ate more, my body hung on to it immediately, and the scales showed a difference immediately, like it wanted to gain back what i'd lost. But for the past couple of weeks I've eaten more some days and less some days and the scales haven't had as much of a hissy fit about it - they've been cruisy. "You ate more? no problems, i'll just say you were the same as yesterday. You ate less? That's fine i'll just say it evens out from that wine-splurge"

The other good thing is i'm not chasing the new low any more. I had a 50.7kg and I was actually a bit shocked. Then a week or so later I saw it again, and felt it was too low again and wanted to eat more. And it happened a third time, and again it was a bit of a shock and I made a conscious effort to eat more. So I've changed to a target range instead of an upper target and at the moment i'm hanging around in the 51's for 80% of the time with the occasional day below and more days above, which i'm really happy about. And surprisingly i'm still motivated to stay in that range and it's not boring to try and keep there.

Good thing #3 is that my knee has improved enough to start doing more exercise, and this is coupled with the fact that my head is also keen to go with that idea, which is amazing really after having basically about a year out. So i'm increasing my walking and i'm scamming some freebie 'try out' classes at local gyms. Last week I did a weights class (good!) and a yoga class (bit dull, first time I've tried it!), and i'm doing a spin class tomorrow.
 
Target 51 and no more than 53.5 after upcoming holiday
Current 51.2kg

I don't look at this log between entries, and it's always quite surprising to read my thoughts on where I was last time. You really do forget what it was like along the way.
So my last entry was about 6 weeks ago and I thought the story had finished, really, and Maintenance was just going to happen.

And it did sort of, but a couple of weeks after that, I went overseas for a work trip and stayed fairly diligent, and ended up losing another couple of kg so I was down to 48.6 at one point, but a regular 49.X which shocked me really (i wasn't expecting it, and hadn't been hungry) but looked a bit scraggy to be honest. On the other hand I felt good and loved eating and had plenty of energy, so the plan from there was to gain a couple of kg back which I enjoyed doing with gusto!! I didn't go crazy but I did have bread and more alcohol and generally bigger meat portions etc, and sure enough I gained another 3kg probably to around 52, then had an indulgent weekend as a sort of a final fling and was up to 53 ish temporarily.

Now i'm being strict for 10 days before my holiday to 1) re-exercise the resistance muscle so that I can be comfortable that I can slip back in to the discipline and lose, if I want 2) to have as good a start as I can for holiday because then i'll be ok with putting a couple of kg back on during it).

The other thing that happened is that I joined a local gym and started doing weights classes, as well as spin classes, core classes (they're as un-fun as it sounds!) and also yoga, so I've been there pretty much every day that I haven't been travelling in the last month and am loving it, which is great news because during my 22kg weight loss for the first half of this year I didn't do any exercise at all and didn't feel like doing any. So I can fool myself that maybe a kg of the extra weight at the moment is 'all muscle.....' :)
 
Target: Same as last post!
Current: 50.1kg

and another 6 weeks passes....! I pretty much did what I said I was going to do in the last post and had a good diligent stretch just before my holiday and was hovering at around 50.5kg, then came back from holiday and was hovering around 52.5kg, so gained 2kg in 10 days which was fine.

My current dream weight is still 51.X but after the holiday i wanted to lose the full 2kg, just to exercise the discipline-muscle againand prove to myself I could be in control, (and then gradually put the 1kg back on again).

And I lost 1kg again within a week, then had a bit of a wobbly weekend, then it's taken me another 3 weeks after that really to get that last kg off again (and I really only did it last week when I was away working on my own for 9 days and could organise my own food without distractions). So message to self here is that I have been ok at maintaining in a regular environment, but to lose at this level I have to be consistent. I can't lose and have a slack weekend for example. Or eat crap.

I"m still going to the gym every day and still really loving it and feel great, but I have to say that I don't think it's made a jot of difference to my weight. In fact over that 3 week period, it was only when I was away for the 9 days and never got to the gym, and never did any exercise, that the last kg came off, so in my case at least, my weight seems to be 100% diet. Exercise either makes me hungry or adds on the muscle or both - neither of which is getting the kg off (not that that's the target I should be aiming for I know, and it's not what i'm aiming for, but just saying.....)

So now i'm back in the 50.X's which is slightly skraggsville zone, but is also part of the plan because of course Christmas is coming so this is my wiggle room. Rinse and repeat the story from the last post - i.e. i'll gain a couple of kg over Christmas, then hopefully ditch it in January/Feb.

Still super-excited that i'm motivated to keep this going, and whilst I've enjoyed some evenings off, or long lunches etc, I've not felt the urge to eat rubbish on my own really - i.e. 90% of the indulgencies have been for social occasions. So I just have to be grateful because that's just lucky or something, that i'm not fighting urges to scoff down the bread or pasta or cake generally (or perhaps my palate has really changed).

Living the dream...……for the moment :)
 
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