Hi guys.
So firstly, the doctor. Nope. As phoenyx said, my gp would just say "go off the diet". Theres no point as I wouldnt get any ACTUAL help or clarification.
That said, I got a bit worse after hubby got home and he got me a clementine and half a banana (zoe nabbed the other half) and some water. Within half an hour I was better again.
So we sat and talked about it and we both agreed that this diet is only worth doing if you can do it properly, or even KINDA properly. Which seems Im not gonna be able to do. This has happened to me before. Exactly the same. The on-the-verge-of-dizziness, the light-headed, the sweating, shaking, loss of colour. And itching. Last time, I roke out in itchies and that happened again this afternoon. I had forgotten about that. Until today when it happened again.
Anyway.
We talked. And we looked at everything....trying to see the big picture. And we came up with this:
I started WW. It was bizarre. We were talking about it and we came to SW and I said that I dont want to do that again. So he said, what about WW? I said that I wasnt really overly keen as I dont like the counting but that I had been told that there was some non-counting plan available. So maybe that might be a good idea. I need structure but I also need easy, low prep and low cost. So we both had a look online and I was looking around trying to get an explanation of how that non-counting (I didnt know what it was called) plan worked..he was looking up the classes. Our local, closest one was at 6:30 tonight. So he goes "oh, it says here theres one at linskill...at ..oh..6:30! You could go!" It was 6:08. I had to walk there and its about a mile away. And I had no shoes on. So in a split second we did the "should i? do you think I should? what if its crap. what if im crap? What about the cost? we cant really afford it. and why cant I just do my packs, i just want to do my packs!!*sulk* will i be crap at this? do you really think i can do it? will i justbe wasting money again?" and he said "you cant put a price on health. we know that better than anyone (a reference to his illness) so shut up about the money bit. and you will be fab. just give it a chance and really try to understand it and learn it and follow it and give it at least 2 months to really work for you. and you will be fine. i dont know why the packs arent agreeing with you, but this has happened before and although i was happy for you to be on them, even though its a very controversial diet, because you were very happy and your weight losses were fantastic...i am more happy for you to do something that i know isnt going to do you any lasting harm and seeing as youve had these reactions twice now, you should really just try this WW thing and see how you get on. youre gonna have to go back onto real food eventually anyway and youre the lightest youve been since we got married. so you have much less far to go to get to your goal this time. you look fantastic, youve done fantastic and youre much nearer to your goal and you can do it. and you will do it. now get your shoes on and go. i love you. "
And that....that is why i married this boy.
I got my shoes on and went to go. I got to the door and he went into the living room to be with the girls...and i stood there for 3 seconds before i broke down in tears. and ran back to him, tears streaming. and i threw my arms around him and said..."thank you for supporting me. i love you" and then i wiped my tears on his shoulder and ran out the door. hahaha because we are THAT couple.
so im going to give WW a go. its the simple start plan this week...for everyone, it would seem. so im giving that a try and it looks much better than the counting points Sh!te. lol. i cant be doing with all that. I havent the time. This is just a list of what you can have and you just get on with it. And coming from VLCD the list of REAL food seems so generous. Everyone else was whinging that all their faves werent on the list or were on as an extra treat and im like thinking "are you fkn nuts? this is loads to choose from!" haha
so Im going to stay here at least for a while, if you guys will still have me. im going to be a bit wobbly for a while i expect, while i get a handle on this MASSIVE change. and while i get my head around eating again...and the plan...and everything.
I actually expect a bit of a gain this week. Glycogen and all that. So. Im going to still use my diary just like before and plan all my meals here and on MFP...and ...more...next week Im going to start working out again. Im actually kinda (ok, really..the more I think about it) excited about that. I hate exercise...dont get me wrong. But I LOVED how i felt when i did it...and what it did for my body. amazing!!
its all happened so quick. it was the LAST thing id ever had thought would have happened today. but. thats how life works....for us anyway.
so we are gonna work out what to do about my packs tonight/tomorrow. I have...LOADS.
So here we go...new year and an unexpected new chapter!
Who's with me? lol
Im going to bed now. Head is spinning with everything that has happened today Im just exhausted. x
