bex's LT journey!

[bex!]

well im joining the diary bandwagon!!! only just started reading the diaries which are really inspirational. im slow at most things except eating!! :8855:

ok so im 23 years old and have been slowly putting on weight since my 2nd year in college (17), i got a part time job at tesco's and couldnt resist all the buy one get one free's and the staff discount!!! it pretty much went downhill from there.

so there's me 6 years later and 8 stones of extra padding weighing me down both physically and mentally. i had health problems that i was ignoring and i stopped going on nights out with friends because i felt so embarrassed and would only go if food was involved as i could sit down and do what i do best. EAT!!

ive tried all the little diets since i started gaining but i would lose my enthusiasm quickly and pile more on. i even tried lighterlife when i was 19 but quit after 3 weeks, my excuse i couldnt afford it!! yet i could go for big meals out and buy chocolate and cakes all the time??

then someone told my mum about lipotrim (cheaper than LL), they had lost loads and looked great. so off i went to the chemist and weighed in with the feeling that finally i was going to get slim and be happy!! sadly i failed not once but twice, i HATED the diet, so when that thing i called a friend called to me again i started eating and gained even more weight. :sigh:

i cant really explain how i started this time round. i think my breaking point was i needed to go up another clothes size and i had a choice to slowly get bigger and bigger or do something about it. this was a monday and i suddenly got really annoyed with being fat and the next day i got weighed!!!

17stones and 6lb!! i was carrying a person!! albet a small one!! so armed with my packs i started my 1st week, which went really well and was fab once ketosis hit, no resentment this time and i was rewared with a 10lb loss and now im on week 7, ive lost 30lb and dropped 2 clothes sizes!!

ive had a few tough days but im finding new ways to cope with these and im loving the control i have, long may it last and something i never thought i would say but the buzz i get from losing is soo much better than eating!!!

due to me suddenly starting the diet and because of my numerous fails plus resenting the diet i didnt take any before pictures or my inches as to be honest i never thought i would get this far and not cheat!! but ive done them now as i should still see a difference once im at target.

ok thats my little essay over!! heres to a great week!!!

xox

 

[Catt]

Thankyou for sharing your story Bex. You are indeed being rewarded and you are doing fantastic. I can't wait to come back off my holiday and restart and see how you have progressed Err well maybe I can wait but I am looking forward to seeing your before and after pics too.

Keep it sweet hunny - loadsa luck xxx

 

[~nix~]

yea before and after pics ....

and good for you for just going and doing it.

we all stick together and we will all be fine

 

[Niamh]

Hun,

Am delighted you started a diary. It is something to look back on at the end of your journey and see how far you have come!

A lot of what you said I can identify with especially the spur of the moment decision to go on LT. Also the lack of enthusiasm for socialising.

You are doing so well on this diet hun and eventhough you have good days and bad days you are sticking with it.

Heres to a slimmer you in no time

Niamh xxx

 

[bex!]

thank you ladies!!

catt - i want to thank you for all your support since i started LT and this forum. you have left me some lovely posts that inspired me and kept me focused. i wish you well on refeed hun.

nic - together we can succeed, theres a saying 'the road to success is full of many twist and turns' or something like that anyway! my point was we can beat those dead ends and get to where we want to be.

niamh - thank you for all the encouragement you have offered since i started. you have really inspired me with your story, i think you are a strong woman!!

its funny with the socialising aspect of this diet as i know alot have struggled with it or been in food situations yet as i stopped going out anyway due to my weight i dont feel im missing out as such but i do get this excited feeling in my tummy the more i lose weight or when my clothes get looser that soon i will be out there again!! its like waiting for christmas!!

so thats another day finished and im feeling fine. just having a cup of warm water before bed! look at me all virtuous!!

strange night tonight i finished work and felt quite tired, the weather always does that to me and was just going to be lazy. so i had my shake and took my dogs for a walk which did wake me up abit. i then came home and cleaned the fridge!!! yep went into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water and suddenly got this urge to clean it!! the joys of tfr eh!!! :8855: im a clean freak now!!

i find the little things that i do whilst on this funny. im now organising everything and have even done my ironing whereas before it was piled high.

anywho im off to the land of nod now, thank you for reading.

xox

 

[bex!]

ok so ive had a few tough days this week, not with tfr but with home and work. it really hit home to me how much i used food to cope with things as all those feelings of eating came back and i had to be really strong to not go into the kitchen and raid the fridge. not because i was hungry but because thats what i used to do when things got hard and that mechanism is built in and even though i dont want the food now, it came out when i was feeling emotional.

the good news is i didnt give into the feelings and just cleaned instead, yes cleaned . my mum is thrilled as her house looks spotless. :8855:

it brought home to be how much i still need to learn, its not just losing the weight and getting smaller clothes but mentally i need to deal with my food issues. which hopefully in time i will.

off to work now, lets see if i get a good loss tomorrow.

xox

 

[sonkie]

Hiya hun and welcome on board the LT wagon......lol....you are doing brilliantly .....keep up the great work....xx

 

[Glam Rock Chick]

Good luck for the weigh in Bex! Have plenty of ironing here if you have run out!
I'm just being a lazy cow, will go and do it in a minute!

 

[~nix~]

yea be sure to let us all know how it goes

i love reading the weigh in pages and seeing how youve all done

 

[bex!]

well went for my 7th weigh in and lost 6lb!!! soooo pleased with this loss and its took me uner 15 stone which is another of my goals done!!!

im glad i didnt give in to the feelings of eating, which werent hunger ones but emotional. looks like cleaning is my new mechanism for the hard times.

anyway im feeling fab today, the suns shining and im 6lb lighter.

xox

 

[sonkie]

nice one, keep up the great work

 

[Glam Rock Chick]

Well done honey, you really deserved that! Lots of luck for next week!

 

[bex!]

well im nearly done with week 8!!! can not wait for weigh in on tuesday!! ive got 6lb to lose that will take me to 3 stone lost!! woohoo.

so strange to think that only a few weeks ago i was feeling ill, depressed and on the verge of a size 22. im so glad my mind clicked into place and i started this diet.

im enjoying the diet for the most part, i do have moments when boredom kicks in etc but im finding ways to deal with this. i usually clean or walk my dogs.

xox

 

[seashell]

hi, you have done so well, keep up the good work and I hope that I can be as strong as you and alot of others on here for the rest of my lt journey

 

[jemimarobin]

well done bex, just read your diary and sounds like you've been doing really well. recognising your emotional attachment to food is a big step. I have been using it for everything and I'm determined to crack it. I think being aware of your behaviours- why you seek food and when is important. I'm trying to find other things to reward myself with- for life!

good luck for tues my first weigh in is weds and I'm hoping it will spur me on!

 

[bex!]

so week 9 is already underway. its been a tough week, felt tired and just down in the dumps. my mum said its because i havent drank enough water especially with the weather being so warm. oh well.

im also over a week late, so feeling bloated and just generally blah!! i get that with this diet you can slow down or even stop but why do i have to still be bloated!!!

this week has been hard with family and stuff, alot of things happening or being said and decisions made and its been draining and emotional. all i wanted to do was eat, i didnt care what and it wasnt because i was hungry or was fed up of the diet but because thats my way of coping when it gets tough and i needed the comfort that eating gave me.

you will be pleased to know that i didnt give in to these urges but it was horrible. i hate feeling. before i could eat and the food seemed to absorb all the bad stuff and it wouldnt be as bad. now i know it didnt really and that food was what i used to mask dealing with the issue but i never had to feel the full extent and now i dont have the food to hide behind, its like im in limbo!!! :cry:

anyway on a positive note im now 4lb away from 3 stones lost!!! whoop whoop!! im also wearing a pair of size 16 pants today!!! ooh and i ordered a dress in a 14 to aim for and it FITS!!!!

ive got 2 weeks left at school then its 7 weeks off for summer, now i will still be working in the shop but atleast i can use the free time to recharge my batteries and get back to normal.

xox

 

[callya]

Hello Bex,

I've just finished my first week and have taken a lot of inspiration from your journal. You are doing so well and I hope I can manage to continue for as many weeks.

It is a break through to recognise the reason you eat, to then address it and over ride it like you did when you were so 'in need' of the familiar comfort from food, is brilliant and how empowering for you to have resisted it. Well done.

I shall think of you when I find myself in the same situation.

Keep up the good work.
Callya

 

[bex!]

thank you hun. it means alot to me that my journey on LT can inspire good luck on your road to slimdom!! well done on your 1st loss!!!

im feeling better this morning. i had a chat with my mum who put it all into persective for me and like she said i used to have moments like this when i was on food but then i could just have an extra bar of chocolate whereas now ive got to realise that life has tough times but they generally do pass and eating is not the answer because it only makes me more fat which thus makes me more unhappy.

im going to clean my room properly today and walk my dogs before work tonight and drink loads of water!! i have started with pains so hopefully it will happen and that will get rid of excess water ect.

anyway thanks for reading.

xox

 

[bex!]

well im back on top form!!!! had my 9th weigh in and i lost 6lb!!! to say i was shocked is an understatement. ive now lost 3stone 2lb in 9 weeks!!! when i did WW i had not even lost 1stone in this time.

also totm finally happened and my bloat just went!!! :8855:. plus my need to eat anything and everything in sight :17729:and my black mood. :raincloud: has gone away and im feeling positive again!!

i think it helped aswell that people are noticing, which makes it all worth the struggle. like my mum said though im still wearing the same style of clothes just in smaller sizes so people dont really notice a difference.

i dont want to buy any clothes until i really have to. ive got all my old stuff that i kept as i put weight on so that will do for the time being. im saving my pennies so i can go on a mad spending spree at the end of my LT journey.

well im off to get my new phone now.

xox

 

[Tinkerbellthefairy]

Well done Bex, fantastic loss again!!!! You must be over the moon. Won't be long till your in size 14's !!!
Emma x