Long post ahead ....
Im hoping to try and get some control back today and attempt to get back on track, Im thinking there is no way to meet my september challange but I want to carry on, especially with you guys and hope you will all stay with me??
Why is it sooooo hard?? And its really worrying me that one day Ill go through life with no stress and ill manage to tackle my wieght and then something else will come and ill go off the rails and it will all pile back on, how can I ever stop this cycle!!
Maybe I need hypnotherary!!!
Finished college now, and after my interview for the course in London I was offered a place
Really chuffed but in some ways has bought alot more problems. We would have to move to London, so me, my boyf and 2 Labradors....looking for a room as cant afford a bedsit or flat and obviously no-one wants to know!! then if we were to stay in Bournemouth (following our very nearing eviction) its also a battle for the same reason but on top of that no jobs coming in! I have been applying for around 10+ jobs a week and im lucky if I even get a response saying 'unfortunately on this occasion....'
Money is pretty tight but got to carry on with some hope!!
Missed you guys and going to try and post on here as much as possible...I dont even mean to not come on, I just get carried away in self wallow hee hee
xxx
Nee
It is brilliant to have you back, I have missed you! Your post is just so true for me as well. Losing weight, for us at least, is a lot more than just a diet. Its messing with ur minds too!!!
When you tlak about tackling stress, I am so in the same boat as you. I thought I was "sorted", I'd been healthy for quite a while and even weeks i didn't lose I knew I had not been binge eating so was well pleased with myself.
However last week, it was like everything fell apart, and unlike you, who has so much going on, I couldn't really pinpoint what was wrong- a "general Malaise" and I ate so much crap, completely out of control.
So I completely understand- big deal if we lose the weight if we put it all back on when stress hits as it always will.
I guess the key there, is that we know. We know key to our weight loss is learning how to deal with our emotions. Still not sure how, but I feel better today. I hope I'm learning how to cut these binges shorter- I managed to go for a run 4 times this week (down from 5 and 3 times less in gym) which kept me ticking over, and it really does flood me with good endorphins. I chose to spend time with a friend, ratrher than cut people out and see if talking could help me through. I rang someone who is always happy to lift me. I sat in starbucks and just read and thought. To just be. And I accepted, slowly, I got to this stage where I accepted I was low, that it would pass. I accepted that I cannot change the world, and that things at work that are out my control I need to accpet.
Anyway, 10 days later, I think I am out the other side. I hope. We'll see
I don't know if this in anyway helps. I just want you to know you are not alone. And yes this journey is along one, and I thin, for me anyway, once i reach goal weight (NOT IF!- positive mental attitude- what ad was that on??) I have to keep with minimins cos my problem is not that I am fat, my problem is that I binge eat, and that's like alcoholism- a life long issue.
So as long as you are here, I will be here too, and we will do this together.
Life seems to be at ajunction for you now, a lot of things going on, decisions to be made, and a lot of uncertainty as to what lies ahead. Stop beating yourself up and accept that right now thigns are very uncertian- that is extremely unsetlling on us- humans like dependency and knowing the way things go.
Ok so today you want to eat healthily and take care of yourself- tell me how are you going to do that (it helps to plan)
Take it one day at a time, concentrate on teh small things and remember
what lies behind you and in front of youis nothing compared to the power that lies within you.
Nee, welcome back I've missed you
