Changes

IrishLaura

Silver Member
A few months ago, I was happy enough with life, just sliding along, then something clicked inside.

I felt unhealthy, I quit smoking.
I was far too fat, I was afraid for my health, I started LT.

I suffer from panic disorder and depression and have done for a long time. So I decided to do something about this too. Only doing something about this was not so easy.

I joined a Condition Management Programme, which has started recently here in NI, and it has been hard mentally for me to attend meetings and so on.

Yesterday I had to have my first group meeting about confidence, it was harder than I could have expected. I got there, and to be honest it was not too bad.

My main motivation for going was to meet other people just like me, who go through what I go through, but I think it was not that sort of group.

Sitting there yesterday made me see just how much i have taken on to change...... the smoking.... weight loss...... my mental health, and you know what it made me see just how strong I really am.

The reason for the post is for me to get a few things of my chest, but its also to tell you something that I have never realised before.

They told me there are 4 steps to being more confident, but the 4th step stood out the most for me : PRAISE.

Something clicked, now I am an intelligent person, but I just never thought about it the way that it was explained before.

I have had people in my life, who trod on me, who wore me down, not any more! I admitted for the first time to someone, a fortnight ago, just why I 'was' so big. I am going to tell you all, because that was the old me, and I feel I can share it. I was so fat because I ate and ate so that my ex bf would not want me, he had a hold over me that I couldnt shake, and he done things to me that I promise, you do not want to hear, so because I was so young and didnt know how to leave him, I ate so that he didnt want me sexually and so that he would eventually leave. He never, I left him in the end.

I want people in my life from now on, who deserve to be there, people who I deserve to have there.

I am going to start praising people in my life more, for even silly things, I want people to feel confident. My OH is amazing and although I do tell him this sometimes, I dont tell him enough, he is my rock.

Further more, I am going to praise myself more. I am going to be nicer to myself.

So if after all my rambling, if you can take anything away from this post, treat your loved ones like they deserve, and treat yourself like you deserve. Let noone run you down, because like me, you have taken a step by starting LT, you are doing something that most people would fail at, and that makes you pretty special and indeed very strong!

Thank you for reading!

You are FAB!

Laura x x x
 
Laura, wow what a thread. I honestly have a lump in my throat after reading that. So inspirational and so well put. You are amazing in coming this far and congratulations on reaching this stage on your journey. You will see this through, I can tell you have the willpower and detmination to succeed.

Thank you so much for your advice and I am just about to ring my hubby and give him the praise he so often does not hear from me as I assume he just knows that I mean to say it.


Your a star.
xxx
 
What a lovely post hun. I felt quite warm inside then to see the positive steps you are taking in your life. You're doing brilliantly, not only with your weight, but with everything else in your life. When you get to the end of this rocky road, all the things you are making right in your life with come together at once, making the new you such a better, happier person! Good luck with everything hun xxxxx
 
Thank you! I see things so differently now, than I did even two months ago!

Life is a real journey, and I hope the best part of my journey is just beginning!

Good Luck on your journey, you are strong enough to achieve all that you want to achieve!

Laura x x x
 
What a brilliant thread, WELL DONE YOU as you say taking on so much and coming out the otherside even more positive. I will tell my DH how much he means to me right now!! thank you. xx
 
See all the love :giggle: :giggle:

I think sometimes we all take life far too seriously and the people who mean the most to us miss out!

Time to get slim and get loving :D :giggle:

Thank you for your replies girls, I am just glad you could take something from me rambling on .

Laura x x x
 
good for you sweetie. bless you.
 
I never meant to make any cry:( you ok honey??:(

The main for me is that the bad times are over and the really good times are beginning!

We are all very lucky, no matter what way you look at it!

I hope your ok honey x x
 
Thanks for that hun, I think its just what I needed today :)
You are an inspiration
Niki
xx
 
GOOD FOR YOU!! You are taking great big strides to get to a happier you and its brilliant. well done! oxoxox
 
Thanks so much Laura, for sharing your innermost thoughts with us.
You've had it hard babe and come through the other side, by your own efforts.
What a contrast to so many people these days, who think the World owes them a living and winge about their plight the whole time.
Thanks for reminding me to tell my loved ones how much I love them, life is so very short and isn't a rehearsal, this is the real thing!
It must have been hard to share with us, so thanks again.
You're a lovely person and deserve to be happy. Bless you. xx
 
I spend most of my time lurking on this forum reading posts to keep my mind and my body out of the kitchen. I have read countless posts but I think that is by far the best.

I also have been through some pretty horendous things in my life and just like you I fell that I have used food to fill a gaping hole or to make myself unattractive because all the male attention I received was unsavoury and disgusting. I felt that by eating I could protect myself, not only with the fat which would make me bigger and sturdier than my natural frame but also by being less desirable.

I have never said any of this before and I thank you for allowing me to share this as I know you understand. I also feel that I am at a crossroads I am sick and tired of hating my body and using it as a barrier I want to share myself and my love. I realise that there are people on this earth who deserve my love, me included and I can't wait till the end of this journey when I can truly look in the mirror and love what I see.

Thank you again, this post wasn't supposed to be about me it was supposed to be about you but I'm only human and I suppose we are all selfish in some way.

Love and hugs. Well done.
 
You are an inspiration and an added bonus on this site I hope I can take a leaf out of your book with your great positivity keep it up.
 
I spend most of my time lurking on this forum reading posts to keep my mind and my body out of the kitchen. I have read countless posts but I think that is by far the best.

I also have been through some pretty horendous things in my life and just like you I fell that I have used food to fill a gaping hole or to make myself unattractive because all the male attention I received was unsavoury and disgusting. I felt that by eating I could protect myself, not only with the fat which would make me bigger and sturdier than my natural frame but also by being less desirable.

I have never said any of this before and I thank you for allowing me to share this as I know you understand. I also feel that I am at a crossroads I am sick and tired of hating my body and using it as a barrier I want to share myself and my love. I realise that there are people on this earth who deserve my love, me included and I can't wait till the end of this journey when I can truly look in the mirror and love what I see.

Thank you again, this post wasn't supposed to be about me it was supposed to be about you but I'm only human and I suppose we are all selfish in some way.

Love and hugs. Well done.


Honey if you need to chat, you can message me in private, I know how hard it is not to have noone to chat too, but I am here if you need to talk at any time x x x
 
Thank you all for your great replies!

I am proud that you could take something from the thread, no matter how small!

Laura x x x
 
Laura you are a beautiful person - and not just on the outside! I am so pleased that your life is now going the way you deserve it to go and I am really looking forward to hearing you have reached your goal.

Last year my older sister was diagnosed with breast cancer - again!!! - and I decided that if she could look at her life positively then I had no excuse not to. Since then I have always been a glass half full type of person rather than a glass half empty person and I have embraced all that life has thrown at me. It has really helped me in situations that previously would had led me to fall apart. Life is so short and we all owe it to ourselves to make the most of it. You have turned a corner in your life and long may you carry on enjoying it!

Praise is something we don't do enough of. I have started to compliment people more, like a very helpful cashier in my local supermarket, I'll even tell the manager how helpful they have been coz we are quick to complain and not praise.

Thank you for your post Laura, you are the sort of person we would all love to have as a friend.

Big hugs babe.

x
 
Aww thank you honey!

I am so sorry to hear about your sister, I hope that she gets better soon. But as you said, most of the time its does take something bad to happen to put life into perspective, it is sad but it is true!

I wish you and your sister all the best of luck x x
 
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