Gem, don't beat yourself up about it, what's done is done and can't be changed. I'm sure you will not want to repeat the way you are feeling now and will make sure it doesn't happen again.
You have been a delight and always cheerful so you CAN do this. Hang in there babe.
I know this isn't the same thing but I dream cheated last night!!!!! I dreamt I ate something, didn't enjoy it and felt really guilty then woke up in a panic thinking I had really done it!!! How stupid is that!!! Hope my stupidity makes you smile!!!! Cheer up Hun.
x