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Dear Diary.....


That mars bar aint love..

Well, I had a really good week (last week) I managed to rack up 12 miles (running) and pretty much ate really good, until Friday came around, In all fairness I did feel pretty sick and just felt the need to eat carby stodge. Im not even going to list what I ate as I a) dont know and B) Dont want to. This continued throughout the weekend. I probably undid all the hard work in the week, I just need to find that balance.

So I had the usual suicidal Sunday where i 'feel' fat. I have a panic and spend tha majority of my sunday night googling various diet plans that swear to leave you looking perfect in 2 hours...I mentioned before that I did the Cambridge diet,lost loads - all went back on. I still sometimes when i have a panic resort back to it just because i feel like I am in control and 'doing something about it'. Well I had a cambridge porrige this morning and have a little shake for lunch but i decided that Im completely missing the point, I need to healthy, Its not healthy for my head to do cambridge, I mean its 10.30 and Im hungry. I also know that It will go back on. So I came on here and decided to write a little diary and hopefully make some friends so that when friday comes I dont fall off the wagon and go mental on the cupcakes!

I just also need to be happy with what I am, that doesnt mean to say I need not bother being the weight i aspire to be, but I just think its important that i dont reject the body I have now and just 'wait' for myself to be 'thin' (Ive been waiting for a long time)

Anyway sorry Ive proper gone on one!!

Just wanted to rant.

Leanne XX:wave_cry:
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