Depression?

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by ELAY, 10 December 2009 Social URL.

  1. ELAY

    ELAY Full Member

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    Just wondering if anyone knows about or has suffered depression?

    I have been feeling desperately low for a few months now and just feel like I can no longer cope with things. I get extremely agitated by the smallest thing and am always shouting at my kids and then I feel really shakey afterwards.

    I am so so lonely and have lost all my friends (we moved house 3 years ago to the countryside and they haven't bothered to make the effort to visit - we live 50 minutes away and I was going down to them once a week, but they never bothered to visit me).

    We had to get rid of our Puppy (german Shepherd) as he bit my Dad accidentally, My Parents then decided to try and sue me but then changed their mind, I then found out I was pregnant and had a miscarriage, had problems afterwards, Went on CD did really well. Got the Flu about 6 weeks ago, put my weight back on. Found loads of texts on OH phone from a girl he works with (young and pretty!) he just said it was nothing and changed the subject (6 texts a day when they sit 10 foot away)! He never even can manage to text me!....

    I'm sorry this is a bit garbled, but I had to get everything down before I cry and
    then can't see!

    It has been such a **** year, but I just don't feel like I can cope anymore!

    Some Help/advise would be appreciated.

    Thank you x
     
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  3. fitz

    fitz Lovin it !!! :)

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    Aww bless your heart - you really sound like you have a lot on your plate @ the moment. Have you spoken to your doctor/nurse about how you feel ?
    I know how it is to feel lonely, have been there many times myself - I posted on here about it once & actually met up with a lady who lived near me at the time. Are there any clubs you could join or hobbies you enjoy ? I understand it is hard to feel motivated when you are feeling low but things will improve & get better - keep your chin up, we are all here to listen if ever you want to sound off x
     
  4. Fattack

    Fattack Likes to eat

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    oh hun if you lived anywhere near me i'd take you out for a coffee and a chat!

    i know what it's like to feel really low, but you're still here, you're fighting, and you're doing ever so well on Cambridge too! things will pick up, and hey, next year is a new year right?

    sca-rew 2009, it was rubbish! bring on 2010!
     
  5. mrsessex

    mrsessex Gold Member

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    Elay... where are you in Essex?
    x
     
  6. ELAY

    ELAY Full Member

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    Thanks everyone. I think I just need to talk all this through with some professional perhaps!?

    I'm near Maldon.
     
  7. redpetal

    redpetal New Member

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    Really hope you feel better soon x
     
  8. Fattack

    Fattack Likes to eat

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    Talking to a professional can really help hun, especially if you're lonely. Sometimes that ear can make all the difference.
     
  9. Loser85

    Loser85 Gold Member

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    Hiya i know what you re going through. Similiar thing really, i moved up to scotland to be with my now fiance away from everyone i know. My friends dont really bother anymore and i speak to my mum twice a week on the phone. I got so lonely, couldnt find a job, was scared to answer the door if someone knocked or if the phone rang. Anyways a while ater this i fell pregnant which at 1st helped but once my wee girl was born it all came right back. I was a state, willing to hurt myself and dd. Not like this anymore thank christ but it was bad. Go see you doc, i did. I finished my anti - depressants end of july. Cant say im perfect now but im a damn sight better. See your doc hunny, its not worth putting it off. Hugs to you xxxxx
     
  10. RoeiiRevive

    RoeiiRevive Member

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    Hey so sorry to hear ur feeling so blue i know how you feel.
    I suffer from depression and have only recently stopped taking my medication even though im still depressed. Maybe try therapy or see your gp about getting anti depressants?

    Aged 19.
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    5'5
     
  11. Dancing

    Dancing Gold Member

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    i've just started counselling as I was displaying your symptoms and a few more. I'd tried counselling once before but just did not jel will the counsellor. I love this one and it helps so much.
    Something to think about though. Definitely the first stop, should be your GP. They have a 10 question simple form to assess your level of depression (if any). Take small steps. Start with speaking with your GP. If counselling is offered. Take it. BUT you must say if you don't feel comfortable with the counsellor and try to get changed. It is a really important aspect ... that you have a good relationship with them.
     
  12. MinnieMel

    MinnieMel Why Be Normal?

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    Hi Elay,

    It sounds as if you have gotten some very sound advice (esp, about seeing your GP and a counsellor). You are not alone, so many people feel the way you do. This time of year does not help either -- so much pressure to be "happy".

    I know so well (being a military brat and now an ex-pat wife) that moving away is so hard and having to start over is miserable. Also, when you move following the man's job -- his life doesn't really change: he goes to work, he has co-workers and adult contact, he has a feeling of self-worth through his job, a set routine... etc. So, he doesn't get it at all. The woman has to find schools, doctors, kids' activities, where to shop, sort the home, and never mind make social contacts and find employment (usually underemployment).

    I know that you are hurt by your friends not coming the other way, but they still have all their other life contacts in their area -- it is not mutually beneficial for them to travel to you. Sad but true, and it is human nature.

    It is easier said than done, but make some new friends -- join a fitness class, take up a hobby, volunteer at your children's school or clubs, etc.

    And, I have no idea what to say about parents and the dog situation "It beggars belief." What kind of parents threaten to sue their own child? I am so sorry that this happened.

    However, can you get a smaller, more docile type of dog? Then you could go to puppy/dog training classes and meet some people there. Plus, having that other heartbeat in the house with you when you are alone is such a comfort. I love my little Yorkie... and I am not a dog person.

    And, about your husband -- you have spoken with him and he has not changed his behaviour. This is definately a situation that can use professional counselling support. If the counsellor recommends and you have given it a lot of thought -- you might considered sharing your feelings with the young woman. She may have no idea that this is anything more than work fun, and would be mortified to know that you are distressed. But, do not act on my advice -- I do not know how your husband would feel about you talking to her. It could make things more difficult between you two.

    My best to you -- keep us posted.

    Sincerely,

    MinnieMel
     
    Last edited: 14 December 2009
  13. ELAY

    ELAY Full Member

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    Thank you so much for all your wonderful advice. I really do appreciate it.

    Thank you MinnieMel, everything you have said is dead on! You should be my therapist!!!! :)

    I am going to try and get someone I can talk to and hopefully 2010 will be a much better year!

    xx
     
  14. MinnieMel

    MinnieMel Why Be Normal?

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    Dear Elay,

    I feel confident that it will be -- making the decision to act (i.e. enpowering yourself) is the first step towards making things work for you.

    Please keep us posted -- and as Scarlett O'Hara would say, "Tomorrow is another day."

    MM
     
  15. Blingbabe

    Blingbabe Back On Track!

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    Hi Elay

    I have been catching up with posts as I have been off CD for a few weeks, I just couldn't ignore your post or not reply. MinnieMel and everyone else have posted such lovely and helpful replies, I do hope that life gets better for you. I didn't think of myself as being in any way despondent or depressed before CD - however, I found that losing weight has helped me cope with greater ease with stresses at work etc and made me feel happier in general, so hopefully this will be the case for you. Wishing you all the best x
     
  16. MinnieMel

    MinnieMel Why Be Normal?

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    Hi BB,

    I agree with you -- my weight is something that I can work to control and when I am doing this it comforts me with regards to the things that seemed to be out of my control. I hope that we can help with your weight loss Elay and also support you on working things out.

    MM
     
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