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Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by sweetchant1lly, 16 June 2010 Social URL.

  1. sweetchant1lly

    sweetchant1lly Here we go again ..

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    god guys i dont know what to do my life at home has fallen apart i dont know what is happening with my realtionship at mo and everything seems pretty crap .

    i didnt make weigh in last night havent eaten properly for a few days and just dont know what to do.

    i did make the effort to go buy sw friendly food yesterday in a bid to try and have control over something in my life.. but i just dont feel like eating i feel sick and shakey and just generally confused with life at the moment ..

    sorry for the rant i dont really even know why im posting it but just felt i needed to if that makes sence
     
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  3. Karen

    Karen Serial Foodie!

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    sweet, im sorry to hear thigns aren't great at the moment - life can seem so unfair. i think you hit the nail though... by sorting shopping for SW and getting control of your weight - you would feel better. By choosing to not do that it is almost as if you are punishing yourself while other things aren't going so well. you need lots of love and kindness for yourself, especially when you are going through messy relationship issues. Have a bit of a pamper and a stern word or two with yourself as your health and your relationship with yourself is far more important than any relationship you have with someone else hun xxx
     
  4. MancBird

    MancBird Always comes back to MMs!

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    Don't apologise... that's what we are here for!

    It's a sad fact that sometimes life gets in the way, making taking good care of yourself difficult - but please try and eat something, even if only a couple of mullerlight yogs or some HEB ryvita or HEB toast, something to take the edge off the shaky feeling?

    I agree with Karen, a bit of you time and some pampering might make you feel a bit better. Let us all know how you're getting on xxxxxx
     
  5. Alia

    Alia Silver Member

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    Sweet hunney plz don't appologise that is what we are all here for to love and support each other along our weightloss journey and that help is not exclusively for the actually weightloss plan its for everything to do with us and our lives.

    I'm sorry that you are having such a bad run at the moment. I'm not sure if its the same with you but I have found many instances, my own included where wives/girlfriends have started on a weightloss programme and started to lose weight and suddenly the husband or partner find themselves in unknown territory and start to feel so very insecure which can cause problems in the relationship.

    In my first marriage after I'd had my second set of twins I decided that I was going to finally do something about my weight and joined SW for the very first time. After I'd lost a couple of stone my marriage went right on the rocks - I'd started to take an interest in myself, how I looked, started feeling good enough to go get my hair done, wear make up and so on - my husband could n't deal with that and actually left. I continued with the programme and lost just over 6 stone, long story short - he came back, the first night home he cooked a really deliscious rich meal and I was off programme, stopped going to class, put all the weight back on and some bla bla bla - incidently we divorced a year or so later.

    Personally I'd say to you that no matter what happens keep going to group even if its just to weigh and run so you can keep track of what is going on and if you go to group you are more likely to get back on track once things settle down. It's stopping going that leads to the inevitable and before we all know it the weight is back on plus more.

    Plz feel free to rant a way, thats what we are here for hunney xxx
     
  6. Gettingthinnerbytheday

    Gettingthinnerbytheday Gold Member

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    Oh hun, sounds tough right now!!

    It can help loads sometimes just writing things down, so maybe that's the 1st step taken care of.

    Do you have friends at your group that maybe can support you at the mo? Or are you able to have a chat to your Consultant so she's in the picture??

    x x
     
  7. Happytigger

    Happytigger Full Member

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    Dont apologise, we all SO need to rant, life can be pants and so get in the way. But if we can take control of one part (say the weightloss situ) and then it takes away some of the stress of other things going on and it can make you feel better..

    I hope that tomorrow will be a better day. :)
     
    Last edited: 16 June 2010
  8. Piglet1977

    Piglet1977 Full Member

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    Can not say anything that has not been send
    Sending u HUGE hugs
     
  9. elizabeth

    elizabeth Silver Member

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    Hope things improve soon sweetheart. It's not surprising you don't want to eat if you're terribly upset, that's a pretty normal response I think. Your appetite will come back when you've had time to process the emotional stuff.
     
  10. zofia

    zofia Full Member

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    hun i feel for you, i really do.

    my husband came home one day in february and had sorted everything for leaving me, he was just kind enough to pop in from work to inform me of the pending split/divorce.
    my world was upside down and in pieces, i didnt know what to think say or do, i just seen 16 years of marriage crumbled into pieces in front of me.
    i am a comfort eater, so hit the food big style.
    a few days later he came back we talked a lot and worked things out.
    i have since made the choice to start sw and stop smoking, and i have my good and my bad days, depending on stress level, dont write yourself off on loosing weight, just take a day or two of time out, and start fresh once you feel strong enough to take control.
     
  11. kasiapelasia

    kasiapelasia Full Member

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    Hey chicken,
    I know how you feel :lost: and what you need- :needhug:

    there is one ( )

    take some time to think:thinking2: ,

    pamper yourself :princess:,

    have good oldfashion :cry:

    and try to :eat: something!!!

    Sometimes life is a very unfair but also lifes brings us so many good things, try to think about those and do not give up!!!!
     
  12. louisedan

    louisedan Gold Member

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    put yourself first for a change.I know the weight loss is important but sometimes others things can be more important.Just try not to pig or hit the bottle but remember we are all here for you on ther boards or if you want to mail x
     
  13. Kenco

    Kenco Gold Member

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    Hey hun sorry to hear things are not great for you at the moment.Life can be unfair.
    Don't apologize that's what is so good about the forum so many people to help and offer support to each other.good for you by going and getting some shopping to do your sw plan.x
     
  14. sweetchant1lly

    sweetchant1lly Here we go again ..

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    hi guys sorry i havent been here for a few days things are just really tough at mo ...apparantly he thinks the dinamics in our realtionship have changed since my eldest came back home full time (he had been spending a lot of time at his nans) By the dynamics changing i think he actually means he feels he isnt getting enough attention, i think when he bolted last week he thought i would run straight after him and i didnt as there are other factors in this breakup witch meant i needed to deal with children first. He ran back home to his mummy for a few days and now allthough he is back he is distant in his texts and refused to come see me yesterday to talk things throug even though i explained thats what i needed as i didt have the kids last night or today so it meant i could have some time to fall to pieces today befor they came home ...he siad no he would come monday but please could i take his laptop and stuff to his flat as he needs it urgently...God he is so selfish, self obssessed and thinks only of his self so why the hell do i love him so so much .
    My kids at mo think he has gone away for a few days as he hasnt been well but god knows what im going to tell them after he collects his stuff ..

    they have been hurt one to many times by men i have fallen for and stupidly trusted them with my heart and my childrens.

    people keep teling me im strong ad i get through it but i dont want to be strong i want someone to be strong for me for a change but it seems as if i spend my whole life caring for others and getting nothing back in return .

    Thank you all so much for taking the time to respond and for your wishes ...food wise im still strugiling to eat at mo but am trying my best ..class wise i want to go back but im not looking forward to faceing the questions of where is dave it was only two weeks ago we were tellling them that we wanted to lose weight together for our wedding .
     
  15. Karen

    Karen Serial Foodie!

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    you have nothing to feel bad about and i certainly would not protect him. i'd be straight with the kids and the class as you have done nothing wrong. what kind of a man expect to be put ahead or on equal consideration as your children? i think that is utterly disgusting and you should be glad to be rid. sorry if that sounds harsh i just think you need to show him that you respect yourself and your kids, even if he doesn't xxx
     
  16. sweetchant1lly

    sweetchant1lly Here we go again ..

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    thanks karen and no it doesnt sound harsh hun ..i know your right he admitited today to being jealous of the kids and wanting all the attention for himself that he is finding life to hard and needs to be on his own he says he is selfish and none of this is my fault still doesnt stop it hurting though
     
  17. Karen

    Karen Serial Foodie!

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    awww hun... i know it always hurts... especially when it is not our choice. be really kind to yourself and go through everything you need to as it will help you in the long term. its not nice to see anyone go through this but eventually you will be glad to be free of that kind of selfishness. its just all that painful stuff before then that sucks. we are all here for you though. xx lots of love and hugs to you. xxxx
     
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  19. donnajt

    donnajt Addicted to Minimins!

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    Sending you a big (((HUG))), nothing else I can say, that the others haven't already been said, with love x
     
  20. Kenco

    Kenco Gold Member

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    Hi hun sending you:hug99:.stay strong.xx
     
  21. sweetchant1lly

    sweetchant1lly Here we go again ..

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    thanks everyone your support has been really helpfull
     
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