Emily's Diary - Back on the restart wagon again!

[emily87]

Thurs 10th June - Red day:

Breakfast: 42g Allbran (HexB) with Milk (HexA)

Lunch: Salad (Lettuce, Cucumber, Beetroot) with 3 chicken drumsticks and 1/2 tin of tuna, 4tsp extra light mayo (2syns)

Dinner: 4 BBQ chicken kebabs (4 syns)

Snacks: 1x Fibre plus bar (HeB)
Grapes
2x Weight watchers yogurts
4x softmints (2 syns)

Total syns = 8 syns

Exercise = 30 mins exercise bike, 30 mins walking the dog.

 

[emily87]

Fri 11th June - Red day:

Breakfast: 42g Allbran (HexB) with Milk (HexA)

Lunch: Chicken slices
Weight watchers yogurt
Slice of carrot cake (unsure of syns so will guess about 20 syns)

Dinner: Turkey pesto roast with veggies
Strawberries, raspberries and grapes with syn free ice cream

Snacks: 1x Fibre plus bar (HeB)

Total syns = 20 syns

Exercise = 30 mins exercise bike

Hubby came home from his course with a slice of carrot cake for me today. This is a very rare occurence and therefore thought it rude not to eat it, hehe. I'm guessing about 20 syns, but I didn't have any other syns today and have been mostly good with syns all week.

 

[emily87]

Saturday 12th June - Extra Easy day:

Breakfast: 42g Allbran (HexB) with Milk (HexA)

Lunch: Salad (Lettuce, Cucumber, Beetroot) with 3 chicken drumsticks and 1/2 tin of tuna, 3tsp extra light mayo (1.5 syns)

Dinner: Sweet and sour chicken with rice

Snacks: Syn free ice cream with strawberries and raspberries
1 packet walkers crisps (6.5 syns)
10 haribo sweets (7.5 syns)
1x fibre plus bar (5.5 syns)

Total syns = 21 syns

Exercise = 30 mins exercise bike

Started today as a red day so I had my fibre plus bar as my second HeB, then I decided I wanted some rice with my dinner so it turned out to be an Extra Easy, first one I've ever done! Over on the syns again today, its been a bad day

 

[emily87]

Sunday 13th June - Red day:

Breakfast: 42g Allbran (HexB) with Milk (HexA)

Lunch: Salad (Lettuce, Cucumber, Beetroot) with 3 chicken drumsticks and 1/2 tin of tuna, 3tsp extra light mayo (1.5 syns)

Dinner: Meatballs in tomato sauce

Snacks: Syn free ice cream with grapes
2x Fibre plus bars (HeB and 5.5 syns)
Belgian waffle!! (6 syns)
Blackcurrant sweets (6 syns)

Total syns = 19 syns

Exercise = 30 mins walking the dog.

This had been a totally pants weekend. I've been feeling rubbish and irritable and snappy all weekend and I don't know why. And I've just wanted to eat any and everything I could get my hands on. I had to force myself to cook dinner each night as I just wanted to give in and get a takeaway. To which my husband said ok lets get one, which didn't help! Its ever since he brought me that carrot cake on Friday, its just completely thrown me off balance. Anyway, so hence the high syns all weekend. I managed to avoid the takeaways which would have been catastrophic but I found some sweets instead. And today I swear I could have eaten a mountain of Fibre plus bars. Couldn't bring myself to go on the exercise bike today either so just took the dog for a walk.

 

[emily87]

I'm ready to give up now. This diet clearly isn't working for me and I'm gutted! I have stayed the same this week and I just don't understand. Yes, I had a bit of a bum weekend but its not like a stuffed my face and I wouldn't have thought it would be enough to counteract the he hard work I put in throughout the rest of the week. I only lost 1lb last week which gave me a bit of a knock too but this is the last straw.
I was upset last week because with a 1lb weight loss it meant I wasn't likely to be able to reach my goal of 11st 6 (the lowest I have got down to) in time for my birthday (16th June), but I posted on here and people were really supportive and made me see that maybe setting targets like this isn't helpful. So with that in mind I had a look at my weight loss and noticed that all I had to do was lose another lb this week and I would get my 2stone award, which I was happy with, a nice birthday prezzie. But no, I've stayed the same.

I am at a complete loss as to what to do from now. My plan for this week was to not really celebrate my birthday on Wednesday but wait till the weekend when I go to my parents for a joint birthday celebration with my Mum and family. We are going out for a meal on Saturday night, when I would choose a good healthy option, then all other meals would be the same as my usual until tea time on Sunday when we are having cake and party food. Then I would treat myself. Now with having lost no weight, I don't feel like I can do that. I either want to give up or be so so strict with myself and not let anything bad pass my lips.
Also we spend a lot more money on food every week now because I'm trying to cook more and make lots of new recipes so we don't get bored eating the same thing over and over, which is what has happened in the past. So if Slimming World isn't working, I'm wasting and awful lot of money which we don't really have

I know it sounds stupid but I'm sat here crying coz I just don't know what to do. :'(

 

[Tatws]

oh Hun dont give up, you have had an iffy week it happens but you are 26lbs gone and it isnt coming back again. I have read your diary with interest as I only do EE ( only been doing it 12 days mind but it seems to be working for me). One of the ladies who started the team I joined Queen sized to Princess sized plans her meals a week in advance and has been doing EE and then red weeks. Would that help? She is also addicted to wii sports and so everyone who has one also seems to be on them trying out new games etc. Her screen name is Capricorn and she is a real inspiration to me although I havent told her yet.
Dont give up, have a think and a plan and remember you can do this and you know that it works.

 

[emily87]

Thank you for your post Tatws The meal planning sounds like a really good idea. I had kind of been doing that but not very strictly and only for dinner times. I do my shopping weekly so I would think what dinner meals I was going to do that week and then just buy the ingredients and make whatever I felt like each day. So, maybe if I know exactly what I'm going to eat every day that might help, and might help me stick to it as well. Some nights I just cant be bothered trying to think of something to make I love the Wii as well, haven't been on it for aaaages, so definitely want to get that out again. Might see if there are any new games for the balance board that look like fun.

I have decided I'm going to have a week off of sorts. I'm not going to go crazy and have takeaways all the time and eat whole bars of chocolate, but I'm not going to be too strict with myself either. Its my birthday tomorrow so I want to enjoy a bit of cake without worrying how many syns it is. Then this weekend I am going up to my parents for bithday celebrations and fathers day (its my mums birthday on Sunday). So we are going out for a meal on Saturday night (I will choose a healthy-ish option). Then on Sunday we are having a BBQ for lunch and then birthday tea, party food etc (its a bit of a family tradition ) and cupcakes. Yum yum. I'm very excited, cant wait! arty0011: So healthy options but not worrying too much about what I eat, so long as I don't go overboard (my Mum is going to keep an eye on me, hehe), then back on plan on Monday.

I'm hoping that having a week off might help kick start my weightloss again as well, as I seem to have come to a bit of a standstill.

 

[Tatws]

Sound like a plan, everyone needs a holiday from it occasionally. Enjoy yourself you have earned it 26lbs is not to be sniffed at and you are over the half way point, too far to give up now!

 

[emily87]

Woohoo, it's my birthday! In work all day unfortunately but there is a cupcake (or two!) with my name on it so its not too bad, hehe. Looking forward to celebrating at the weekend with my family

 

[Tatws]

Happy Birthday, enjoy it.

 

[emily87]

Argh!! I know I said I was going to have a week off this week but I feel so guilty. I'm just so worried I'm going to pile on the pounds in just a few days and be back at square one again. I'm not eating really badly but I just feel anything that passes my lips that isn't 'free' is going to suddenly make me the size of a house! I enjoyed my birthday yesterday but I went to bed feeling bad and guilty. I had my normal breakfast and lunch, and then had a cupcake and some mini caramel shortcake bites, so those were my treats. Then for dinner I had pasta with a sauce that I used to make (pre slimming world). Its basically a white sauce (flora, flour and milk) with tuna and sweetcorn. I dread to think how many syns that would be, but I didn't have as much as I would have done in the past and it was much better than getting a takeaway which I very nearly gave into.

So basically I want to have a week off plan, but I don't want to pile back on the pounds, because they have been so hard to lose already. Hmm, dilemma. I'm going to try and be a bit stricter on myself today and tomorrow, before the weekend begins. Just wish I could switch my brain off and not care too much, and just face whatever the gain is on Monday. Why does it have to be so much easier to gain lbs than it is to lose them, lol.

Anyway, moan over. Another lovely sunny day in the office!

 

[emily87]

Hi all,

I'm back from my fab birthday weekend at my parents. Full of cake and yummy food and ready and rearing to get back on plan and shift these pounds! We will see how long it lasts, lol.

I've decided to change my weigh in day to Tuesday from now on, so will hop on the scales tomorrow morning to see how much damage has been done, eek. It is inevitable that I will have gained after my week off plan but hopefully it wont be tooo much, and I wont get down about it because I had a lovely time

So back on track today. Im going to struggle with the exercise today as my hayfever is in overdrive, which is horrible. But hey ho, I'll see what I can do. Need to go shopping for some fruit, veg and free foods later, to stock up my fridge. Just hope having a week off plan will help boost my weight loss. Fingers crossed. :fingerscrossed:

 

[Tatws]

hows it going? I went to Guide camp over the weekend and just pigged out so Im avoiding the scales til next week!

 

[emily87]

Today went ok, I think. I didn't eat huge amounts at the weekend but seemed to be grazing most of the time, so I need to get the urge to 'graze' out of my head, which will probably take a couple of days. I'm going to brave the scales tomorrow morning and see what the damage is. Not really sure what to expect so we will see, just got to suck it up and move on.

Today was a red day, and I had:

B - Allbran (HeB) and milk (HeA)

L - Tomato soup
1x Jacobs cream cracker (1.5 syns), they were just on the side in work and it somehow ended up in my mouth, hehe.
3x slices ham

Snack - 2x alpen light bars
1x Shape greek style yogurt, orange (3 syns) (thought they were free when I bought them today, boohoo, oh well only got 4 so will eat them up then probably not get any more, they are quite nice though)
Bowl of grapes
Brioche roll (6.5 syns)

D - Salmon with steamed veggies

Total = 11 syns

The brioche was a bit of a nasty suprise. Hubby bought them while we were shopping and I had one in the car on the way home thinking they wouldn't be too highly synned. Oh dear. He's eaten them all now so thats ok, lol. So higher on the syns than I would have liked ideally (I'm planning to try and stay as close to 5 a day as I can), but I think that is due to the bad habits at the weekend. So aiming for 5 tomorrow. Also no exercise as I was working all day and then seemed to spend most of the evening in the supermarket, making dinner and washing up. So need to get on that exercise bike again tomorrow.

 

[emily87]

Just spent aaaaages uploading a few photos of myself and some meals I've made. I don't really have many photos of myself because I never let anyone take my photo becuase I'm ashamed of the way I look so its quite a big step putting them up, but hopefully I will be able to see some differences eventually. Off to bed now, yawn, night all.

 

[emily87]

Oops, weighed myself this morning and its a 3lb gain for my naughtyness at the weekend. Just going to draw a line under it and move on. Hopefully I can lose a bit this week if I stick to it 100%. And now my birthday is over and done with I don't have any more 'distractions' until Christmas so touch wood I can get rid of these 26 remaining lbs. I just seem to be stuck between 11st 9 and 12st at the moment, so hopefully I can break that. Would love to get my 2st award at 11st 8 and then to reach 11 and a half stone. Just need to take each day and week as it comes. And hope I don't lose faith and motivation!!

 

[emily87]

Well, I'm really upset and annoyed with myself at the moment, which is probably why I haven't posted for a couple of days.

Basically I am really struggling to get back on plan again after my 'week off' and birthday weekend. I don't know what happens to me. I wake up every morning feeling really positive and with all the best intentions for a 100% day, then during the day at work I think about what good food I'm going to have in the evening (fruit, healthy dinner etc.). But then as soon as I get home it all goes out the window! I just grab all sorts and munch away. And I think to myself, ah go for it I'll start back again tomorrow. Then when it gets late, like now, and I'm ready for bed I feel really guilty and hate myself for pigging out when I probably wasn't even hungry. It just seems to be a vicious circle at the moment and I don't understand why I do it!!

I don't want to give up because I want to lose weight so so badly and I hate my body. But I think what is putting me off is the fact that even when I had 100% weeks I only lost like 0.5lbs or 1lb, and I was gutted. So I just kinda think what is the point putting in all that effort if its not going to work. Stupid I know because a loss is a loss and if I stuck at it I would eventually reach target, but I cant carry on with such small losses, its completely demoralising.

So stuck in a rut right now, once again. Fed up with being fat and overweight and just want to be back to the old, more confident and most of all happy me that I was when I was at the weight I was when I got married. :wave_cry:

 

[emmaleonie1984]

Hi emily, im sending you hugs! im exactly the same, everyday i wake up and think 100% today, not going to cheat but then something happens and i go off plan. Some people find it so easy then other people like me find it hard lol. Draw a line under your birthday week..you are entitled to have some fun..life is to short! You will loose the weight and feel good about yourself!!! Chin up hun..
x

 

[Tatws]

big hugs!! Have you thought about starting the week with 105 syns (15x7) and then if you have a blow out you have it covered. I know its not the proper way but some ladies here do it and it works for them. Perhaps try and use 10 syns a day so you dont feel deprived.?

 

[emily87]

Last week was a bit of a disaster and ended up eating far too much junk including McDonalds! I could give a whole load of excuses but at the end of the day its my own fault. I weighed this morning and I'm back up to 12stone again. Bit gutted but I think/hope I've had a bit of a motivational kick. Its mine and my husbands 5 year wedding anniversary in November and I would love to reach target (or get as close as I can to it) by then because that is the weight I was when we got married. So I'm looking at wedding photos and might even get the old wedding video out to watch as motivation. Fingers crossed I can do it this time.

Going to go and make some stewed Rhubard now. Yum yum.