Feeling guilty and jealous......

Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by RScothern, 22 September 2011 Social URL.

  1. RScothern

    RScothern Full Member

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    WARNING SELF INDULGENT MOAN!!!!!

    I started my journey a year ago an have lost almost 3 and a half stone BUT I joined with a friend and they have lost 8 stone in the same time. I am sooooo jealous but I know they have worked really hard and I feel guilty for feeling jealous. It's even at the point where I feel as though I will never get to target as I still have 4 stone to go.
    I need to give myself a big kick up the bum and find my motivation again but all I want to do is eat galaxy and cry :(
    Sorry rant over think I have pmt an I just needed to vent a bit. X
     
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  3. Stringerbelle

    Stringerbelle Member

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    I don't think you should allow yourself to feel guilty as long as your friend doesn't see your jealousy. You are only human, after all.
    What I would do (put down the galaxy), is try and look at your friend's acheivements as not something you should measure your own negatively against, but rather something to aspire to.
    When you say your friend has worked really hard, are they doing things that you are not? Exercising more? Sticking to the plan more closely. If there is anything you can identify, well.. do that. If there isn't.. I'll help you move the body?

    The sad fact is, that all bodies work differently, and there has been a spate of 'oh, I haven't done as well as other people' threads lately. You can only really do what you can do. And by the way, getting the amount you have off has really inspired me. I have over 6 stone to lose and to be three stone lighter will make me feel much better.
    So take a deep breath, be proud of your acheivements and stop beating yourself up because I bet everyone else you know is dead impressed :)
    And put down the galaxy.
     
    gl12282 likes this.
  4. xMandyDx

    xMandyDx Determination is Key

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    I agree, put the Galaxy down. It won't taste nice anyway if it's all soggy and teary ;)
    Chin up, you'll get there - you're just taking the more scenic route.
     
  5. LessofLou

    LessofLou Full Member

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    I do find with SW the amount you lose is directly related to how closely you stick to the plan.

    We all know members who dont weigh/measure their HEs, or substitute other items for them. People who give theirself a treat day every week, people who dont count or who regularly exceed their syns.

    Why not re read your book and give yourself a plan for the week ahead to be 100% by the book - if you have found that you have wandered off the path just lately??

    If none of the above applies just accept that your body behaves differently to your friends and focus on your fantastic weight loss to date!!. You have already proved to yourself you CAN do this....you just need to keep on keeping on and your day WILL come!!!!
     
  6. jockiejoe

    jockiejoe Wanting Is The Key

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    ppl need to realise, that whilst there are various food plans which aid weight loss. But its important to realise that we are all different n will lose at different rates. Best to a la carte your plan to what works for YOU. Keep focussed YOU will arrive where YOU wants to be, the arrival time depends on YOU
     
  7. Funky_Munky

    Funky_Munky Put the kettle on

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    Just to reiterate whats said above, dont compare yourself to other people as it will only bring you down. To quote that baz lurman song - the race is long and its only with yourself.

    If your friendship is close enough, I dont think there is any harm in telling them how your feeling about it all. Tell them youre struggling at the moment, and ask them for some moral support or advice what they would do in a similar situation. Youve both done amazingly well and its good you have each other to fall back on.
     
  8. RScothern

    RScothern Full Member

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    Thankyou all for your replies. I DID put the galaxy down and instead had a hot chocolate options.
    My friend allows himself a treat day every week whereas I have a treat meal but that's usually just having something like a pub meal ( usually veggie chilli and jp at wetherspoons!) I also walk to and from school 3 times a day and do 5 hour long aerobics sessions a week. Maybe I need to go back to basics and clear my head a bit. Think I will start keeping a food diary on here too and see if that helps
    Thanks again for your support x
     
  9. WelshJojo

    WelshJojo Gold Member

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    Have just read your post, and presuming(possibly wrongly) that you are female, one reason your friend may have lost weight quicker is the fact they are male-something you have only mentioned in this last post! Men always lose weight quicker than women :) HTH

    http://www.minimins.com/slimming-world-weight-loss-diary/187905-jos-journey-infinity-beyond.html
     
  10. kingleds

    kingleds Gold Member

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    What she said!!
    Plus - veg chiil & jp at weatherspoons is nit a treat! Its free - unless you drenching it in butter. Are you using your syns at all?
     
  11. hellcats

    hellcats Full Member

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    chin up babes. I see we have similar weights and can relate to the I want to lose weight and want to lose it NOW but we didn't put it on overnight so it won't go overnight (unfortunately) so just a hang on in there. xx
     
  12. lardylady

    lardylady Gold Member

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    If only that were true! Since joining mid August, I've lost 11lb. I've had 3 losses of 2lb, one loss of 5lb (not my first WI) and a STS. I have been 100% every day. When I had the STS, I couldn't honestly say why I hadn't lost. In the past when I've done SW, I've also put the odd pound on despite being 100%. In my case, I just have to accept that if I stick to SW 100%, then eventually I will get to my target weight, even though I may not lose every week.
     
  13. beckyblue

    beckyblue Silver Member

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    I have been struggeling to lose weight since birth! My freind has always been big, she was 27 stone to my 22, I didn't see her for 6 months and in that time she had lost 8 stone (she doesn't eat and has put herself on a restrictive diet of 600 cals a day) she is now 15 stones and I'm 19.7 and I eat very well on my SW plan but I still find myself jealous of her sucess and of how good she looks. All she speaks about is her diet and asks how my diet is and how she admires me for TRYING. But while she has no social life, argues with her oh coz she's grumpy through lack of food, I have a great social life and enjoy cookin for my oh and going for meals out (while sticking to the plan) x
     
  14. Shirleen

    Shirleen Gold Member

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    There's a saying in Christian circles, "don't envy what others have unless you are related to go through what they went through to get it"
     
  15. kingleds

    kingleds Gold Member

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    Not a religous person, but this rings true with me. The girl in my group who routinely looses 4lb a week never does ANYTHING except look after her toddler. She doesn't go out, she rarely uses any syns & was absolutely convinced she would gain the week she went to harvester & had the simply chicken.

    Life is TOO short!
     
  16. ilovecabbage

    ilovecabbage Member

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    yup, life is for living
     
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