Fibromyalgia and Memory Loss

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by Blonde Logic, 30 July 2009 Social URL.

  1. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Hi

    I have FM, and I hate it. Things hurt constantly....but the worst part of it is how it affects my memory, particularly my short term memory.

    It is affecting me at work now, in that there is a woman there who gets very cross if I can't "snap" out an answer immediatly about whether or not I dealt with a particular client, and if so when, and where is the paperwork, etc. I just don;t know at the moment she asks me, I honestly cannot remember. I feel pressured by her, and say "No, wasn;t me - doesnt ring a bell, etc." Because she demands an answer, etc., and then late I find that I DID deal with it - I just could not recall the info on the spot.

    Its very frustrating, and truly make me doubt myeself many many times.

    I feel I need to say something to her, and I am feeling emotional about it. I can't help it, and I hate it, and it is so new to me not to be able to recall every detail from every situation like I used to be able too.

    I don;t know if I would be better off talking to her directly, or to my mananger.

    Its such a small office, I feel I should go stratigh to the women herself. But I rather feel it will fall on deaf ears.

    I don;t really know what to do, but its hurtful that she gets so angry and makes me feel like a numpty when I clearly am not. Ya know??

    Does anyone else out there have the misfortune of suffering from FM, and if so - how do you find your memory, and how doyou cope? It gets to me sometimes.

    To demonstrate how bad it is - for months I have been waiting for my followup visit with my specialist after a series of tests - and I couldn;t wait to talk to him about my memory loss as its a great concern. And what did I do? I forgot to bring up the issue. Almost laughable, but not when its me - makes me so mad at myself!:cry:

    Any ideas anyone? :eek:
     
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  3. Jo B

    Jo B Full Member

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    Can't help with the FM bit but you have my sympathies, it sounds awful.
    As regards the lady at work, I would definitely speak to her directly first - then if that doesn't help/work I would speak to your manager. I like to work on the principal that people don't know they are doing something wrong until they are told, give her the opportunity to fix it first and then if she doesn't, escalate it. She shouldn't be making you feel bad/stressed about not remembering things straight away. Good luck with it, it's never nice having to give someone direct feedback
     
  4. helenn

    helenn Full Member

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    I agree with Jo in talking the the lady first as she doen't know what she doesn't know and may be more receptive when she realises.

    I would also want to go to her with some suggestions as to how she can change how she asks you for information, as most people can acknowledge a problem and maybe feel sorry for you, but continue to treat you in the same way.

    Could you ask her to email requests for info to give you time to check or maybe you can think of some other strategy that would help. The thing to think about is some way of not putting you on the spot, where you have to give an instant answer.
     
  5. roundrachel

    roundrachel Silver Member

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    Hi BL. I don't suffer from FM but following my glandular fever in Feb I've had inflammation and swelling of my brain which means I'm not quite as quick off the mark as I'd like to be. I get my words muddled and have difficulty writing sometimes too. Obviously it's affecting my work but I've told the people I work closely with and they seem to be a bit more patient with me. I'm not sure what they'd think of me if I hadn't told them. I tell other people on a need to know basis (eg, when I've forgotten something they told me five mins previously). Sometimes I'm sure it's just that I'm forgetful though.

    I think you should tell the lady in question and hopefully she'll give you a bit more breathing space and time to think. I find that so long as I don't use it as an excuse for all mistakes (because I do sometimes just make mistakes...I'm human after all!) then people are fine.

    Hopefully my memory and neurology will get back to normal in the coming months. I don't know what I'll have to say when I forget a deadline then!!

    All the best and keep smiling xxx
     
  6. Blonde Logic

    Blonde Logic Yes. You can.

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    Thanks ladies

    I did come in early to speak to her but everyone was here already, so I sent her an email.

    She nodded and said she'd spek to me later.

    Its such a frustrating thing, it will be good that they know.

    Thanks!!

    And I always keep smilin! :D
     
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