Gender split & motivations for loss

[Dominoid]

I can't help noticing that there's a far greater number of Ladies than there are Gentlemen on this site and although it's a lovely place to be, I do feel a little bit of a minority! With not everyone having an avatar, it might be more even than I think of course, but it seems to be a general thing that every woman I know is trying to lose weight and nowhere near as many men.

It's got me wondering though, what is it that makes women more inclined to control their weight then men? It seems to me that there's just as much peer pressure from the media with people like David Beckham and Peter Andre branded about everywhere with their torsos out but it just doesn't seem to affect my gender so much. Indeed I'd be likely to mock those two that I've picked out at random because, although I'd quite like their phisique, they've never come across as the sharpest tools in the shed and as such, I don't really want to be "like them" as it were.
So what's the difference? Do men really not care about our weight or are we just more inclined to be quieter about it perhaps? In my case, I've wanted to get back into my old clothes for a while (I've got a Rammstein tour shirt and old Brighton shirts I can't wear any more for example!) and it was a health issue for a family member that really pushed me to actually doing something more than complaining about it. It'd be interesting to hear what motivates other people for losing weight, male or female. Are we really as different as it feels when it boils down to it?

 

[Noddynoobs]

my main motivation is looks! i know that sounds really shallow, but there you go! i want to be able to wear a bikini on holiday and not feel like a big lumpy thing! of course the health benefits are an added bonus!

 

[Caz]

I think men are more quiet and less social/groups about it!

 

[Mr Gilbo]

I think men may do it more for health than looks. But also I think we are less inclined to ask for help. Hence why we are a dying breed at classes.

 

[_Gizmo_]

I've got loads of things that motivate me. Looks, health, things I wanna do and getting into clothes I have but can't wear atm! Mainly my Rammstein shirt I got at Sonisphere last year but it's still too tight lol Taking part in a charity trek is a great motivator.

I've known guys who want to lose weight for health and looks reasons. Mainly health I think though. A lot say they need to lose weight but don't really try.

 

[Dominoid]

That was pretty much the case for me for ages. I guess we're just more stubborn about change! Nice to see there's two of us with Rammstein shirts as an incentive. 3 if you count my gf who wants to get into the tiny womens shirts they do.

 

[_Gizmo_]

The one I wanna get into is a womens fit. My other tour Tshirt is normal so at least I can wear that one for now! Lol also have ones that are too big for me now but I guess that's a good thing! XD I just use them for the gym lol

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[Sassia]

Very interesting subject. Society/media etc have always pressured women to look good. I was reading a book from 1937 that stated if you were going to 'let yourself go' and become 'large and slovenly' you shouldn't be surprised if your husband looks elsewhere. No mention of how your husband should look though....

I was having this discussion (debate...argument!) with a male friend who insists there is now pressure for men to look muscley and toned. I disagreed, but I'm sure there is some growing pressure. I just feel us women have far, far more. I think body image is far more linked to a woman's self esteem than it is for a man. Not saying that it isn't at all, but I don't think body image is the be all and end all for men, but unfortunately too many women are caught up thinking their self worth is linked to their dress size.

 

[Micci]

You've said all I could have said on the subject, but more clearly. Thank you.

 

[sparklychar]

'A woman can never be too rich or too thin'
- wallis simpson

I agree with the poster who said that men are probably less groupy and social about it... its also could be more about the emotional motivations of women vs men being more logical?
I know that both my boyfriend, and my brother in law are very straight up when losing weight, just simple less in, more exercise.... obviously I know I'm generalising wildly and not everyone is the same!

 

[johnnyblue]

I've written a dissertation on this within a historical/literary theme, but yes, women have centuries of conditioning that delicacy = goodness. Outer fragility = inner strength. You're worth more if you're what your society deems pretty. It's depressingly enduring.

Also, Rammstein FTW.

 

[year2teacher]

My personal motivation is looks which depressingly for me links directly to my self worth. It's awful but it's how I feel, but I really think that people like slim people more than big people. In no way am I saying that that is fair, but it's how I see the world. Links quite a bit to Bourdieu's theory of cultural capital, and more recently erotic capital!! If you want to succeed in life then that will be easier if you look 'right'. Generally this means slim.

It really is a sad state of affairs but one which I am part of too.

I do think that this applies to men too, though possibly to lesser extent as women are more generally judged on their looks; with men this effect is less so.

xxx

 

[happypear]

It's drummed into women from the day they're born that pretty much their sole value is in their attractiveness (and their ability to reproduce).

For every time we tell girls that they can be and do whatever they want and fulfil any ambition they have, we show them something different when they have a barrage of pink things shoved on them from the day they're born, when we expect them to look and behave differently from boys and when, in the year 2011 women are still being paid up to 40% less than men for the same work in some professions.

That, and the expectation that women will be very caring and supportive results in big groups of women encouraging each other like they do here.


On the (albeit dubious) plus side, what women don't know about dieting probably isn't worth knowing since most of them (or should I say us) have been on one since the dawn of time, so anyone, male or female who trying to lose weight is probably in the right place .

 

[Legomom]

I think it's down to beer two of my male friends were really up for losing a bit of middle age spread an wanted tips on dieting........until i pointed out that beer may be a liquid but you sure can't lose wright drinking 2 litres of it a day!!! They never did start that diet.......

Seriously though almost all female role models are slim. But most male role models not so much ( I'm thinking go back a few decades to when women didn't feature as much in politics business etc) the current shift Towards men taking better care of themselves is coinciding with the growing rise in celebrity. Men are looking at footballers and film stars now rather than presidents etc. Just a thought!

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[Konvictz]

i want to look good and feel good, im a sporty person, so my stamina is everything, every pound loss improves my stamina somewhat.

when a girl looks at me in 'that way' i must admit it feels good (not that it happens often at all), and id like to look even better, more chiselled cheeks and a decent figure would allow me to wear my tight t shirts with confidence. i dont just want to loose weight, i want to gain some muscle mass as well, as loosing weight may make me small, and small people have less presence next to big people.

 

[surfinbernard]

I know I am generalising but men are more visually stimulated than women. Gay men are often extremely particular about their appearance because it is men who will be looking and men do go for looks, at least initially. Straight men don't feel as much need to look a certain way to attract women because confidence, a good sense of humour and any number of other qualities are as attractive to us, if not more so, than a six pack.

Women know that they can pretty much take their pick of men, or keep the interest of the one they have and generally compare well against other women if they look their best and that this is how men rate them at the end of the day. As a result we tend to feel invisible, unappealing and unwanted if we are larger than our ideal size.