Grrr.

Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by lostdeb, 30 October 2011 Social URL.

  1. lostdeb

    lostdeb New Member

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    Hiya. I'm a first time poster. I love Slimming World with a passion, but i'm really struggling at the mo. I joined in January 08, after being overweight since my early teens. I went on to lose 9 and a half st in 20 months, and got to target. I've never stopped going to group, but the last 12 months have been hard. I'm an emotional eater, and although it's mostly under control, i still occasionally lapse, and when i do. My gains are massive. I'm currently about a stone and half above my target, and trying so hard, but the weight won't shift again. I've mixed things up, but still nothing. I'm under a lot of stress at the mo. I have a Son who is Autistic, and even though he can't help it, i'm feeling very overwhelmed with it all. I love my Husband, but he can't see how stressed i am. My poor Daughter is suffering because of the mood in the house. I know i need to see the doctor, as i think i'm depressed, but i'm scared to go on tablets in case i gain weight. I seem to be more down about my weight now, then when i was 21st, and it's doing my head in!
    I apologise for the rant, i just needed to get it off my chest anonymously. xxx
     
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  3. greedyguts1980

    greedyguts1980 Silver Member

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    Chin up Deb :) you have so much to be proud of!! You lost ALL that weight once, you can do it again!!

    Is yr OH supportive with yr son? It's too much for you to cope with alone.

    Write down a list of tasks you do and how often you do them and how it makes you feel. Then show yr husband and daughter and ask for help!!

    Even if it's little things like washing the dishes and putting them away or putting a load of washing in. Doing your food shopping online saves so much time and stress!! It's an extra hour or so to do something nice for yourself.

    I don't know an awful lot about anti-depressants. I know I wouldn't like to take them.

    Good luck Deb and let us know how yr getting on :) xxx

    Sent from my iPod touch using MiniMins
     
  4. laura4988

    laura4988 Full Member

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    Firstly, **big hugs**.
    You e done so well to get where you are now, don't forget that.
    I can't imagine how hard things at home must be. your scared the doctor will just stick you on tablets, but I'm sure if you explain this to them they'll try and find an alternative. It might be that it comes down to having to take the tablets, but you need to start at the core first because if your eating and weight is emotional, you'll need to fix the depression first.
    As for the weight loss, sit down and think why you are doing this, and not just to be slimmer. Why do you want to be slimmer? A holiday, wedding, friends party, or just to look/feel sexier, or fit in better clothes? Remember why you want to do this, and how you felt when you did x
     
  5. L1sa

    L1sa Banned

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    Hi

    Bigs hugs to you x
    I have been on anti depressants and HRT both of which can put weight on BUT my advice is go to the Drs and get the help to sort your depression and maybe also speak to a counsellor (I have and it helped ALOT)!
    If you can help your depression you can then tackle your weight because you'll be in a better state of mind. Have you set up any respite for your son? It's not just time out for you but your other family members and him too. A time which everyone would benefit and be able to re focus

    Good luck always here to support

    Xx
     
  6. Shirleen

    Shirleen Gold Member

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    If you have clinical depression you are nit going to snap out of it. Prolonged stress, emotional upheaval, feelings of isolation, lack of support can alter the chemicals in your brain, if you have clinical depression ( your dr will tell you) you need the pills to put you right again.
    Depression is not a sign of weakness it's often a sign you have been coping for far too long.
    Emotional eating is about 'swallowing your feelings' well 'better out than in' is a good motto for feelings. You need to tell your husband how you feel but personally I would wait until the depression has lifted as you may come across too negative and unfixable, which puts far too much pressure on him.

    People don't always gain weight on anti depressants a few are prescribed to aid weight loss. With the depression sorted the need to binge will lift. Even if you do gain a few pounds you KNOW you can get it off! 9.5 stone in under 2 years is phenomenal!

    Make sure you ate receiving the help you need from outside too.
    Do you attend a support group for parents of Autistic children? Ask around not only is it great support you get to see how other parents cope, hear about schemes that may help too.

    You have done so well, be kind to yourself.
     
  7. ermintrude

    ermintrude Gold Member

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    Hey Deb, sorry to hear your troubles :( But I agree with what the others have said above, look at how much you've achieved! 9 and a half stone is an *immense* achievement and to have only put a stone and a half on, well tbh I think you've done amazingly, especially with the other problems you have to deal with! A stone and a half is not that much on the grand scheme of things and at the moment your mental well being and family are far more important.

    Dont worry about tablets, well I know its impossible not to worry - but there are various options you can try and *even if they do* slow your losses a bit (which is by no means guaranteed to happen) you're far more likely to gain weight through being so unhappy than any minor effect of medication. Maybe its more having to face up to problems or having to accept we can't control everything ourselves and do need some help that makes us not want to see the doctor? I can only speak for myself but those are the sort of things that go through my mind. Im on anti depressants and various other meds but Im losing steadily so its definitely possible to do both! :)

    Anyway, any time you need to get things off your chest there are plenty of people here you can chat to Anon. Take care, you will get through all this x :bighug:
     
  8. kerryathome

    kerryathome Silver Member

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    sounds like you have a really stressful life hun, but as everyone else says you have done so well to lose so much in such a short space of time, agree with Shirleen you need to get the depression sorted before anything else, and as she says there is no shame in it, its a brave thing to admit how things are affecting you, you need help hun.

    then you can get back onto losing that stone and a half again, you did it before, you'll do it again when the time is right, I would imagine that stone and a half is affecting you more than when you had 9 stone to lose because of everything else thats going on. maybe you think its just another thing you can't keep control of and its the straw that broke the camels back.

    You can always come on here and have an anonymous offload/rant whatever you want to call it.

    we're here for each other xx
     
  9. lostdeb

    lostdeb New Member

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    Thankyou so much for your replies. I'm really touched by them. I'm going to the Doctors tomorrow, and hopefully get something sorted. For all the families sake. I do feel sorry for my Hubby sometimes. He's a pain in the backside, but i know i don't make it easy for him. On a positive note. Even though i feel especially crap today, i've not binged, so that's 12 days now without. Thankyou again for all your words. xxx
     
  10. Maddysmum

    Maddysmum Gold Member

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    Woop woop for your 12 days. :woohoo:
    please stop giving yourself a hard time - you sound like you deserve a pat on the back or at least a great big hug
    :bighug:
    Hang on in there!

    As for the anti-depressants - i was on them for 5 years and they didn't cause the weight gain. It was coming off them too early and so bingeing that caused the weight.
    Hope your doctor is understanding
    xxx
     
  11. lostdeb

    lostdeb New Member

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    Hiya. Me again. Just an update. Thanks to everybody's support yesterday, i bit the bullet, and paid a visit to the Docs, and she was fantastic. I went in all calm, ready to explain how i was feeling, and ended up blubbing on her! lol. She was great though. She listened, and asked lots of questions, and i'm now on anti-depressants. I explained my concern about gaining weight, and she made a good point, that my binging is likely to be down to my emotions, and if we can get them under control, then i should find it easier to get my eating under control as well. She asked if i would like counselling, but i explained that i'm better talking virtually, as opposed to real life, and has given me the name of a website that should help. It can take a couple of weeks for the tablets to kick in, and i have to go back and see her in a fortnight, but i'm already feeling a bit more positive, just by going. I've still not binged. Yay. Thankyou again all. I don't think you realise how much you've helped. But thanks to you all, i've now done something to change me for the better. Bless you all. I just have weigh in to content with tomorrow, and it better be a good one, especially has hubbies just had fish and chips, and i had stir fry! lol. xxx
     
  12. Roziee

    Roziee Gold Member

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    Congratulations on such a fantastic loss deb. I can't wait to be in your position and say I've lost 9 stones!

    Why don't you put up a food diary, as well as a run down on how you're feel everyday here? Many of us use the diary section to write what we've eaten everyday- people are wonderful and will point you in the right direction if you get something wrong and will never say anything hurtful- we're all in the same boat after all.

    I vent in my diary all the time, and someone will always be there to give you support! You said yourself that you feel more comfortable seeking counsel virtually, so use us :) we're all here to help.

    X
     
  13. kerryathome

    kerryathome Silver Member

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    sounds like you have a fab Gp, and well done for being so honest with her, its the only way forward really.

    good luck for weigh in tomorrow, whatever it shows keep your chin up and look forward to the next week,

    xx
     
  14. greedyguts1980

    greedyguts1980 Silver Member

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    Good luck for weigh in!! Xx
     
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