Gulp! As Whitesnake once said, "here I go again on my own" ...

[Loopy_Lou]

:wave_cry:

Hello everybody! Well I'm another restarter, and I'm bricking it! :cry:

I did CD (successfully) in 2006 - I lost nearly 3 stone starting at nearly 14st and finishing at just under 11st. I then lost a further 7-8lbs through eating sensibly and exercising. All was hunky dory.

Then in April 07 I changed jobs. I'd been spoilt by working in a big swanky building with an amazing salad bar in the restaurant and a small gym for employees that I could nip to every day. Suddenly the new staff restaurant was sandwiches and chips, there was no gym nearby, I didn't have time to join a gym near me (translation: was too lazy and don't like getting up early) and I was in an office which has 3 Starbucks, a KFC, a McDs, Burger King, and any number of unhealthy choices surrounding it. So from April until September I managed to put on nearly all the weight again. I knew it was happening and I kind of gave up. I'd go on mini diets here and there, and did actually join a gym near home, but I just ate and ate and ate, and then when I felt depressed at losing what I'd worked hard to achieve, I ate more to feel better. Especially when I looked in my wardrobe at all the lovely size 12 clothes (I know!!) I'd bought and couldn't wear as they wouldn't even go near me. :cry:

In September I went to a hypnotherapist to try and reprogramme my brain, and after a course of sessions I'm now half a stone lighter through eating what I want (because now what I want is healthy options). It's been absolutely fantastic, and has helped me deal with why I had issues with food, and why I give up. I learned to enjoy going to the gym, feel more confident about myself, and want to change my eating behaviour.

So why am I here? Well I'm changing my role at work and will be moving to a new building which is more customer facing. I won't be able to get away with sitting at a desk unseen in my size 18 trousers and comfy big jumpers. I'll have to start wearing a suit a few days a week, and I have 6 hanging my wardrobe - 4 are a size 12, and 2 are a size 14. I've only recently moved up from squeezing into a 16 so if I can boost myself over the next 3-4 weeks by doing what I know works, I won't have to go out and buy yet more big clothes. What makes it worse is that when I finished CD last time, I felt so good bagging up all my big clothes and taking them to the charity shop. I'd saved money to buy new clothes and for the first time in my life I was in 'normal' shops like Top Shop, and nobody looked at me like I shouldn't be there. It was the most fantastic feeling. I want that again! Whether I do it completely through CD or half CD half myself (thanks to my hyponotherapy woman), I don't know yet. All I do know is that I need to lose about 1.5st to get into my size 14s, and 40lbs to get to where I left off. :sigh:

I don't know if I can do, but I'm going to bl**dy well try! I'm scared, and feel sick, and I'm kind of ready for the lies to avoid any food offered to me ("I've just eaten thanks", "no, I don't like those" etc).

I'll let you know how I do. Thanks for reading this epic! :break_diet:

 

[Hedgemag]

Welcome back Loopy_Lou and good luck with your weight loss journey. Stay focused and you will be there in no time.

 

[Loopy_Lou]

Thank you Hedgemag, and well done on your 34lb loss - that's amazing!

L x

 

[Eclipse]

Hi Loopy Lou, welcome to the boards, you will get all the help, inspiration and fun on here! You can do it, and good luck !!

 

[Loopy_Lou]

Thank you Cheryl! Another success story!

I've already had my first litre, am bursting for the loo, and about to have a soup. Oh how the memories have just come flooding back ...

L x

 

[Mini]

Hi Lou,

Welcome back and well done on losing half a stone already and getting your head arond your issues with food.

I've only recently moved up from squeezing into a 16 so if I can boost myself over the next 3-4 weeks by doing what I know works, I won't have to go out and buy yet more big clothes. What makes it worse is that when I finished CD last time, I felt so good bagging up all my big clothes and taking them to the charity shop. I'd saved money to buy new clothes and for the first time in my life I was in 'normal' shops like Top Shop, and nobody looked at me like I shouldn't be there. It was the most fantastic feeling. I want that again! Whether I do it completely through CD or half CD half myself (thanks to my hyponotherapy woman), I don't know yet. All I do know is that I need to lose about 1.5st to get into my size 14s, and 40lbs to get to where I left off. :sigh:

You have said you have only recently moved out of a size 16 up to a size 18... probably only need to SS for two weeks to shift the bloat feeling...

Two weeks SSing could see you back into your size 16 again and about a stone off.

Then if you moved to doing AAM and then onto 790 you would be able to eat a light salad when out and about... you would continue to lose.

I think sometimes after achieving our weight loss and looking good and feeling good we can take it all for granted and not appreciate the hard work and effort it took to get there in the first place... and in a strange way some of us need to go back and visit that old feeling of being over weight etc., so that we can compare the difference and to reaffirm that being overweight and out of sorts is not the place we ever want to be again...if you catch my drift

Will you be going back to have a few more sessions of hyponotherapy with this woman as she does seem to of helped you a lot.

Love Mini xxx

 

[SoonToBeGorgeous]

You will get there - you have done it before and you can do it again!

Hope all goes well for you

 

[louisa26]

hi lou Well done on loosing it last time, well done on loosing the half a stone and well done on coming back on the cd wagon and wanting to make a go of it again!

You have alot to be congratulated on!

21.5 is going to go in no time BELIEVE ME! Your target and time scale is perfect i reckon you will loose it and maybe a little bit more... GO FOR IT!

 

[Loopy_Lou]

Wow! Thank you everyone, you're really kind! I'm really touched!

Well, I'm feeling rather strange at the moment - I've had a litre of water, a litre of dandelion tea (I'm a bit wierd with my teas!), and one pack. I'm also feeling really positive now thanks to all your comments. You're all doing so well, and it helps to know that you're all on the mountain trying to climb with me!

Mini, thanks a lot for your words - I think you're exactly right. Last time my journey was smooth and I'd never done so well before, so now I'm back here I regret that I didn't appreciate how well I'd done. I think another problem I had was that I lost the weight quicker than my brain could keep up with, if that makes sense, so when I started to put the weight back on, I didn't realise because in my head I still felt overweight to some extent. You're right that this time I'm doing it for the right reasons. And yes I am still seeing my hypnotherapist, but only for top up sessions now. To begin with I saw her once or twice a week, then once every 7-10 days, and now it's about once a month. In fact I last saw her before I went on holiday over Christmas, and if you can believe this, I went to Florida for Christmas and New Year and lost nearly 4lbs eating what I wanted! Amazing!

It's just that it's a long slow road, and one I fully accept I need to be on, but I need a boost to show myself it can be done. If I only had a stone to lose it'd be different, but as I said in my original post I would ideally like to lose the full 3+ stone in the long term.

So, onwards and upwards, and with the support of you guys we can help each other all get where we want to be!

Thank you! :flowers:

L x

 

[Mini]

Hi Lou,

Last time my journey was smooth and I'd never done so well before, so now I'm back here I regret that I didn't appreciate how well I'd done. I think another problem I had was that I lost the weight quicker than my brain could keep up with, if that makes sense, so when I started to put the weight back on, I didn't realise because in my head I still felt overweight to some extent.

I do think this is the down side of a vlcd...that the head takes longer to catch up and to be able to appreciate the weight loss. It is very confusing...

But not unlike the same experience when one first tries to stop smoking...

you have not smoked for awhile and think, sure this was easy and then you think, well I will only have the onesee what it is like now that I am a non smoker... and it goes from their and your back smoking heavier than before.


I think it is great that you are getting top up sessions with your hypnotherapist as you seem to be working very well with her and we do need all the support we can, that is for sure.

I went to Florida for Christmas and New Year and lost nearly 4lbs eating what I wanted! Amazing!

Yes it is amazing and shows that you have changed your relationship with food. Well done that is a wonderful achievement in itself.

If I only had a stone to lose it'd be different, but as I said in my original post I would ideally like to lose the full 3+ stone in the long term

Thinking of the 3 stone in one block can be overwhelming. If you cut it down to size into mini goals that are more achievable in the short term it will help.

By Easter you will be where you want to be.

Love Mini xxx

 

[Loopy_Lou]

You're exactly right! I've cut my journey into smaller chunks. I was going to do 2 x 1.5st, but I think I'm going for an initial 1.5, then 3 x 7lbs as I know it will be slightly easier at first. By the time I'm into my last stone I hope to be back on healthy eating and exercise.

Fingers crossed as this is the last time I am going to be this heavy!

Thank you for your support and encouragement, I really do feel welcome. I'm going to have my second pack now, and another glug, and 25 trips to the loo, and then I will have nearly finished my first day. Yay me!

 

[Mini]

Hi Lou,

think I'm going for an initial 1.5, then 3 x 7lbs as I know it will be slightly easier at first. By the time I'm into my last stone I hope to be back on healthy eating and exercise.

I think thats is very sensible and doable.

The trips to the loo do settle down after the first week...

Join us on the Stepping it out for 2008 thread

Here is the link http://www.minimins.com/fitness-exercise/28518-get-fit-step-out-2008-a.html

Love Mini xxx

 

[BIG BIRDY]

Loopy lou, your journey seems to be shadowing mine! Not so much the job changes, because my weight flew back on when I found a lump in my neck last year, and I just thought 'what the heck' and ate. The hypnotherapist seems to have done her trick with you which is very reassuring. I have JUST started to listen to Paul McKennas' cd's, so I will persevere with that I think. I was listening to it on my ipod whilst walking the dog. Big mistake as I woke up when he started to count me out of a hypnotherapy session, and thought 'How the hell did I get here?'. I had walked miles, perfectly oblivious to my surroundings and wellfare! I couldv'e lost the dog or anything and not known. Next time I will be lying down for sure! I also agree with you whole heartedly.
THIS IS THE LAST TIME I AM GOING TO BE THIS BIG.
So good luck with your next journey, mine has started again on Thursday, hopefully for the last time!

 

[Loopy_Lou]

Hi big birdy! :wavey:

Gosh I'm sorry to hear you found a lump on your neck, that must have been awful. I really hope all is well now. :character00238:

Well, funny you should mention Paul McKenna as that is why I went to a hypnotherapist. I saw PMK on QVC and decided to give it a go. I got the cds, and listened to them kind of once every 1-2 weeks which was not the best idea. I wondered why I wasn't immediately cured! Anyway I could see that it did work, but I wasn't commited, so I looked up hypnotherapists who work on the same principle as him. I think it's called EMK or something? (could be completely wrong there!) So I started seeing a hypno lady who went through issues I had with eating, and how it made me feel, and how it held me back, and we even found a trigger point from when I was a teenager and had a bulimic friend. You see I would join her in eating loads of rubbish, but then she would throw up and I wouldn't! We started to find a lot of bad habits and patterns, and it was really great and just a little bit scary. Now I've dealt with a lot of these probs, I only see her every so often, but I still top up with the PMK cds. In fact, I was on holiday over Christmas and used his exercise cd to motivate me to do stuff like riding a bike, swimming, walking etc.

I can't believe you listened when you took the dog for a walk! That's funny in a very naughty way. I only ever listen when I'm lying down on the bed or couch. Good job they're only 20+ mins or who know where you would have ended up!

So, we're both in the same boat, so to speak. Good luck with your journey, and lets definitely do this!

L xx

 

[BIG BIRDY]

Ha! LOL! I listen to him when I'm out with the dog cos it's the only time spare thats mine! But I do usually skip the hypno bits. Guess I slipped up one day and you know the rest. I too haven't done it properly for a while, but the bit where you have to dig your nail into a finger and think of something to put you off a particular food (s) works a treat. I just keep forgetting to use it, but when I do it works. I have even taught it to the practise nurse at the surgery! ( I love these little icons). I might try hypnotherapy further down the line. I really can't pinpoint anything in my childhood that gave me an eating disorder, more likely to have been my marriage! Getting called fat and ugly when only 7lb over my skinny weight probably didn'y help matters. (I was 9st 10lb then! LOL!). I think I ate what I wanted really. Never a whole pkt biscuits, or a cake or anything. Just ate more than 1, or 2. Then it creeps up behind you literally! There is only so many times a washing machine can shrink only YOUR clothes!:silly: I think my ticker says 46lb to go. It sure goes on alot quicker than it comes off.