HaHa - first "sucking air thru teeth" comments today!!

Blonde Logic

Yes. You can.
As I have said other times, I have been very lucky in that I have received little, if any negative feedback from anyone about this diet.

But there is one lady I work with - bless her - who has done weight watchers a few times - she is by no means terribly overweight in drastic measures - but she wanted to slim down.

Anyway - about a stone ago she told me "oh you MUST be done - surely you are done by now - surely you don't have anymore weight to lose - you don't want to get too thin", etc., etc. (you mean, you don't want me to get thinner then you)

I smiled, and firmly told her, "My diet is over, when I say its over, and when I am happy." Emphasizing on the "I".

Well, today she approached me - looked me right up and down, and said, "Have you eaten yet?" I told her next week I would be. Again, the sucking air., "Ooooooh - you don't want to get too thin. You know. I mean you are looking gaunt."

I smiled, and said, "No, actually, I'm not. In fact,- I am quite happy with the way I look!" :D

She said, "Yes, you look wonderful!" lol (but - you just said with fear in your eyes that I look gaunt??)

Then she went on to tell me I must eat because you know, so and so is bulimic and you don;t want to mess around with this stuff.....

lol - busy body!! :D

Don't let em get to you ladies - just give it right back!!! :)
 
Lol BL,

I recognise that 'well meaning friend' who never wants you to get slim because- 'we love you the way you are'!
 
Good on you. I was having issues with my sister about my weight loss but my mum put her in her place by saying she should give LL a go as she is quite overwieght herself and for the first time since high school (over 25 yrs ago) i am slimmer than my sister she's just jealous like that lady.
 
I really understand this, I get people all the time saying the same thing-you don't want to be getting too thin do you! I even got it while I was still obese, they just don't like the thought of a 'fat girl' being more attractive than them.

xx
 
Good on you for still remaining so pleasant while being firm with her BL, I think I would've just got annoyed and told her to get out of my face lol!!
 
Good for you, I am trying so very hard to be as assertive as you were, these people just seem to have no idea what they are doing, or talking about.

You look fantastic, we can obviously see that, you know it and she cant stand it.

Lisa x
 
hehe thanks girls.

Assertiveness comes with time Lisa - don't worry - your confidence will continue to build and one day you will suddenly, naturally so something - and then thing "wow! 6 months ago I would never have done that!!" and it just gets easier and more natural as it goes.

We take/took alot of grief from people and situations due to our weight - for me, simply to avoid any kind of confrontation that required people to look at me and well, pah, I would just slink away defeated. Not any more!! Now - just try it on. I'll have my say. :D

Its a pretty liberating feeling, I must admit, to have the confidence to actually say what is on my mind, and not what I think people want to hear. :)
 
I definitely recognise that type. The sort of person who feels that, as long as they're not the biggest person in the room, they don't have to confront their own weight issues. What she's really saying is, "please don't be smaller than me because then I will to have to see myself as overweight". Well handled BL, firm but fair!
 
My problem is, when im out i think people are just looking at me and say what a fatty, noone has ever said anything about my weight, only my little twin brothers where they named there fish after me, coz it had a fat bum, it didnt bother me, i just laughed.
But when you know yourself you are overweight, you feel bad and i dont know about you when i go to buy clothes i get embarrassed, i wont try them on till i get home, then im gutted cos it didnt fit, then i just sit and cry, 1 time i came out of the shop crying i just had to go home, that was when i was at my heaviest 17st and i went up up to size 20 , tho i lost 2st im still a size 20, which upsets me, because i think im going to me size 20 for the rest of my life even tho i lost.
 
WOW BL!
I want to come to your school of assertiveness - good on ya!
I am still a scaredy cat and tend to walk away from confrontation!
Most people hate the emerging butterfly that LL brings - yes we change and become more outgoing, more physically attractive and these people see you as a threat!
I completely overhauled my so called friendships when they became downright mean and spiteful - I didnt need them and their negativity! I have a core friendship from my happy past who love me fat or thin and I have never been so popular with new friendships that I have formed!
ooh heck hark at me on my soap box!!!!!
Sorry - but I think you said your piece with such confidence - I wish I could have done that when I first lost the weight!
Lynn - the size will go down - you will have been a big 20 going into a smaller 20 and before you know it the 18s will be loose!
Don't be discouraged - it has to work!
xx
 
My problem is, when im out i think people are just looking at me and say what a fatty, noone has ever said anything about my weight, only my little twin brothers where they named there fish after me, coz it had a fat bum, it didnt bother me, i just laughed.
But when you know yourself you are overweight, you feel bad and i dont know about you when i go to buy clothes i get embarrassed, i wont try them on till i get home, then im gutted cos it didnt fit, then i just sit and cry, 1 time i came out of the shop crying i just had to go home, that was when i was at my heaviest 17st and i went up up to size 20 , tho i lost 2st im still a size 20, which upsets me, because i think im going to me size 20 for the rest of my life even tho i lost.


there, there....:) We ALL have felt like that. You did better then me - I only shopped online! ANd was usually dissappointed.

But rest assured - those days will be but a distant memory soon.....promise....if you stay on course - they will be history!
 
I can't wait to be the girl they tell off for being too thin!!

When I get to that stage, they can tell me to stop and I'll take it with a smile on my face cus nobody has ever told me I was too small before.

B x
 
Honestly, these people...you get them everywhere!! I remember buying my son a gingerbread man in Tesco once and a woman telling me off for not making my own. I was so shocked I wish I'd have told her to sling her hook!
You're lucky BL that you have not had it too much, I have so many people saying all the time for me to stop...my mother being the worst!!! I know I've mentioned before but she had an eating disorder previously so thats where her concerns are coming from. I loved your comeback though, I'm always a bit slow off the mark but have my line ready now, "Well I'm aiming for a healthy BMI and given the fact that I am training in the health profession I think it's only fair that before I have to talk to people about their weight and diets I am seen to be setting the example". That seems to have worked thus far :)
 
Hey Girlies

Ive sneaked out of the mens forum and reading this thread with interest. As a bloke who works with a lot of women I have to suffer the 'can't be good for you' 'you look yellow' you look ill' comments.

But the classic came this week with 'your being brainwashed'. My simple reply was that 'If washing my brain can loose 36 lbs in less than 5 weeks then pass me the soap' that shut her up.

Its funny how you almost go from being embarrassed initialy to feeling sorry for their levels of ignorance.

Loosin weight and luvin it

hang on in their girlies
 
it's funny, a skinny girl in my office noticed I wasnt having the usual lunch and wouldnt let it rest until I told her I was on a diet, to which she said that I should be able to treat myself. I insisted that I didnt want to and she kept insisting I should be able to have cake each and everyday.
I said 'do I look like I need cake?!....it has been me giving into cake that has left me 5-6 stone heavier than I should be!'

she then said something about it not being realistic to try and get back to the weight we were in our 20's (why not? I was a healthy size 14/16 then!). Why is it that thin people do not think that bigger people should slim down to 'their' size, I do think sometimes thinner people think that bigger people are of a different species.

Mmmmm, also a well meaning friend who hasnt see me for some weeks and said 'blimey, you've lost weight' (in an accusing voice, she doesnt believe in diets she thinks you should just move more) I said 'well I am still 15 stone, it's not like I am wasting away!' she then kept offering me biscuits! I may have to put off seeing her soon, cos I know she will give me grief if she notices more weight loss.

But I remember this from years ago, when I was a size 14/16 I had comments from well meaning people that I should put on weight, that having some meat on you was healthy. I listened to that, but I wont again. Thank goodness for minimins and the great support here!
 
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