Hi i`m back again lol

[Roch]

Glad to see things are looking up for you. Your weekend away sounds wonderful and I do hope you enjoy yourself and the various treatments and have a relaxing time.

Thinking of you
Irene xx

Ty Irene am hoping that the therapy which will be ongoing will help me get to the root of my terrible relationship with food to help me after surgery.
Am looking forward to the pampering as well, will have 2 hrs of pampering each day and then the rest of the day different holistic therapy to help with my depression and food addiction and poor self love.
How r u doing hun, whats new xx

 

[Roch]

Hi soz not been around but had probs with laptop. Well unfortunately surgery has been put on hold due to some breathing probsand some other health probs i have now and they think its 2 risky 4 me to undergo surgery at the moment.
Been diagnosed officially with pcos and actually given meds for it and also under going tests for metabolic x syndrome and also am going to see an eating disorders specialist. Am just doing a low cal diet at the moment and seem to be losing weight as clothes feel looser.
I will get there eventually but have to be realistic that i have abused my body all my life now i have actually done some harm to my body and need to work hard on reversing these probs so wil be fit enough for surgery but am willing to wait and work on slowly losing some weight to improve on my fitness.
Had a nasty prob where i live with bnp bas-ards and they sprayed bnp on my neighbours fence who is a really nice black lady and also an asian family gpt bnp sprayed all over their car i got a swaz stika(soz have spelt it wrong but its a natzi sign) sprayed on my front door this really upset me and started getting panic attacks again and doc put me on some strong meds as this has happened to me before and made my life very hard. 4 weeks later my housing association have finally got it removed after me making various complaints.
Aaron is now 16 and is sitting his moped CBT training today he just called me to say he is at lunch and had done most of the theory stuff and will be doing the next 2 hrs on the road to see if he passes, so fingers crossed for that, i always said he was not allowed a moped but things are getting so dangerous for youths, so many stabbings that i prefer him to be on the road than walking around and he is very sensible. He pushed his bike for 40 mins to get to the course tday with me driving by his side lol.
My uncles have recently bought me a lovely present a car and now at least i am out and about each day have not been driving for 4 months and it feels lovely to have freedom again.
Off to do some housework and see what the dogs are up 2 in the garden lol.

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Hi Roch
I tried ringing you the other night but the number you gave me doesn't seem to work - pm me your number and I'll try again.
Good to see you posting, hope all went well with his CBT. I have my motorbike test next month!

 

[Clint66]

Hay don't give up on a Sciatica because there maybe something
out there that will help. also I understand that you have a few pounds to loose have you ever click onto wellnessexpected.com
try it and let see. I know about this Sciatica because I had it 5 years age and went everywhere try to get help and spend a lot of money with Dr. and Chiropractic and it would be only temporary relief. When I used E.F.T. within 2 weeks It was gone

 

[Roch]

Hi Roch
I tried ringing you the other night but the number you gave me doesn't seem to work - pm me your number and I'll try again.
Good to see you posting, hope all went well with his CBT. I have my motorbike test next month!

Hi Jen, soz have not been online again been hiding lol. Aaron did not pass but re took it this Sunday and passed, so for the last 2 days have hardly seen him. how r u doing hun, am sure u will pass ur test with flying colours as everything u put ur mind 2 u always complete.
Will pm u my number, have recently changed it.
chat soon and ty hun xxx

 

[Roch]

Hay don't give up on a Sciatica because there maybe something
out there that will help. also I understand that you have a few pounds to loose have you ever click onto wellnessexpected.com
try it and let see. I know about this Sciatica because I had it 5 years age and went everywhere try to get help and spend a lot of money with Dr. and Chiropractic and it would be only temporary relief. When I used E.F.T. within 2 weeks It was gone

Ty Clint will check out the site have just started learning bout eft, if its the same thing, emotional freedom technique or are we talking bout 2 different things lol.

 

[Roch]

:cry:Ok here i am back again,not sure why i keep on hiding when it just makes things worse and i spirall out of controll alone.
Everyone on this site is so supportive and have been so caring towards me and i have given nothing back but moaning stupid posts.

As i said before the surgeon wont operate on me at the moment for health reasons and also my depression is very bad.
I cant carry on like this, i am not asking for sympathy as i dont deserve it i have allowed myself to get like this, i am the one who stuffs the food into my mouth, but why the hell do i do it.:argh:

Whats wrong with me that i am such a greedy pig that i cant stop eating ??
I have gained weight in the last week yet again,the low cal diet lasted a few days then of course i gave in like normal.
I am a bloody failure and dont know how to get out of this vicious circle.
Thought surgery was going to be my way out but its not meant to be:cry:

I am alone and cant carry on like this, have not left the house in 4 days and feel like crap, trying to get the courage to re join weightwatchers but just the sheer shame of standing on the scales and someone else knowing how much i weigh horrifies me.
I know if i dont do something now then i wont see the end of the year and thats not an exageration.

Where do i go next, where can i find the strenght to carry on:cry:

 

[blue_grapefruit]

Roch,

Firstly you are not a greedy pig. You, like the rest of us, have a problem with food and it needs dealing with. Please don't think you are helpless, you certainly aren't.

It's obvious you want to lose the weight, i just think you need to decide to. Instead of letting it get to you, promise yourself that this is the last day you will be *whatever weight* and take it day by day.

It's a habit, and you need to break it - so find something to replace it...Buy a computer game, or buy some DVD box sets or a jigsaw, ANYTHING to keep you busy for a few days - then your diet will be on automatic.

Stay strong, don't dare give up!! Do you have something like MSN cos a lot of us on minis chat on it and that could also keep you busy and it's social too.

Find the strength inside of you, then this time next year you will be looking back and smiling knowing you have acheivied an amazing result.

Love Leah xx

 

[cah-ching]

Roch.

Are you OK?

 

[KittyB]

(((Roch)))

 

[FatFairNForty(ish)]

Hi Roch

PM me your number sweetheart, we'll set the world to rights.

xx

 

[Roch]

Ok here i am back again after not being around since the begining of August. Ty to all of ya who have posted and wondered how i was or where i was lol.
I really hit a bad time when i was told by the surgeon i was not phyisically or emotionally strong enough to undergo wls and i hit an all time low and am only now resurfacing again.

It has been a hard 3 months and i think the only thing that has got me out of my bed and trying again is that Aaron started college in September and i could not be the reason why he did not go to college as he was so worried about me.

So i have decided to come back yet again to this wonderful place to see if i can take things day by day and slowly and try to make changes to my life. I rejoined ww on tuesday and weighed 27.8 which was no shock to me.I have been invited away in april to the canary islands with aarons girlfriends mum and dad and i really would luv to go so i am hoping this will be an added incentive for me.

I am still on anti d tabs and painkillers for my sicatica but have cut them down from 8 a day to between 3/5 per day.
I have hardly left the house at all in the past 3 months maybe just to go shopping and thats if i have someone with me thats how low i have sunk.
I am now trying to at least go out for a small walk each day with my 2 gorgeous dogs even if its only for 10 mins as i cant manage any more than that as my back pain is 2 bad.
I am also going to enroll on a new" it course" next week so at least i make an effort to go out and mix with others.
I know i cant let my weight carry on ruining my life and its down to me but i find it very hard when i go places and people make it so obvious they are staring at you it makes me feel so ashamed of myself.
Going to get aaron to take some pics of me today so i can post them and also compare them as i go along month by month.

Have to go and get some housework done Ebs and Tia have just come in from the garden and left muddy footprints all over my lounge floor

 

[HelenG]

Lovely to hear from you Roch - no failure, so long as you keep on trying. We are all here to do this together - Lots of hugs to you

 

[Roch]

Lovely to hear from you Roch - no failure, so long as you keep on trying. We are all here to do this together - Lots of hugs to you

Ty Helen thats really nice xxx

 

[HelenG]

No probs! Keep us posted

 

[KittyB]

Hi Roch,
It's so good to see you back hun.
I'm on WW too. How are you finding the plan? - are you on core or points?
xx

 

[size102b]

Hi I'm on ww too before ww I hardly went out had no life and cut myself off from
people, I now go to college start an it course Friday and go to zumba classes.
Small steps hunni I suffer from depression gained 3 stone twice on them so know it's tough.
We have a food problem your not greedy so I hope to see you post again and ww is changing next week so maybe good? ((hugs))
cherry xx