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I just feel awful

Janey

Intuitive Eater
#1
I don't know what to post or what to say without boring everyone, but I lost my most valuable cat and friend on Friday, Floyd. Seeing him die has torn my heart apart. I adored him so much, he was so much more than just a black cat to me. He was so loving, he followed me everywhere, begged for my attention all the time .... and now my house is quiet and empty, and I feel heartbroken and lonely. Very lonely. I am grieving for Floyd like people grieve for humans. I have never felt so bereft over an animal before. I can't eat and feel ill in myself, I can't stop crying, I keep waking up in the middle of the night feeling an overwhelming sense of depression, grief and guilt, and right now I can't cope. I keep scouring the internet reading websites about losing a pet. It doesn't sound much to say my cat died but when you share your home with a living soul who gives 100% love and affection and you adore them wholeheartedly, when they are gone (last Monday I was unaware he was even ill and he was here in the house with me) the emptiness you feel is awful. I can't believe I'll never see him again, I can't even believe I'll ever be happy again. Part of me died with him on Friday. :cry:
 
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#2
Oh Janey, I'm so sorry for your loss & the grief you're going through, losing a pet is so hard, the unconditional love they give you & it is like losing a family member.

My 18 year old Lurcher died a few years ago and it took me months to even start to get over it, I still miss her now & I know I always will.

I know there's nothing I can say to help ease your pain at all, but I'm thinking of you

Much love

Jan
xxx
 

Linda5111

I can do this.
#3
Hi janey.. of course u shoukd grieve ur cat, a pet becomes a part of ur life, and i speak from experience when i say.. u will get over it in time, best wishes...Linda.
 

tishtosh

Hopeful for the future
#4
So sorry to hear it Janey,
Sending you hugs - lots

:hug99::hug99::hug99::hug99::hug99::hug99:
 

sazzy34

Gold Member
#5
sending love and thoughts.
I lost my 2 german shepherds last year and it still hurts, don`t make excuses for your feelings.
Take comfort in the love and care you gave him x x
 

AngieBabie

Silver Member
#7
Janey, she wasn't just a cat she was your friend. I would be devastated if any of my animals were to pass away. Just wanted to say I understand and that my thoughts are with you. Angela x
 

Karen

Serial Foodie!
S: 19st7lb C: 18st2lb G: 9st7lb BMI: 49.6 Loss: 1st5lb(6.96%)
#8
sorry to hear about ur cat janey. u need to grieve any way u can as its part of healing. xxx
 

sonkie

Gold Member
G: 12st0lb
#9
Janey hun, its great that you are getting your feelings out on here, it will help and its also both painful and helpful to talk about him.
It is so devastating when you lose a pet, they rely on you for everything and give you unconditional love in return.

Do keep coming on here and talking to us, even tell us funny little stories about him if it will help you.

Big hugs hun xxxx
 

flirty40greeneyes

Busy busy busy!!
S: 15st3lb C: 13st11lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 33.1 Loss: 1st6lb(9.39%)
#10
(((((Janey))))) so sorry to hear your news. Allow yourself to grieve - it is natural and part of the healing process. The people who don't understand are people who have not been in that situation - and then they'll have missed out on the unconditional love that a pet gives you and how wonderful company they can be.

Think about all the happy and funny times you've had - and as Sonkie says if you want to share them online with us, then do so.

Take care.
 

andi

Bye bye bellies!!!
#11
Hi Janey,

As an animal lover and a mum to a dog, a puppy and a cat I know how much he must have meant to you.

It will get better honest, just give yourself a bit of time and when you are ready a little kitten might make you feel better, not that it would replace your cat but it helps with that "empty" feelling.

Take Care
Hugs

Ax
 

Bea

Back on the wagon!
S: 17st7lb C: 16st5lb G: 11st0lb BMI: 39.3 Loss: 1st2lb(6.53%)
#12
Ooohh Janey - that is just so sad....I lost one of my cats Maggie 6 years ago and we still talk about her....your cat was your friend and part of your famiily...take time to grieve its really important that you do that .....animal lovers know what you are going through..and will be hear to help...hugs Bea
 

Janey

Intuitive Eater
#13
I have two other cats and a husband, I have no reason to be lonely, and I feel terrible for saying it. But Floyd had a strong personality, and he wanted loving 24/7 - he followed me everywhere - from the bedroom to the bathroom. He was more than a cat, he was exceptional and everyone who knew my cats always said he was their favourite. He was charismatic, cuddly, friendly and 100% loving. He wasn't a fluffball sleeping in the corner, he was like a human. My hubby and I always joke about what our cats would be if they were human and with Floyd we always said he would be a doctor. He was bright, alert and very intelligent. Floyd not being here in my home is terribly noticeable, no one following me around, wanting my attention constantly, no noisy mieow. I have lost a family member with a big personality and it hurts like hell. I have lost more weight since last Thursday than I have since joining MiniMins but it's been the worst possible way as I am not eating. So, I won't be replacing Floyd because not only is he irreplaceable, but I also already have two other cats. I am thinking of volunteering at the Blue Cross where I rescued Floyd from. I feel I would like to give something back, I've realised this weekend that even though I am a very vocal vegetarian, my love for animals is greater than I ever realised.

 

flirty40greeneyes

Busy busy busy!!
S: 15st3lb C: 13st11lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 33.1 Loss: 1st6lb(9.39%)
#14
Janey - what a lovely idea to volunteer some of your time to the Blue Cross rescue place and a truely memorable gesture to Floyd. I'm sure you'll be able to give some of your love of animals to the unlucky ones there and make a real difference.

Take care of yourself.
 

Barb

Gold Member
#15
I think you need to do something almost in the name of Floyd, so that you continue to feel his influence on your life. Of course he will always be in your heart and your mind, although at the moment it is all so painful, eventually you will be able to think of him happily without the tears and heartache.

Thinking of you and wishing some time to elapse for you.

Lots of love
 

westiegirl

Gold Member
S: 13st1lb C: 13st1lb G: 10st10lb BMI: 29.5 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#16
Janey

I am sending you lots of hugs too. As a pet owner I totally understand what you are feeling. Losing a pet is hard but each one has a special place in our hearts and each one is truly a part of the family, so why on earth would you not grieve - it's only natural.

Not a lot else I can say other than I am thinking of you xxx
 

Mini

Administrator
Staff member
S: 18st2lb C: 16st3.5lb G: 11st2lb Loss: 1st12.5lb(10.43%)
#17
Hi Janey,

So very sorry for the loss of your precious cat Floyd





even in his photo he looks clever and I can fully understand how you feel as a pet lover myself, my own wee dog goes everywhere with me and like right now she is sleeping beside my feet. I would be lost without her.

Sending hugs and much love.

Love Mini xxx
 

Janey

Intuitive Eater
#18
I got sent home from work again today, I was just so hysterical. It's all so embarrassing, but I cannot cope and I know that sounds irrational and I am so ashamed at myself, but I am grieving in a terrible way. My friend came and met me from work at 10am and took me to her house for the day where she cooked for me as I haven't been eating, and let me talk and cry.
 

pandora

finding my way again !
G: 11st7lb
#19
when there is a void in your home it's hard to be there. I have been low today & my dog has obviously picked up on this & has wanted to sit on my lap most of the day.
your friend sounds like she's just what you need at the moment to help you look after yourself.
xx
 

flirty40greeneyes

Busy busy busy!!
S: 15st3lb C: 13st11lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 33.1 Loss: 1st6lb(9.39%)
#20
Can you take the rest of the week off Janey??? It might be better for you to grieve properly before going back to work??

It sounds like you have a wonderful friend there. Take the time to come to terms with your loss - it is no less a loss just because Floyd was a pet. Hopefully in time you'll be able to remember the good times and funny things he did, without getting upset. All part of the grieving process.
 


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