If at first you don't succeed try, try, try and try again....

Elanor

Gold Member
Hello lovely people!

I have decided to start a brand new diary! I have had my old one since I joined Minis nearly 2 years ago, but I am needing a fresh start, so it's being retired.

Since I first joined SW in July 2014 I have lost 4 stone, well, technically it's 3 stone as I have put on a stone since January. I am super proud of what I have achieved so far, but I seem to got stuck in a rut. 2016 has been a horrible year. It started off well, got myself a boyfriend and life seemed to be going well for a change. Now 5 months later my relationship is difficult as his dad died and I haven't seen him for weeks, as quite rightly, he is with his family over 200 miles away. But I don't know if we are going to get through this. I am at a point with my job where I need to leave as it is causing me stress, unfortunately it is things that can't be changed, so I need to leave. Also having issues with my brother which is causing a lot of worry and concern. I have felt very low over the last 3 months, cried a lot and just been a miserable cow.

So now, I have gone back to SW after being away for a year, more to make sure things don't spiral too much out of control. Out of 4 weigh ins I have gained twice, and lost once, maintained once. Every week I have good intentions, but every week I end up drinking too much or buying pizza plus snacks for a Friday night. I just haven't been able to get back into the swing of it. It's not as if I can't do it, 3 stone gone says I can. But there is something in my brain that I seem unable to control, it's like an autopilot that sends me to the pizza and wine and all the bad stuff in the supermarket.

This week I am not worrying about SW, my aims are to avoid pizza and make healthier choices. I am hoping that if have an aim a week then I will rediscover some inspiration.

If you have read this, thank you! I can't guarantee I'll update regularly, but I will make sure I do at least once a week, even if I am talking to myself :)
 
Welcome back Elanor, sounds like you have had so much going on, I'd be exactly the same with wine and takeaways.

But you're getting the focus back and that takes a lot of guts so good on you girl!
 
Thanks Susie :) just taking it one day at a time...
 
So today, I avoided pizza!! But making healthier choices didn't really go to plan, ended up eating a double chocolate muffin for a whopping 30 syns! Then also had a bit of cheese. Overall 50 syns for today! Quite shocking when written down. But, dinner was all on plan and yummy. A tray bake with chicken, red onion, red peppers and mushrooms with a jacket potato on the side. Definitely doing that one again.

Tomorrow is a new day, and I just hope I can avoid the cakes at work! Just need to find a way to turn off that autopilot.....
 
That tray bake sounds gorgeous El - how did you make it?

And don't worry about the syns, they even out over the week. My consultant always used to tell me off for not using them all up :).
 
Tray bake was a chicken breast liberally sprinkled with smoked paprika (which I love), then baked with the red onion, peppers and mushrooms for about 30 minutes in the oven at about 200 degrees. It really was amazing, yet so simple, I am looking forward to trying different veg combinations.

I just logged everything on MFP out of curiosity, and I totalled 2175 calories for the day, which really isn't too bad. I think I am going to use MFP alongside SW, just to see how things work out.
 
Yum - I will try that too. Been craving baked chicken marinated in lemon and soya, might give that a go tomorrow :).

Cals sound good, MFP set me on 1580 a day but I can see myself usually going over.
 
Chicken with lemon sounds delicious! Adding that to my list :)

1875 cals today! So a better day overall, still had treats so not feeling deprived of anything, but also getting some control back! Tomorrow is semi-planned, and today I have been through old MFP diaries from back when I was on track for some inspiration. I think calorie counting suits me, but using SW principles, as SW on it's own just isn't enough for me. Considering I used to hate CCing, it is weird that now it seems to make sense to me. I'm thinking it could be down to SW teaching me how to make healthier choices, and CC to keep it all under control. Fingers crossed I can keep at it this time!

Good luck Susie, you can do it :) I think just staying under 2000 cals is an achievement :) But you can eat a surprising amount for 1580. I am set at 1570, and on a good day I can eat very well and include a few treats.
 
Another good day! 1426 cals so far, going to have a hot chocolate later for 40 cals, so 1466 cals overall for today. Feeling in control more now, I didn't feel like this when I fist went back to SW about 6 weeks ago. I'm looking forward to Friday as it is pay day and I can go shopping for lots of yummy things.

I agree Susie, we will both keep focussed :)
 
Sending you big hugs, Caz; you've had a tough time lately. And I know it's easier said than done, but don't beat yourself up too much. You're doing the best thing and holding yourself accountable. You've said yourself, you know you can do it. I'm the same at the moment; start with good intentions, then let other things get in the way. Chip up; keep looking forwards x
 
Sorry to hear that life is throwing you a curve ball right now Elanor. Really admire you for not throwing the towel in. You have lost 3 stone which is a fab achievement you should be so proud. Even if you stay the same for a bit remind yourself of how well youve done. x
 
Thank you lovelies :) I think I am over the worst of the emotional side of things. Once I know what is going on with my OH I shall be able to finally get myself sorted properly. When I last spoke to him he said he was aiming to come back end of May, so fingers crossed that happens.

Had good news today. I have a job interview for an Admin Assistant role. Complete job change, but I am quite excited. I have to do an admin test and Word test, no idea what they entail, but hopefully I will get through it. This job will mean an initial pay cut, but if I get it then it should be worth it long term.

Cals today have gone, just, over 2000 at 2088. I can live with that! Pay day tomorrow! Then off for the weekend on my parent's narrowboat! 3 days of not worrying about anything!
 
Oooh so much good news - all fingers and toes crossed for the interview! And yaye for pay day :D

Have a lovely time on the narrowboat - I love them, nearly bought one to live on a few years ago.
 
I have been wanting a change for ages, I now have the motivation to do something about it.

I really need this weekend away. We are having a BBQ and there will be lots of alcohol!! I love the narrowboat. It is such a relaxing way to spend a few days. I am lucky that my parents own one.

I am having a very off-plan evening. Shop bought curry, naan bread, samosas and cider!! But, over the weekend there should be a good amount of walking, plus I am using the bank holiday as an excuse :D
 
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