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If you have nothing nice to say ....

S: 18st3lb C: 13st10lb BMI: 28.4 Loss: 4st7lb(24.71%)
Some people make my blood boil! Gah! I need a rant.

Two "family members" are in their mid to late 50's and are overweight or undertall. i am 38 and over tall and overweight.

One of them is usually really lovely and doesn't give two figs what anyone thinks of her or anyone else.

The other is a Hyacinth Bouquet.

I dont see them much but saw them both at a funeral last week. Neither knew I had been following SW as I don't shout it from the rooftops.

Hyacinth has often made comments about my weight in the past and was so offensive just before Christmas last year that there was an audible gasp from the collective family at her "drunken" comment. The comment was not completely drunken as she managed to text me ten mins later to tell me she was joking and to enjoy my meal out. i told her that it would now be a lettuce leaf.

Anyway .... I have lost 4 stone since Christmas and whilst my physical size has not changed alot my overall appearance has, I'm 5 foot 9 with curves, i'm now a large 16 rather than a small 20 that looked 7 montsh pregnant. I dont want to be a size 10 but i have gone from over 18 stone to a little over 14. i think thats pretty good going.

Nice "rfamily member" immediately told me i looked amazingly different and i should have done it years ago, however in the next breath she told me not to lose any more weight because i would look too thin and my hubby doesn't like skinny women. Hyacinth then chirps up that I could lose twice as much weight and never be skinny. i waited for the punchline.... it didn't come but the punch to her face almost did.
Confidence plummet.
So that begs the question ... If you have nothing nice to say why not button it????
My weight loss is nothing to do with anyone but me and how i feel about it.
Rant over.
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Silver Member
S: 17st1lb C: 12st9.5lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 31.4 Loss: 4st5.5lb(25.73%)
You've done amazing, unfortunately there's always that one person each of us know that can put ya down regardless of the situation. Well done on all the loss so far - 4 stone is a huge achievement and you should be praised for it :) xx


Gold Member
S: 19st13.5lb C: 19st10lb G: 17st0lb BMI: 47.4 Loss: 0st3.5lb(1.25%)
One word comes to mind here- jealous!! You have done amazing and I'm sure anybody important to you will tell you that. You know what they say you can choose your friends...... Xx


Full Member
S: 12st5lb C: 11st7lb G: 9st7lb BMI: 29.4 Loss: 0st12lb(6.94%)
Congratulations on how well you've done, to lose that much weight is an incredible achievement.

Ignore your relative - some people like to put others down to make themselves feel better about themselves. As jo-85 says, it's just jealousy. You're doing a fantastic thing and should feel good about yourself.

S: 13st5lb C: 11st0lb G: 11st0lb BMI: 22.1 Loss: 2st5lb(17.65%)
Ugh, what a b****!!!!

I don't have anything constructive to add, but it made me so angry I wanted to pitch in! Consider her cyber-shin-kicked by me: *shinkicksevilrelative*.

You just keep doing what you're doing, you're awesome!

SL x


Silver Member
S: 14st13lb C: 12st7.0lb G: 12st9.0lb BMI: 23.1 Loss: 2st6lb(16.27%)
Well you have proven that your 'bigger' than them by not retaliating with caustic comments of your own, and I am sure you had plenty you could have said.


Full Member
S: 13st4lb G: 9st4lb
I think we all have atleast one member in the family who is like this. I know I do. I just let them get on with it and try to ignore them.x
S: 13st5lb C: 12st3lb G: 7st7lb BMI: 31.3 Loss: 1st2lb(8.56%)
Well, you know you've done a great job and losing 4stones is a HUGE achievement - but some people are miserable and do not like seeing others happy and enjoying their lives. I think this woman doesn't like hereself much and she tries to find faults in others to make her feel better!!
Don't worry and keep losing weight- you are awsome!!!!!!


resident foodaholic
S: 16st7lb C: 16st3.5lb G: 9st5lb BMI: 36.7 Loss: 0st3.5lb(1.52%)
how jealous are they! there's no need, you keep your head held high!
Some people just can't stand others to have success of any kind, she is clearly jealous. I can never understand what make people think they have the right to outright offend people and it always seems to be in front of others too.
It says far more about her than you, you are doing something fantasic for yourself and have done amazingly well, whilst she will always be a miserable old trout!
I too congratulate you on not rising to her vile behaviour and knocking her on her rude ass!


Gold Member
S: 10st4lb C: 10st4lb G: 9st7lb BMI: 27.2 Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
Pah - if they had something nice to say they still wouldn't say it. Some people just don't realise that it makes you feel much better to spread joy than nastiness.

My SIL has always been just like your Hyacinth, but at the last family function I kept waiting or her dose of nastiness to come, and was quite disappointed when it didn't. (They were always such classics). Suddenly she's nice as pie. I think it's because she's finally done something that has given her real confidence in herself (she's trained to be a swimming instructor) and doesn't need to bash everyone elses esteem down to feel up to par herself. Leopards can change their spots, but just don't let their *****iness get you down in the meantime. If you'd turned up looking like a supermodel they'd have still found something to pick holes in.



Silver Member
S: 16st3.5lb C: 15st5lb G: 10st7lb BMI: 36.9 Loss: 0st12.5lb(5.49%)
Unfortunately you are gonna get people that are gonna be jealous because you have lost all that weight. Don't mind them at all, it means they themselves have a really low self-esteem. Losing 4st is a huge achievement and you should be proud of yourself and if you want to lose more you go ahead hun. If it's good for you then it's good for your hubby too. xx
S: 11st7lb C: 10st3lb G: 9st12lb BMI: 23.8 Loss: 1st4lb(11.18%)
Have also had a similar experience giraffegirl.
The bottom line is some people can NEVER be happy for you or your acheivements. You have lost four stone and she hasn't. The only way she can make herself feel better is to say something nasty.

Just ignore her, she is just jealous. And congratulations :)
S: 11st8lb C: 10st9lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 26.4 Loss: 0st13lb(8.02%)
Don't you just love people like that.....NOT! I think you are amazing both for losing 4 stone and for not retaliating back. Well done to you for being the better person and not dropping to her level. Be proud of who you are and what you have achieved and forget and ignore these small minded people who have nothing better to do than put people down. Stand Proud and Tall :D

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