Living in the shadows

suze1310

Full Member
I feel like im living in the shadows of my best friends weight loss. We r doing slimming world me and my 2 best friends and every time we see others we know they always notice how much weight she has lost and how good she looks! I'm so happy for her and she looks fabulous and I can't wait to be as confident as her!
The thing is I have lost more weight than her and I know I weighed 1 stone more than what she did when I started but I'm an after thought it's like Omg how good do u look, uv lost loads of weight and then they'll turn to me and say oh and you lost a bit of weight as well. Why can't I get the same? It does hurt coz im trying my hardest and little things like people noticing and complimenting me without me fishing for compliments that help me continue and everytime I don't get the same or I'm a second thought I doubt myself and think what's the point if u can't notice!
Maybe it's because of how I carry my weight on my bottom half and that's where's its gone compared to my friend where it has gone from her top half where she was bigger but its not like people talk to ur arse and legs and see them first to compliment how much they have shrunk!
 
sending you a hug hon but look how far you have come, try to remember why you are losing the weight and i know its not easy but is it really so everyone else will notice? Have faith in yourself and the confidence will come hon
 
everyone's weight loss goes at different speeds and people's figures change differently as well. It's hard not to compare yourself to others but try to just think about your own achievements and what parts of your own body you are now happier with as a result of your efforts. Besides, if you were to quit now and then your friend got to target and looked amazing and you went back to a size you weren't happy with, how much worse would you feel?! Grit your teeth and keep going mate, we will always have friends who we think everything comes easily to but at the end of the day the time will come when you will look in the mirror and smile :)
 
You know this could be a compliment to you, in that your friend must have looked a right state before to get so many compliments now! ;)
 
Do YOU feel better than before? If the answer is yes, than embrace it, be proud of it, and sod what people say!!! :)

X
 
Haha, I agree with Shirleen ;)

Just a question though, could it be something a simple as the clothes you and your friend are wearing? Are her clothes more fitted/skimpy than yours? Do you wear layers? I know my weight-loss doesn't show nearly as much in some of my outfits than others, just because of their loose cut. No one at work noticed I'd lost weight, to be honest, until the weather got warmer and I ditched the baggy jumper and dress over thick trousers look. It's a lot more obvious I'm slimmer when I'm in a slim-fitting t-shirt and skirt!
 
You have done brilliant on your weigh loss, keep it up! And I agree about the clothing...i prefer loose fitting clothes, but when I wear something a little slimmer fitting, people have defo noticed more.
 
Suze you have done such an amazing job so far - and I really think you have to step back from this and recognise how well you've done. It's great that you and your friend have done this together and are there for each other. Do try to look at the positive things about it and not the negatives ..because they eat us away.

I don't know about anyone else but I'd love to see a before and after photo of you. You'll see then that you have loads of mates on here too that will appreciate what you have achieved.
 
I think you hit the nail on the head with the word 'confident' - is your friend more confident and 'showy' about her loss?? Maybe you're a little shy and not so 'wow, look how well I've done!' - you've done amazingly well hun, don't be disheartened and if it is all about confidence - fake it until you make it! xxxx
 
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