My angry eyes are in!!!

Dolly2

Full Member
This diet can be challenging at certain moments and i am on week 6 now and will admit to struggling. The thought of food (and comfort food as i feel so cold) is overwhelming and even though i have been for a long walk and thinking positive it is an inner battle..........so why does my hubby insist on eating choccy buiscuts infront of me?? He always tells me when he is hungry/ what he has eaten/about to eat/chomps infront of me etc...
Now i do prepare the majority of meals for the family and eat my soups with them but sometimes i just wish he would think a bit :mad:

Rant over, am just in one of those moods where i can't stand the fact that he eats everything and anything, is as thin as a rake and comments on my weight!!
 
why does my hubby insist on eating choccy buiscuts infront of me?? He always tells me when he is hungry/ what he has eaten/about to eat/chomps infront of me etc... and comments on my weight!!

Can I say well done for your weightloss so far - if I read your statistics right then you are a third of the way there!!!.

As for your hubby - what is he playing at? I assume he loves you and wants the best for you, but it does not sound as if he is being supportive at all. Have you told him how bad it makes you feel when he doesn't support you - or worse makes some comment about your weight? You are not that much overweight anyway.

He probably thinks he's being amusing with his antics - he needs to know how demoralising he's being. I wonder if he has areas where he needs support? If he does I bet you give him the support he needs.

If all else fails make a wax effigy of him and buy some very sharp pins. take care xxx.
 
Hmmm..... I agree with Lass. It's disrespectful to say the least and maybe an honest conversation is in order? In a way it may be his way of maintaining/promoting the status quo of his relationship with the old you (without realising) whereas the newly emerging you is someone who values themself resulting in improving boundaries about what behaviour you will accept off others.

Next time he comments on your weight just take a deep breath and say "I feel very hurt when you say things like that". The man should be allowed to have a biscuit with his tea but if he is sitting there commenting about it etc then say the same thing about feeling hurt as it makes you feel as if he is making digs attempts to manage your weight/health. They say always start such conversations with "I feel " as it feels less of an attack and the other person is less likely to go on the defensive.

baggagereclaim.com is a great website about relationships BTW... really good sections about communicating in relationships etc (look in the tags on the left hand side).

I'm sure he just doesn't realise but if he's to stop he needs you to tell him as he's no mindreader.

Good luck

Gg
 
If all else fails make a wax effigy of him and buy some very sharp pins. take care xxx.[/QUOTE]


Thank you, that had me rolling with laughter!!! Am just off to melt down some candles xx
 
Thanks CG
The problem is he purely does not think as he has never had to diet!! Also he is very used to the world revolving around him as he has undergone open heart surgery and suffered a stroke in the past 6 years so support the other way is a non entity.....i wont bore you but this is something i am working on, hence your response with the links of HALT and addictions explain so much more with my food = love relationship....
I have asked him to kindly not comment anymore and possibly munching an entire packed of choccy biccies is not the nicest thing when i have just mentioned how hungry and cold i feel.
I will probably get shot down in flames for this but i truly believe skinny people have no concept at how difficult diets and VLCD can be, with all addictions in life to conquer manage and control them you refrain from them to stop the destructive cycle, but with food we need it to survive!!
Thanks for the link and response
Dolls xxx
 
sending you a very gentle hug. Can you not treat yourself to a CD bar in lieu?
 
I will probably get shot down in flames for this but i truly believe skinny people have no concept at how difficult diets and VLCD can be, with all addictions in life to conquer manage and control them you refrain from them to stop the destructive cycle, but with food we need it to survive!!

Dolls xxx

I think this is true too. They approach food from a completely different reality. The fact that we haven't been able to lose weight through "conventional means" is not because we are weak/have no willpower/are lazy is so far from the mark it's untrue. We have too much baggage around food and that needs to be sorted out while we "abstain" from our drug. VLCDs for us are as close to abstinence as we can get.

Sounds like he's really gotten into the whole "sick role" syndrome over the years which can be tough for those around him.
 
i truly believe skinny people have no concept at how difficult diets and VLCD can be,

I absolutely agree, no-one can understand anything fully unless they have gone through it.

Naturaly thin people have no idea how irritating it is when they say 'helpful' things like, 'It's basic simple common sense, calories in have to be less than calories out and you'll lose weight!' If it were that simple the nation would not be on the verge of a 'fat epidemic'. The good news is that we are all here on MiniMins pulling together to beat the demons.

The best of luck - let me know how the voodoo doll works xxx.
 
Back
Top