need to moan, nothing to do with SW

Discussion in 'Slimming World Off Topic' started by anita1975, 17 September 2010 Social URL.

  1. anita1975

    anita1975 Full Member

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    hi

    Christmas is coming and the mad rush will began.

    We usual have a large family christmas. Mom, Brother, Inlaws and stepson, plus Mother-In-Laws, Brother who was recently widowed.

    For the past 4 years, mom has spent xmas with us. My dad divorced my mom after 40 years of marriage. Christmas is a very hard time for mom, and mom likes a drink so the emotions are increased. Last year my father-in-law was diagnoised with PSP, and my mother-in-law had to cope with the death of her sister-in-law. It was a hard christmas. So to keep my mothers emotions at a low, I only purchased wine for lunch, 3 bottles. She had no thought for the other members. Just moaned all day about dad.

    We have the same amount of family this year visiting. So to make it easier we are going to go for lunch at a local pub. I just rang my mom about this, and mom tells me she is going to my sisters over christmas.

    Never mind that my sister has had no or little interaction with mom, over the past 4 emotional years. Sister never bothers to acknowledges moms birthday, mothersday. My sister also likes to drink.

    Mom has recently sold her house, and as banked a little cash. I'am rather concerned that this, is the only reason my sister has invited my mom. For reasons that are too longwinded, me and my brother do not trust my sister in any way.

    I feel really angry at my mom. We supported her during this emtional time, and now she is dumpping us over christmas. I didn't even get a thanks for having me 4 years before. It was like want do you want and oh go away, you have nothing I can benefit from.

    Sorry just ranting.:mad:
     
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  3. sarah83

    sarah83 I will be a yummy mummy!

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    Not sure what advice I can offer apart from big hugs.
    Might be worth you sitting down with your mom and chatting to her about how you feel, how far away does she live?
    Family frictions are horrible but I hope you can resolve this xxx
     
  4. jaylou

    jaylou Gold Member

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    I can't really offer any advice other than let her do what she wants. It's probably easier on you if she isn't there from what you've said - deep down I'm sure she will be grateful to you for what you have done but if she has made her mind up to go to your sister's then let her go, in my opinion there's no point getting into a row about it.
    ((Hugs))
     
  5. anita1975

    anita1975 Full Member

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    thanks guys, just venting. Family problems been going on for a while. Hubby has just come home from work, and given me the biggest bunch of flowers I have ever seen. Cheered me up.
     
  6. sarah83

    sarah83 I will be a yummy mummy!

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    Ah bless him, bet you've got the biggest grin on your face now!!
     
  7. Derbynanny

    Derbynanny Gold Member

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    Big hugs to you, sometimes you do just need to get it out. Although you are hurt it may be easier to not have your mum there for christmas and let your sister deal with her complaints for a change (i bet mum will be back at yours next year!)

    I have a difficult family and often feel like I am the peacekeeper, and organiser in the family even though I am the baby. I do know exactly how you feel as have had family dramas all week over of all things a funeral !

    Chin up and give that nice hubby of yours a big kiss for the flowers. That is so nice and supportive.
     
  8. anita1975

    anita1975 Full Member

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    thanks for all lovely comments. My stepson, as just turned up from school, finished early as he goes to special needs. Bless him, he wants to take me and his dad out to the pictures. Ah. Stepson said he would pay out of his pocket money. So sweet. Of cause we won't let him pay. But he is so kind. Blessed in more ways than one.
     
  9. xxweemzxx

    xxweemzxx Full Member

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    big hugs :( families are funny things ... i really hope that you sort things out ... I always find a sit down and a good honest chat helps a lot :) xxx
    1353b32a-e4fa-4d5a-a15e-f8af29362702
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  10. fillymum

    fillymum synful soul

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    It sounds like you have lovely family around you.

    Nothing can be resolved or achieved with your mum without sitting down and talking and being honest in what you say. If your brother is concerned get him to be there as well.


    Families can be such a joy they can also be a real pain in the butt at times.
     
  11. anita1975

    anita1975 Full Member

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    thanks to you all good advice. taking mom out shopping next week. will grab a cuppa in a cafe and have a chat. this way should stay calm the both of us. thanks again all.
     
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