No big goodbyes - just sloping off quietly...

[Huseyin]

Anna this really made me feel sad for you. Dont quit now, i know people are telling you its the right thing for you if you are happy but just think of the effort you have put in and how hard you tried, you look amazing in all your pictures and you have done this through sheer will and determination something which im sure you can reclaim.

Think about it this way, a few months down the line, what if you don't loose the weight the way you intended and you further lapse, you then end up like thousands of others who didn't do the RTM phase or finish, you suddenly find yourself back on LL after a year twice the size of what you was. I know three people who have gone down this route of lapsing and not coming back on again, all three are now twice the size.

Now I know its a little extreme what im typing up here but i really do hope this makes you think a few weeks of hardship and tolerance which i know you have! will make you happier in the long run rather then risking it and going on your own.

Think about it if what you propose is to work, it would have worked before you went on LL, the reason you came onto this diet is because what you proposed has not worked for a number of years. dont go full circle Anna.

Besides who else am i going to show my undewear pics to when im done.... hey tell me

 

[slendablenda]

I agree with H

H I seem to be agreeing with everything you say this morning.

Anna, I have a freind at work who did LL before I joined the office about 2 years ago and lost about 10 stone.
She tells me that she succumbed to other people's opinions about 1.5stones away from her goal and stopped, thinking she could complete the last little bit on her own. They all said she was either looking FAB and needed to stop, or she was looking scrawny and they were only concerned for her because they didn't want her to get ill. etc,etc,.
She has since put it all back on plus more.
I feel so sorry for her because unwittingly I've come along and succeeded which must be so hard. She has been very nice to me about it, but can't get back on track at all.She's tried CD quite a few times this year, but has such a sense of failure she just can't do it.
Please be careful I've heard this kind of story so many times, butI have actually seen it with this person.

 

[Poppysparkle]

I hesitated in posting yesterday because I felt just like Slenda and H but just couldn't find a way of putting it without sounding unsupportive. They got it spot on!

I'm worried for you I have to admit - I know so many people who have done LL and the ones that have kept the weight off are the ones that completed RTM. Everyone, and I mean everyone, who didn't do RTM and stopped just before the end by giving in to other people's opinions, or just thinking that they only have a stone left to lose and would now be able to do it themselves have put the weight back on and with added padding in some cases!

I was thinking last week of stopping half a stone before my original goal weight that I set when I started out, and now I realise that this was for the wrong reasons. Partly my group all have about a stone left to lose, so I thought I could stop before goal at 10 1/2 stone instead of 10. People in work and at home tell me constantly, EVERY SINGLE DAY, that I've now lost enough weight and have to stop or I'm going to start looking scrawny/ill/unhealthy. But I'm not ready to stop myself, I realised that, there are still bits that I'm unhappy with and although I'm now a size 12 (unheard of for most of my adult life) I still feel there's about another stone that I could easily afford to lose, plus half a stone for a little bit of comfortable leeway while doing RTM. In one way, I'm ready to stop abstinence and start RTM, but then I am also a bit nervous about this and happy to put it off a while yet!

I absolutely realise that you have been struggling, but I just read the Gillian Riley book and it made so much sense to me in that I absolutely have choice over what I do, or in fact what I put in my mouth. There is no overriding physiological urge that will make me eat something. I absolutely have control and that's really empowering.

I really wish that I could make it easier for you and stop you struggling. You literally have a matter of weeks to go to get to goal and those weeks will absolutely fly by!!! Every other member of my group is doing exactly the same thing and struggling since they ate at Xmas and I so feel for them, but they do have it in their control to grab this with both hands and go for gold!

Please Anna, think again. Obviously I wish you EVERY success whatever you decide to do.

XX

 

[Huseyin]

SB - we have seen it ourselves and you know what they say about great minds thinking alike.

PS - sometimes there is no way of putting it other then just telling the person the reality of the situation.

We are all worried about her putting it all back on ultimately.

 

[westiegirl]

I must say I agree wholeheartedly with Huseyin, SB and PS. I wanted to write that last night but I too do didn't want to seem unsupportive.

I know what it's like - I've lived it. Like I said last night - stopping LL before I was ready was the worst thing I have ever done. Unfortunately I was forced to stop because I moved 300 miles from my group and there was no group where I live now back then, given the choice I would not have left.

If you can learn anything at all from people like me who have struggled and put weight back on, it's to use the resources you have available to you and your LLC is one of the best tools you have.

Please don't think I'm being unsupportive because like everyone else on here I think you have done so well and a few more weeks to complete the journey is nothing in the scale of your lifetime xxx

 

[SerenityValley]

Just seen this now.

Am really sorry that its become so hard for you, for so long and I support your decision, because I know it's what is right for you.

Keep in touch honey,

love,
Andy xxx

 

[annaphylactic]

Thanks Andy...

I am not discounting the opinions of the rest of you, but it made me really upset reading all those posts - I know that many people that don't do RTM put the weight back on, but I just want to see how I get on. I am not under the impression I'm never going to gain an ounce again, but I need to distance myself from the programme that has haunted me since around 11th December. I know I can't expect wholehearted support on here all the time, and I know that what I am planning to do is contraversial, but I have literally reached my limit and can't cope anymore.

I am struggling in my career, my relationship etc... I have major exams next week, and I just need to put dieting, shakes, abstinence, lapsing etc out of the equation and get on with passing.

I am going to source a personal trainer in the next couple of days who will work me to death (not literally!) as well as following a low GL/GI way of eating (with limited carbs).

Like I say, I have a strict window - if I start to slip, I will be coming back and seeing it through - this is just an experiment.. and it's not like I am falling off the wagon - I've eaten every day for nearly two months already (often with no packs) and I've not put on anything so far... lucky perhaps, but I think I know what I need to do, and not do... who knows - I'll see how I get on.

I've not told my LLC yet - I will mail her later - feel more guilty about giving up for the sake of my LLC, than for myself! Weird.

Anna x

 

[vintella]

hi anna
just wanted to say that it looks like you've really thought about this decision, i can understand why people worry that leaving ll can lead to a return to old habits but sometimes such strict diets can become something of a problem in themselves. i have been very aware the whole way through that certain elements of the restrictiveness can feed into my eating disorder issues of old- i imagine if you do lapse then these only become harder to deal with.
we all worry because we care about you and although ll works for many it wont for all--- not saying it hasnt helped you loads already
take some time out you really do deserve it
sending you lots of hugs
ella
x

 

[slendablenda]

Sorry Anna

Don't like to upset you. It's only because we care.
Good luck. You are still the same vibrant
intelligent person, whatever. xxxx

 

[westiegirl]

I'm sorry too, and maybe I'm a bit biased because I was one of those people who put weight back on and I was speaking from my position of experience.

It was one heck of a struggle for me but we cannot walk in another's shoes and therefore say what will or won't happen as a result of a decision made by someone else.

My only aim was to hopefully save you from the feeling like I did but you have obviously thought about this long and hard and have got a plan of action in place.

I will step back from this thread now as I don't wish to upset you further (I'm upset to have upset you ) but just wish to offer my 100% support on your next step and what I said yesterday still stands true - don't be a stranger because there is a lot of us on here that care about you x

 

[annaphylactic]

It's ok... don't want to upset you for upsetting me when you were trying to help... haha (what a conundrum!)

I think I took it to heart because it has been exactly that, a really tough decision... and I have fears that I will put back on some weight - hearing it from so many of you was a tough pill to swallow - but I never for one second imagined it came from anywhere except support and care.

We'll see what happens... no grand plan - just taking it one day at a time. The exercise is going to be the big one, if I can make that a 'habit' and part of my lifestyle, it should definitely help!

Anna xx

 

[westiegirl]

Oh dear, lets get off the upset-a-go-round Conundrum solved!

It was said out of concern but I think I just forgot that we are all different and just because I couldn't cope with something, it doesn't mean you won't.

One day at a time is an excellent way forward and doing it that way (and definately including exercise) I think you'll crack it

Sarah xxx

 

[Blonde Logic]

Anna - at the end of the day, if your own regime starts to go anywahere but where you want it to - you can always come back. It's such a personal decision - and yes, ALL comments here wer from the heart of course, but nothing is cast in stone.... So if you find you need LL - you come back. If you find you don't = BONUS!

You know where we are, and you're an honorary member anyway - so - you keep us in the loop if you like, or if you need anything.

xx

 

[Poppysparkle]

Anna, huge apologies for upsetting you! I genuinely do wish you the very, very best of luck! I also realise that you are not me and I should not project my fears and anxieties about my own journey on to you.

All the best and I so hope you are successful. You are a beautiful lady and just glowing at the moment, so I'm sure you'll sustain this!

PS - I am not quite sure that I believe you haven't got through to the next stage of BB!! LOL!! How could they resist?!

 

[roundrachel]

anna, i didn't get to goal on LL and I didn't get to the end of RTM (went off the rails mid november)

I did however get to goal mid January (I had another stone to lose) through exercise and a low GI diet. The exercise bit is tough to start with but it's a habit worth getting into.

I still go back to my LLC to get weighed and buy drink flavouring (can't resist that fruits of the forest!)

What I'm saying in a round about way is that I did exactly the same as you are doing and it's worked. I have my treats, the odd glass of wine, but I can run 7 miles a day and am planning a marathon next year (a little excessive maybe but I never did things by halves!!)

Good luck with the rest of your journey. If you want it, you'll do it. The main thing is not to feel bad about going 'off track'. LL has worked for you up to a certain point, and I'm sure the next bit will work too...

I'm sure we all want to see you goal undies pics!!

Take care and all the best xx

 

[slendablenda]

Well done Rachel, glad it's worked for you.
Love, Slenda xxx

 

[roundrachel]

Thanks slenda...still swear by LL for breaking the back of it all though and will be preaching the LL way to anyone who'll listen lol.

You're still looking great!! x

 

[nexangelus]

The exercise is going to be the big one, if I can make that a 'habit' and part of my lifestyle, it should definitely help!

This is the key, bang up the exercise and that will help loads...good luck, very brave to go it alone. I did it twice (lighter life in 2000 and lipotrim in 2003) and put some weight back on but then I took the principles I had learned and here I am today after losing weight my own way the third time (third time lucky?!) working my own maintenance plan...have only maintained for almost 10 months, but exercise has really really helped me.

 

[babs11]

good luck anna, i came off ll early dec. tried cd and ww but they weren't for me.
i'm now half a stone lighter than my final ll weigh in. i just try to be careful most of the time and eat a little of what i fancy, going gym lots and enjoying it and although i want another stone off i'm so much happier than i was pre ll that i'm not going to let that last stone eat me up, iykwim!!
as far as i'm concerned you cant stay on ll forever and at some point we all have to take responsibilty for our own eating habits, we can analyse all we like about why we overeat but the answers alone wont stop us doing it.
all the best, you're a beautiful girl
xx

 

[annaphylactic]

Thanks Babs ... I hope I fall into your category and not the 'piles it all back on' one!!

I went to the gym this afternoon and one of the guys there has offered to give me 'personal trainer' one on one sessions three times per week for free, so that's brill! I really enjoyed the workout today, and am weirdly excited about going back on Weds, Fri and Sat... might even cram in a class on Thurs too!

I then went and walked my mum's dog, so all in all it's probably been one of my more active days in the last, errrrm, well, twenty years? Haha!!

Anyway - I digress. I think I have put on a pound already (according to my scales a few moments ago), but i am putting that down to eating properly, not having any "movements" in a while, and doing lots of weights training today. We'll see...

After trying not to weigh myself for so long on LL, I'm now being careful to keep an eye on myself in case I start to slip.

xx