NooNoo's diary.....feeling good again now!!

[NooNoo1970]

Well i guess this is more for my own point of view than anyone elses..I need to prove to myself that I can do this weight loss thing and I can and will be able to maintain and stop those old habits coming back! I know I can loose the weight... at the end of the day I am 3st3lb lighter than I was 3 months ago!

I decided a few days ago to start eating again as we are going on holiday and I know I will want to eat while we are away, so started to have some salad and little bits of carbs etc...well its opened a whole can of worms and I have been as bad as ever, and eating just for the sake of it

I am so dissapointed with myself...and I havent even gone away yet.
I think having a whole life with food in the equation would be so much easier. !!

Anyway I have got up this morning got on the scales and they show a 4lb gain..now I know this is body weight rather than 4lb of fat...but its really bad to think this has gone on in a space of 24/48 hrs.

I know I dont look any different but I feel like my face has got fat and I have gained about a stone! stupid head I know...why do we do this to ourselves??????

Anyway I got up and tried on my new dress that I bought the other day....phew it still fits ...I cant have gained that much(obviously..but the brain is a very stupid thing at times!!! well mine is anyway!)

Well I have 5 whole days till my next wi so i am going to drink ....water...shake..water ...water...shake...water...
water.....shake....water water water etc etc

I still have 7days till we go away so I know I can get myself back in to CD mode..properly. I cant and wont let myself go back to my old ways on a tempory and deffo not permenant basis now way hosay!! I have come too far for that. I love being slimmmer and I love the way it makes me feel about myself....so I am not going to let a few carbs or choc biscuits or sweets take over my life again as they did before...I am the boss here...I rule myself 'they' dont!!!

I am very scared that 'they' will get a grip of me again like they did before...but I know I need to be strong..and enjoy being slimmer and realise how far I have come and how I feel now. Besides all of that I have given away all the my big clothes !!!

Anyway off to get my brekkie shake and oh ..another water!
If anyone has read this..please forgive my ramblings..but I needed to air how I feel !

LouX

 

[jfc]

Hi Lou

Think Positive Hun, You have done incredibly well so far and only have such a short way to go...although I confess the hard work is maintainng rather than losing. I am ashamed to admit I regained 4 stone over a period of 7 months after reaching target last year...through my own stupid thought..It was almost as if I felt the diet had vaccinated me against overeating and gaining weight...unfortunately I found out to my downfall that that isnt the case....I am determind to go for it again...I am on day 6 now and shifted 5 pounds already so no it is possible to get back on track just make sure you stand firm on your return from your holiday and get right back on the diet.

Love

Jennyxx

Have a lovely holiday btw

 

[NooNoo1970]

still on track (only been 7hrs!!)

Thanks for that Jenny. I deffo agree that the maintainence will be the hardest bit about this journey!

Had a good day so far...had shake this am..only just..was about 11.45!! have had loads of water and juts had a bar for lunch. Chatterbox stuck her ore in a while ago saying it didnt matter if I ate as I am on hols in less than a week..but I told her to sod off as I didnt want to go away weighing more than I do now!! I might not get back into Ketosis before hols but I do want to stay on control of my eating.
So had another water and then bar.

Oldest son has gone round to his friends so me and the youngest are just off swimming. OH is asleep on the sofa..had a very late night last night with far too much Boddingtons!! and normally i would be making him do something ..self inflicted pain gets 0 sympathy in our house...BUT he starts back on nights tonight so will let him off for today

Anyway staying strong and focused........have a good afternoon all!

Hugs lou XX

 

[jfc]

My chatterbox has been on at me today too...I was making dinner for the family and cutting up french bread,buttering it to put in the middle of the table for them to use mopping up their spag bol...which I made specialy for everyone except me!

I was happily buttering away, when my chatterbox started on at me....Jen..jen...go on one piece wont hurt, your only on day 6 you can start again tomorrow....

At which I glugged on my iced water..slammed the plate on the table and stuck two fingers up at my chatterbox....

Feeling pleased with myself....but I know she will be back for with more temptatons to lead me astray....

Jennyxx

 

[DQ]

Well done Jen - one battle won!

 

[NooNoo1970]

feeling good again!!

Well after a few days of being so off the rails I cant describe! ! I decided to turn to good old WW to loose the last 1 1/2 stone!

So I started on ww NC and signed up for the online variety yesterday and have been fine ever since. Also this way i can go on hols and eat but stay in control.

I am really happy with the decisions I have made...so glad that I found CD a few months back I am not even able to put it in words!

But I now feel I need to move on and start eating again and facing the food demons in every day life.

I will still come back here and DH and keep posting and let you know how I am going...I did brave the scales this am and they showed a 4lb gain...but I guess being as though I had couscous yesterday and so much crap over the weekend its just glycogen.

Anyway must dash minded children here today...been for a walk already this am..and then mine finally break up from school today at 2pm..so that will be it all systems go!!

hugs to all Lou X