Notes to self

Elemental

Chasing the Rainbow
S: 17st4lb C: 14st8lb G: 10st10lb Loss: 2st10lb(15.7%)
Hi All,

Am probably mad starting my diet just before xmas - i am also starting it on friday! Just to be different, i'm always "starting my diet on monday" i cram as much into my mouth as possible like there is literally going to be no tomorrow. Its all gonna be different this time, here's one idea how...

My hubby is a gem, but such a soft touch, when i crave food i am like a junkie needing a fix, i start off cheeky and mischievious, then i get grumpy and sulky, then depressed or angry, i have actually had full on crying tantrums before just because him telling me no just feels like he is telling me i am not allowed to have what i want because i am fat and don't deserve it, then i have all these feelings of him not fancying me, then what a let down i am, then it just spirals, he niaively thinks i am crying cos i am not allowed a pizza.............he wants me to tell him how i feel but some stuff is just too painfull to talk about when you are already in a state.

ANYWAY *deep breath*

Why am i letting food take over me like this? I have a degree in counselling for goodness sake, so after a really unsuccessful session with another counsellor who is nowhere near as good as i would have been if i'd carried on my career (lol) i decided to therapise myself CBT style.

The kitchen is going to be locked, i am diet chef so portions are controlled for me. The age old "we've got nothing in to eat and we're too tired to shop or cook so let's get a take away" is abolished as my meals are all set out for me. Once last thing......i want to give my husband some "notes to self" that he can hand me when i have an episode. These notes will be from me, to me. Telling me why i shouldnt eat, reminding me that my husband loves me, and that i am fat cos i emotionally over eat, i shouldnt emotionally over eat cos i am fat..........to break the cycle.

Thing is i am stuck for wise words, lacking inspiration, any inspiring sayings or mantras that you could share to inspire me?
 
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elm

Gold Member
S: 316.4lb C: 241.2lb G: 137lb BMI: 40.1 Loss: 75.2lb(23.77%)
Good luck and stay strong
 




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