O/T - some opinions about pregnancy!!

irishchub

Full Member
Keep it a secret (!) but myself and my dh would both love another bubs, my dd was 2 in June and gets really lonely with no other children for company, I know she'd make a great big sister and my dh is a brilliant daddy but I have a few things holding me back, gonna list dem and all opinions are welcome!!

1. I'm afraid of the dynamic in the house shifting - the 3 of us are doing great just the 3 of us, what if I dont love a new baby the same way as my dd, or what if she gets jealous cos she wont be the centre of attention anymore etc? Is that fair?

2. Since my first pregnancy I have lost 2 1/2 stone, I am soooooooo frightened to put it back on again and to put my weight loss on hold when Im feeling so motivated about it right now.

3. I will have to give up my wee p/t job as we would not be able to afford childcare, will I be ok without adult company for x amount of years?!?!

4. I suffered really badly with pnd after my dd was born, will I really be able to cope with 2??

Sorry for the rant - Im probably coming across really selfish but its floating around in my head and thought id let it out!!
 
I think these are worries everyone has but never voices, as my Nana used to say it all come out in the wash
1) being a only child is awful, being one of more can be awful at times my kids fight, I might pull my hair out, but I have been through hell to get my last little boy and he is our special little man and its wonderful.
2)Weight is weight yes its a shame to put it on but honestly a baby is a wonderful gift.
3) Adult company yes I miss it but then I gossip online, I pop to another mums after the school run.
4)PND is a horrid thing but you might not get it, your family will know what to look for and you will realised quicker and get help quicker.

I would love a large family and can't due to medical reasons, I never thought I'd manage to have another baby, (lost 2 very late in pregnancy) but honestly he is worth every worry stress and pain I suffered.
3)
 
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Okay, each question one at a time...

1) Yes of course the dynamics will change, but it is SO good for child no.1 to have a younger sibling. They have a companion, they learn to share and despite the squabbling (plenty in my house!), they love their new bro/sis very dearly, which is a joy to see.

2) Personally speaking, I would never let the weight thing hold me back. If you are fairly careful during the pregnancy (which I was both times!) then you shouldn't put on excessive weight. Post-baby, with a combination of healthy eating, exercise and possibly breastfeeding, the weight should come off fairly quickly.

3) I sympathise about you having to give up the p/t job. Having gone from full-time teacher, to p/t teacher, I am now a full time Mmmy to 2 little ones and yes, I do miss the adult company of work. I try to meet up with friends as often as possible to keep me sane!!

4) I couldn't possibly advise you about PND as I have no experience of it. I can imagine that if you have been through it once, it would be a worry.

Well that's my advice, if you choose to take it! But seriously, I have now got a little boy, who is almost 4 and a little girl of 18 months. It is exhausting and some days can be really hard-going, but I adore them both and they bring us limitless amounts of joy!

Hope that helps a little!

xx
 
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