oh no!! i did something terrible!!

[alicethecamel]

oh for goodness sake... so here's what happened last night...

all day normal... just one pack left for the evening...

then at home, i was trying to make my coffee mousse but was distracted and my whisk broke so i did it wrong at got huge lumps of mousse mix... ugh.

i had an EXTRA vanilla pack and for some unknown reason, decided to add it?! A fifth pack?! THEN bcos i'd been messing about so long, i got really hungry and totally lost my mind and ATE TWO EXTRA NEW TOFFEE BARS AND AN EXTRA VANILLA SHAKE???!!!! so yesterday i ended up eating EIGHT PACKS!!!

i'm in my 23rd week, i've lost 7 stone and half one and a half, maybe two stone, to go until i finish. i haven't cheated once. this is my first unruly episode.

why did i do it?? i don't know what came over me.

the only upside is that i cheated on foodpacks so i still haven't eaten a conventional food during abstinence... but still... ugh!! eight packs?? mental!!

just had to share.

:cry: :sigh: :break_diet:

xx

 

[Spanglymum]

Oooh I so hear you! I was so upset last night at my first-ever gain since starting the programme (ok so it was infinitesimally small but I was still upset) that I ATE TWO BARS ON THE WAY HOME FROM GROUP! So yesterday, I had five packs (and a meal - I'm on Lite now).

23 weeks is a phenomenal achievement - as is 7.5 stone! Try not to be too angry with yourself. And here's a hug for good measure.

 

[alicethecamel]

Aaah, thank you for the hug!! Even though after my four extra food packs i bet you wouldn't get your arms round me

how annoying is it that even after all this time in abstinence, we still turn to food?? the old behaviour is still there under the surface...

but i do feel much better so thank you very much for your message. let's not do it again!!

xxxxxxxxx

 

[alicethecamel]

oh!! and one more thing, spanglymum - are you going to eat one less pack today? or just draw a line and move on?

i'm not sure whether to try to make up for it and eat three packs for four days, or whether to just carry on normal.

what do you think?

xxxxxx

 

[Jane23]

HI Alice

First of all well done 23wk and 7.5st is an inspiration x

I'd personally draw a line under it and move on. Your extra food packs can't quite remember off the top of my head are about 500 cals. You will not have done a lot of damage you will have had approx 1000cal that day (still well under 2000 for average woman daily in take). Your only problem is you might have had too much carbs abd come out of ketosis so could feel a bit hungry today XXXXXX

 

[Twinny]

Awww I wouldnt beat yourself up about it. Unfortunately, the old behaviours still lurk under the surface for all of us and its trying to not let them break through that is the biggest lesson we have to learn. (Look at me, lost 8 stone 3 yrs ago, put it all back on, now here I am again) At least you only had packs and not food. I wouldn't cut down the amount of packs you have today to try to compensate though - just carry on with the normal 4 a day

 

[alicethecamel]

Thanks Twinny!! I think you're right - i'm going to just go back to normal 4 a day. That way, I can stop dwelling on it and move on.

Do you mind me asking if you did the RTM programme the first time you did LL? Did you get to goal and then put it back on?

I'm only asking bcos my LLC is convinced that nobody who does RTM ever puts any weight back on and I'm wondering if he's right!!

Thanks again xx

 

[Spanglymum]

I'm just going to draw a line and move on. It's my first lapse since I started so no good getting myself upset about it. Interesting, though, that the behaviour is still there...

 

[Twinny]

Thanks Twinny!! I think you're right - i'm going to just go back to normal 4 a day. That way, I can stop dwelling on it and move on.

Do you mind me asking if you did the RTM programme the first time you did LL? Did you get to goal and then put it back on?

I'm only asking bcos my LLC is convinced that nobody who does RTM ever puts any weight back on and I'm wondering if he's right!!

Thanks again xx

I'm sorry to say this Alice but I did do the whole 12 weeks of RTM and followed it to the letter. I wish I could use that as an excuse as to why I put it back on but all I can't. It was purely old habits creeping back and me not noticing or rather, choosing not to notice. I didn't stack it all on straight away and my favourite stupid line was "well I'm not as big as I was before am I, I'll never get like that again". Stupid crooked thinking.

ANYWAY, I didn't learn to tell the time or how to walk first time either, I fell over lots and picked up a few bruises along the way. I just need to take all the help my counsellor can give and start to learn my lessons again and hope they stay with me this time.

I don't mean to say all this to dishearten you, most people lose the weight and keep it off, others like me need a bit more work but I know this is the way forward for me...

 

[alicethecamel]

I think you're absolutely right about that - there aren't many things we do perfectly first time and expecting a lifetime's habits just to go away and die in 12 weeks is probably a bit unrealistic for a lot of people!! It's wonderful that you're back here and on your way back to where you want to be, weight-wise. I think you have a fabulous attitude towards it. Good luck and well done you for refusing to give up!! Xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[LadyT]

Twinny, love the way you put that so true! x

 

[Twinny]

I hope I manage to succeed this time....we're all in this together x

 

[Pearl77]

Twinny that is so true, and a lovely way to put it, how are you getting on? I start again tomorrow, very excited x