Sabotage

k-nine

Full Member
Hi all,
I have been posting on the restarters forum spasmodically over the past few weeks but I wanted to raise an issue with you all.

At the end of last year, I lost about 1.5 stone and I have put about half of that on. When I am about 11 stone, I am a 12-14 and happy with my lot. When I am 11.5 stone (where I am now), I am a 14-16 and unhappy with my lot. Over the last 6 months, I have been losing and putting that half stone on.

This is the odd thing. If I have something special to go to and really want to lose weight for it, I start off really well. But as the event gets closer, I start to binge and put it on again. Does anyone understand where I am coming from?

I am a fairly well balanced mature lady - in fact, I am quite motivated and well disciplined in other areas of my life. I prefer to be slim for myself and for my DH. So what's going on here? :sigh:

Any views appreciated.

Jools
x
 
didnt want to read and run hun, ive not got to a point where i m happy yet so cant really comment , im still trugging along to goal.

good luck hun.xx
 
My questions for you would be:

Do you think you don't deserve to lose the weight?
Are you scared to lose it?

Being that bit heavier can make us feel safer - or it can be an internal punishment. Either of them apply?

It's interesting that the weight gain mechanism swings into action at that particular point. What are you thinking about that sets it off? Is it...What you are going to wear? Who is going to notice you? etc etc...
 
I completely understand where you are coming from. Historically I tend to start my diets around September time, lose loads of weight, look pretty good by May time, and then with holidays approaching, stuff my face stupid. The closer the holiday the more I eat. I am obese in every holiday photo, others take of me! Self destruct button methinks!
 
For me, I always ahve a 6 week panic,.... I loose weight, I see a difference and 'fall' off the wagon...
I have always been big and have had lots of stuff happen in my life.. It took me a long time to realise that as someone said earlier, I didn't think I deserved it....
I think I am now at a point where I am begining to like myself...
It's not always easy to understand why we do things, many of us have self destruct buttons, but it is important to try to find out why or you can go round and round in circles forever....
Good luck with this journey.... You do deserve to be slim...
x
 
Thanks for your comments ladies. Certainly not scared to lose it. Do I deserve to lose it - hell, yes!!!n Guess I need to concentare on the solution rather than the problem. I'll let you know if I find it :rolleyes:

Jools
x
 
I get where your coming from. I found that if I sign up to challenges etc.. for weight loss that I always feel pressure to lose, and that is enough to send me on a binge. Even if its for a night out, I'll lose a bit, feel great and lose the plot. I think its the pressure thing for me, that I have a reason to do it but feel that its too much. Now I don't sign up to challenges, do my best for nights out and try not to pressure myself to lose weight.
 
This is the odd thing. If I have something special to go to and really want to lose weight for it, I start off really well. But as the event gets closer, I start to binge and put it on again. Does anyone understand where I am coming from?

I am a fairly well balanced mature lady - in fact, I am quite motivated and well disciplined in other areas of my life. I prefer to be slim for myself and for my DH. So what's going on here? :sigh:

Any views appreciated.

Jools
x

Could have written this myself!!! I have no advice to offer as I am confused as to why I do this myself but just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in doing this

xxx
 
I have been doing exactly that for the past month! I lost the bulk of my weight for my friends wedding on 25 August and was really pleased with myself. However, I have re-started a countless number of times to shed the remainder of my weight. problem is I now have the extra 4 pounds I put on since August to shed too! I find myself sabotaging myself and I don't understand why either. I agree that it is is is the solution that needs to be concentrated on and not the problem.
 
i agree with the 'too much pressure' issue...

maybe as the event gets closer we are not happy with our loss and as we are not going to achieve what we originally wanted (ie goal weight for a certain date/ holiday/ event etc) then we feel completely let down and punish ourselves.

now i dont put so much pressure on myself, i allow myself a day off a week and worry less about how quickly i lose weight.

so what i would say is apply less pressure to yourself, dont set goals if they dont work for you. just appreciate the losses as they are and dont compare them to anything, ie what you could've lost/ wanted to lose.

hope this makes sense, just relax a bit more and im sure you will get to goal x
 
Yes, the pressure thing makes sense to me. My best friend tells me that this is what the problem is. Anyway, I'm away for the weekend so no diets for me until Monday. Then I'm going to have one more go - but no pressure - and see where that takes me. Good luck to you all.
Jools
x
 
Guess I need to concentare on the solution rather than the problem. I'll let you know if I find it :rolleyes:

Jools
x

Yep. Exactly. You'll find it if you want it enough. Promise :)
 
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