Slimmer's Envy

[Scanbran]

Does anyone else get this?

It's a term I made up so I don't know if it's accurate, but I think it describes how I feel

I'm about halfway through my weight-loss journey, and it's taken about 5 months so far. After about 3/4 months, people at work not only started to notice a difference, but openly started to comment, which I'll admit I quite liked

I also liked the attention and questions I was getting.
Now there are three other people in my office 'dieting', two of them following Slimming World, and the comments in the kitchen are all about how they've 'lost 7lbs', and 'can you see a difference?'. Another two people have told me they now want to lose weight as well!

I know I should feel proud of the influence I've had, and it should be inspiring, but a small, nasty part of me still wants all the attention and praise

On a serious note, it's incredible how much of an impact that a close-up and personal weight loss can have on those around you, and really it's a fantastic feeling to know that I have had a part to play in several people changing their eating habits

 

[Happytigger]

Oh yes, there is a big part of us that has this feeling. I have a friend of mine who is now using the same Personal Trainer as me and is catching me up with the inch loss and I think - hey slow down, its me in the lead.

But at the end of the day what you (and all of us) have to remember is how well we have done and if we have influenced others to also start loosing then that is a good think.

We always need to always make a positive out of sometimes a negative thought. Or as i say to the little children that I walk with "think happy thoughts".

Again well done on how well you have done so far.

 

[Lonestitcher]

I do. Not in RL (as only ONE person -who didn't know that I was dieting- has noticed that I've lost 4 STONES!!!!!!), but on here.

Never when people say how much they've lost or if they've had a good week (I LOVE the fact that we can come on here and brag about how well we've done!!!), but more when I'm just reading ordinary threads..... I sometimes look at peoples stats and notice that 'They've lost more than me, quicker' etc. It's very easy to get disheartened.

I know that different people lose at different rates (and I know that I've lost more than other people in the same space of time) but sometimes it is a bit of a blow to the ego, especially when I'm feeling at my most smug!!!!

 

[Scanbran]

Thanks happytigger

I think I don't want my achievement to be overshadowed or diluted with other people 'jumping on the bandwagon' so to speak, but that is plain daft really.

For one thing, I got myself into this mess, so shouldn't be backslapping myself too much just because I think I'm finally getting out of it.
For another thing, I should be proud and happy that my efforts have inspired others to be healthier, and in a way, I am.

Still irritated, though

 

[prawnchopSuey]

I think it's the same sentiment that makes people of healthy weight tell us 'diets are are waste of time' and that 'you're fine just the way you are', 'you don't need to lose weight' etc.
No-one likes people to be better than them at anything, even if they don't want to feel that way.

Just human nature really and we're all a bunch of nasties at heart

 

[gemma_]

I started this diet and my cousin joined another slimming world couple weeks after who as always been a big girl, anyway sh asn't had children so as all time in world to go gym etc and she's lost triple amount i have and I do feel miserable about it! i know that sounds really selfish.

 

[wakemeupalready]

I know exactly how you feel! I lost 6 stone on another diet (WW ahhhem!!) and the compliments you get at the very beginning when people start to notice is amazing! talk about making you feel fantastic, but i understand when the focus is taken off you and on to someone else.

But you got to focus on how well you have done or else is just consumes you lol.

 

[cocktailprincess]

Scanbran, mate- this is not a sign of being mean. It is just a sign of being incredibly honest and human. I bet we have all had these thoughts, but sometimes if you don't show a million percent encouragement and joy for others losing weight it can make you feel like a bad person.

I have been on the giving AND receiving end of these feelings. My friend started dieting a couple of months after I started SW because she was so pleased for me and it encouraged her. She got to target about a year ago and I am still going, and I am delighted but still sometimes feel like a right old plodder who STILL hasn't got there

On the other hand I started doing SW about a year after my sister started WW. I have now lost more than her and she still has a long way to go to target and I am nearly there. I can see from her face that she is fighting with pleased/dissapointed when we tell each other how we got on each week. She makes jokey coments about it being unfair but I really understand that it upsets her a little- so much so that I almost get glad when I tell her i had a bad week (e.g. this week) because I know it will make her feel better about herself.

Wow- so much head messing involved in this. This brings out our urges to be more attractive/successful/capable/in control/hard working than people around us- this is caveman stuff, mate- inbred in us for millions of years so don't stress. As long as your friends and colleagues never get wind of your diet envy, you shouldn't worry about perfectly natural feelings that are beyond your control

xxxxx

 

[IanH]

ScanBran - be proud of what you've achieved - you turned your life around and you deserve your bragging rights as much as they deserve their bragging rights for their decision to turn their life around. but have a bit of extra pride that it you that helped to inspire them to take their journey.

but remember that these journeys are all individual and got our their own paces - and not to get jealous if someone appears to be overtaking - either in weightloss or how many people notice/compliment.


.

 

[blissfulbabe]

It's totally human to feel this way - even if we think we shouldn't.

One of my colleagues started SW after I did - she doesn't know I joined because I've kept it quiet - and keeps everyone informed of her progress. She's doing really well and most of the time I feel pleased for her but when I've STS despite being good all week and she's lost another 4lbs the ol' green eyed monster raises its ugly head. On Monday I actually thought about putting sugar rather than sweetener in her coffee! Oh, the shame!!!

 

[MadameLaMinx]

I totally had a spell of this. My son and my MIL both took up losing weight after seeing how well I was doing, and they both had pretty good results from the getgo. Unfortunately, at the time they did that, I hit a wall and was being all apathetic and grr about losing weight (before I hit the point where I decided to join SW to get the focus back) and it just made me worse, my son would come in all happy because he had shed a few more pounds and I was sticking and was secretly quite grumpy about everyone elses success.

It makes me quite ashamed to think about it now, but I am very glad this thread came up, because at least I know I am not alone in having these grumbles, and they are only grumbles, temporary fleeting things. They soon pass.