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So Many Jealous People Out There!

#1
Isn't it amazing how many people totally struggle to acknowledge your weight loss. Almost 3 stone down and from a size 20 to a loose 14 and almost everyone has complimented me but there are the few who cannot bring themselves to say it. I think its really funny. Not that i'm looking for compliments but my boss ,who's no stranger to a cream cake, looks me up and down all the time then quickly looks away when i catch her but never once has commented. There are a few others like her too. Then there is the other extreme and people who make you feel GREAT and tell you every time they clap eyes on you how great you look! :D Its all very amusing how you would never believe how much of a green eyed monster some people are.
 
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Camille

Silver Member
S: 20st7lb C: 17st6lb G: 15st7lb Loss: 3st1lb(14.98%)
#3
Like you said, so many jealous people! Well done you must be so chuffed x
 
#4
i know, and i find their silences scream, im jealous i wish it was me, it doesnt cost anything to say you look good! or well done but they are unable to speak almost with envy . hope i never act like that .xxx
 

BREN

is going to loose!
S: 83kg C: 80.8kg G: 72kg BMI: 27.9 Loss: 2.2kg(2.68%)
#5
Shazzy

To true..... and we all know why!

Your hot and they haven't got the "balls" (sorry if offended anyone!) to get off their backsides and take control of their own lives.

I'm extremely glad I don't live their life having to bottle all my feelings, thoughts and energy into being a miserable old gitt>

Love to you
Bren
X
 
#8
I get this all the time. It hurts to be kind for some.
 

Nade

Full Member
#11
I do think that some people dont say anything becuase they dont like to admit to you that they think you have done well but I also think that some people dont like to mention it becuase they think it is "rude" to comment on someones weight.

They think that if they say you look good and you have lost weight, they are also saying you were a Heffer before, so dont say anything.

But I think this is limited to passing collegues or aquanancies (sp!) rahter than friends or relatives. I have one friend that would rather chew their own arm off than pay compliments and I am seeing them soon, so it will be interesting to see what they say becuase I know full well they would not be saying anything becuase of jealousy rather than politness!

And do you know what? I dont care! I know, they will know I have done well and looking good and that is good enough for me!
 

oxfordruse

This Time It's Personal!
S: 17st10lb C: 14st6lb G: 13st0lb BMI: 27.4 Loss: 3st4lb(18.55%)
#12
They wouldn't be jealous if they weren't also amazingly impressed, so it's all good.

I prefer brazen jealousy, to be honest, than the following type of backhanded compliment (which I've heard from a few people in the past):

"You've done so well but surely you've lost enough now? Why don't you stop?"

Grr. They sound well-meaning but they're dripping with envy of the fact that they're no longer going to get to be "the better-looking one".

It's these enablers you need to watch out for. To hell with the rest - you've lost 40lbs: you know they've noticed, and they know you know they've noticed. So work it a little!
 

Sunnysmile

Laserbeams set on goal
S: 16st8lb C: 16st8lb G: 10st0lb Loss: 0st0lb(0%)
#13
Oh the one that made me laugh was one of my colleagues who asked that and I told her how much Id lost and she followed it up with 'Wow thats great have you been trying to then, have you been on a diet' :rolleyes:
LMAO!! I think I would have had to have given a bit of a sarky response to that one!! ;) :D
 

flirty40greeneyes

Busy busy busy!!
S: 15st3lb C: 13st11lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 33.1 Loss: 1st6lb(9.39%)
#14
I had a "friend" who didn't notice when I lost 4stone and went from size 22 to size 12 .... but now I am putting weight on and a size 16 ... she says "I look better ... not so scrawny"!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah right!!! I'm still going to lose the regained weight .... and guess what?? another stone below what I was before!!!
 

KD

Gone fishing
#15
I didn't notice any jealousy. I have never known anyone be jealous of me thank goodness.

I did have some interesting comments, and also some people just didn't say anything, but put that down to other reasons.

My best friend didn't say anything until I got to goal. One day I said "BTW, I reached goal today" and she asked me "goal for what:confused:" :D When I told her, she congratulated me, then we moved on to other things. It's just not something we talk about.

Another occassion was when a few of us were talking and someone said they hadn't noticed the loss, but there again wasn't aware that I was overweight. I was just 'me'.

Interesting, as that's how I look at people. I tend to miss their size. More inclinded to describe them by their 'kind eyes' or smiley faces, and completely miss the fact that they weigh 30 stone.

My son is the same. On describing a school friend that I had to pick up, he went into great detail about the shape of his eyes, the faces he pulls...how nice he was and how there would be lots of other children around him. That his hair was soft and that he never frowns.

Completely missed telling me that the friend was black.:D
 

Ceri

Full Member
#16
I think that when you've got from size 20 to a size 14 that those who haven't commented are just plain jealous. The same thing happened to me last year. I hadn't lost as much weight as you - went from 16 - 12 (clothes size). There were those, usually those with a few weight issues themselves, who would just look up and down which I find ruder than commenting on weight.
You have done brilliantly, don't let people like that get you down. Next time they look you up and down innocently asked them - what's the matter - have I got something on my top?
Good luck with the rest of your journey,
Ceri
 

JustJo

Cambridge Counsellor
#17
My son is the same. On describing a school friend that I had to pick up, he went into great detail about the shape of his eyes, the faces he pulls...how nice he was and how there would be lots of other children around him. That his hair was soft and that he never frowns.

Completely missed telling me that the friend was black.:D

KD, that is one of the nicest things I have ever heard. What a wonderful description of a person - shame that we all don't see people like that, huh? "He never frowns." :)

I'm not sure that I ever experienced jealousy, either. I was finishing uni at the time, so didn't have colleagues, or a great social network (as a 'mature' student with kids and a mortgage, I didn't interact much with the other students!). The one friend I had at uni never really seemed to notice, but, like KD said, it was more because she'd never really noticed my weight in the first place. Same with my OH's mum. I guess, like KD (again :p ), I saw any 'non-comments' as people just not really paying attention, and that was fine by me!


Jo x


 


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