Hey Baby Cakes! Apologies in advance, as I've let this post get much longer than I meant to, but please bear with me. I’ve felt like you do… it’s that horrible, uncomfortable phase that you are very aware you’re overweight and that you know you should do something about it, but for some reason you can’t dredge up the motivation to put yourself through the weight loss journey. It’s especially difficult if you’ve dieted before, and you know how hard and emotionally draining it can be. Somewhere deep inside yourself, you’re telling yourself that you can’t face it, and for this reason you don’t. I’ve been in that place more times that I’d care to recall.
Words and thoughts are very powerful things. I’ve had to carefully filter the words “can’t” and “too hard” out of my vocabulary, and you find that once you tell yourself that you can do things and that a goal is within your reach even though it may be difficult that things do change. There’s nobody holding your back but your own thoughts about yourself.
Over the last couple of years I’ve had to get to know myself again, because I have a lot of emotional triggers for binging even when I’m not hungry (most prominently boredom), and I needed to learn to recognise them so I could redirect myself to something more productive (like walking or hula hooping) whenever they started. I had also worked a lot of nutritionally deficient foods into my diet over a long period of time. I knew that from past experience that calorie counting just caused me to nervously obsess about food packaging and also about my scales (I’d weigh myself every day or more, even though I knew weight would fluctuate daily). It stressed me out so much that I’d just break down and binge, and I’d ruin my progress.
So! I decided that I would not go on a diet. The whole psychology of dieting doesn’t suit me, because when I tell myself I can’t have something, I’ll want it and obsess about it. Instead, I’ve opted to change my relationship with food entirely as a lifestyle choice that will remain in place (hopefully) permanently. I’ve taken the nutritionally deficient food out of my diet and have made sure I’ve plenty of veg and fish in my diet. I cut out red meat, and only get lean meat that I know has come from a responsible source. I still look at food packaging, but I don’t look at calorie and fat content… I look at the ingredients. My one rule tends to be if the ingredients look more like a chemistry experiment than food, I won’t buy it. I’ve also been shocked at how many foods in the super market have sugar added to them for no particular reason! It’s no wonder so many people are overweight.
The thing is, I don’t even think about crisps and sweets unless they’re right in front of my face. I don’t buy them myself, so I don’t crave them when I’m at home. Sometimes when I go shopping, something bad will catch my eye (like tea cakes) and I’ll pick them up and be so close to putting it in the basket, but then I’ll chastise myself out loud by saying: “You don’t need it, put it back. This is your choice.” Sounds mad, but sure enough it works.
In the end, it’s all about reprogramming yourself to think differently. So far, it’s working great for me, and I haven’t binged in a long time. I’m losing weight, but I’m still a big girl… and that’s OK, because I’m now happy with myself no matter what happens. It’s really weird, but I could never say that before. I hope that you find your motivation and that maybe sometime I’ve said might be helpful.
