Struggling

Thanks for your advice everyone. I'm going to have a couple of weeks off i think, i have 2 weddings and a leaving do so can't even think about dieting, but i will not be back to my old ways, i will be eating heathily and cutting down, somehow driking all the water just feels like normal now so will still be doing that.

Cute and Quirky

I don't know what is going on with you, you are obviously some sort of angel to have stuck it for so long. You seem to have a problem offering advice i have read your other replies to other problems, maybe you you should go on some sort of people course because personally i find you really rude.

Not everyone is set out for SS and i don't think it is up to you to be the one to be so arrogant towards whoever has asked the question.

I have a Wedding, a Birthday Party and a Dinner to attend between 16th September and 3rd November and have it all sussed as to what I can eat and where. The Wedding is Buffet, the Birthday Party I have ordered Prawn Cocktail with no dressig, the Dinner is beef but I have phoned the hotel and arranged a piece of cod with no sauce and will just have the vegetables.

The difference for me is that I have to arrange my diet around my life, not arrange my social obligations first then allow the diet to fall second in line.

Losing weight is THE most important thing in the World to me - more important than anything else.

You have to WANT to lose weight in order to succeed. Your head needs to be in the right place.


 
This post may seem very harsh - I do think that you need it - you need to get your head in the right place to lose weight./quote]

Well to be honest, your post was IMO harsh and not what one might call motivational either.

I genuinely try not to judge people, albeit, it is not always possible to practice what I preach. I believe you have been very judgemental and while I note that somebody has said that you have some good points, they get lost with the directness of your manner.

I always try to understand that frankly we are none of us angels, we have all done something wrong (or we would not be on the site!!), sometimes over a long period of time, sometimes a lifetime. Often, making the transition from where they are now to where they want to be requires more than getting your head in the right place, however important that might be.

I think it would be more supportive to look at how we can motivate somebody and help them find the best route on their journey. Again, IMO, in effect telling people that they are wrong, you are right and they need to buck their ideas up, rarely produces positive results.

Regards

Brad
 
Well said Brad, I am one of those very lucky people that followed CD for 6 months, 4 and a half on SS then the stages. I didnt cheat, and worked my foods around AAM weeks etc. Yet, I am NO angel, and just because I managed to do it doesnt make me some kind of higher being than anyone else on here, I struggle to keep it off and jump back on 790 occasionally if I go up more than a few lbs.

Just because CD agrees with me, I find it gives me energy and I dont lose my hair, I feel fitter than ever whilst I am on it, Doesnt meant that everyone feels the same way, my MIL was doing the diet early last year, and she struggled tremendously with SS, she was tired and lethargic and genuinely unhappy yet she stuck to the diet till the bitter end, would I have done the same if I felt like that, probably not. This goes to show that we dont all feel on top of the world doing CD, many do, some don't.

If people want tough love then they will ask for it, as we go down the CD road of life we meet all different types of people, some can handle it, and some cant, but everyone of us is worthy of losing the weight, we all in some way want/wanted to lose it, like Brad says thats why we are here.

I seen people who think, well i did it, so that means you can do it too, erm, NOT!!!!!!!!!!! Life isnt like that, otherwise we would always be the same, just because my husband can balance on one leg and jump up and down, doesnt mean I can do it too, even though I practise like mad, i just dont get it!!!

Gillybean, if you need advise about 1000, 790 or healthy eating plans then shout, we have a wealth of knowledge on here x
 
Hi Brad

I think it was me that said she raised some good points. I still think that. However I do not condone the manner and was trying to keep the peace by doing the positive followed by the "however............"

I'm just a newbie and didn't want to step on anyones toes :eek: I hope I haven't upset anyone

Ails xxx
 
Thanks, Guys!! It's always awkward being the new girl - don't you think??!!:D

Ails xx
 
Gilly

I dont think theres any shame in admitting you're struggling or indeed that CD isnt for you. I couldnt do it for the very reasons youre talking about, I know I couldnt take food totally out the equation.

The important thing is you still want to lose the weight :) If CD isnt the plan for you its just a case of finding the one which is.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do

*HUGS*
 

CnQ, Not everyone is as strong in the CD world as people like us, its not possible, I thought your earlier thread (see link above) was very well put, and many others did too.

However, it doesnt mean that people can just read it and then do it, life isnt like that.

Again it goes back to reading in to a person and seeing the type of advice they need.

We can all come across very differently in the written word than "real life" and maybe its a case of reading what we write and making small changes to motivate rather than dictate.

You are doing fantastically, and I can read inbetween the lines and see that you want everyone to do the same, it agrees with you, like it does me, yet some people struggle and need sympathy as well as a firm hand x
 
  • Like
Reactions: DQ
First off, I need to say I'm not a fan of tough love. All it ever did for me was lead to the biscuit tin :rolleyes: but each to their own!

The important thing is you still want to lose the weight :) If CD isnt the plan for you its just a case of finding the one which is.

This is it exactly - you need to find the plan that works for you, then work it!! :cool: Every diet works (well, most of the sane ones :p ) but if it doesn't suit you, then it won't work for you.

As a CDC I do everything in my power to help people to do CD the way it is meant to be done. But in the end, no matter the literature, the successes they see around them, the support they receive, for some people a VLCD is not for them.

And I make sure to tell them straight : trying and stopping SS doesn't make them a failure. It just means the diet isn't the one for them or they're not in the right place.

That is the beauty of a place like Minimins - there are so many other plans you can try, advice and support you can get - VLCDs, calorie counting, SW, WW, Unit Plan, Intuitive Eating - and they all have their place here. You never fail until you give up trying.

So don't you feel you have to apologise honey - we're here to support you in YOUR choices, not make them for you. :hug99:
 
Darn right DQ, Fabby x
 
Sorry, just wanted to add my two penneth worth,
I think cute n quirky had some valid points, I think one was that there will always be reasons/excuses social events, for not sticking to it.
There are ways round it by planning ahead. And you have to weigh up what is most important to you at that time.

I ss ed very successfully but this week after aamw I have struggled and not ss 100% any day. But managed to stay the same weight.

I will be in a better mindset this week and will stick to it.

But you have to find domething that works for you be it cd ww or sw
All diets work if you stick to them.
I hope you find something that suits you at this time.
No offence intended lol x x
 
Hi Brad

I think it was me that said she raised some good points. I still think that. However I do not condone the manner and was trying to keep the peace by doing the positive followed by the "however............"

I'm just a newbie and didn't want to step on anyones toes :eek: I hope I haven't upset anyone

Ails xxx

Toots

I don't disagree a good point was made, but like you indicated t was the manner it was provided. You have certainly not upset me at all and I am sorry if I might have given you cause to think you might have. :eek:
 
I think you are missing the point that Cambridge IS food - total balanced nutrition - just in a different form.

You had food on your husband's birthday when you just HAD to eat, even though everyone told you it would set you off eating.

If you want to lose weight you need to want it more than eating a Chinese, a packet of crisps, or anything else.

It sounds to me as if you want a quick fix, for someone to wave a magic wand and for all the weight to just disappear. It doesn't work like that, you need to put some effort into it.

If you stick to SS properly you will get energy. You won't, however, get energy by constantly finding excuses to HAVE to eat, which is what you are doing now.

This post may seem very harsh - I do think that you need it - you need to get your head in the right place to lose weight.

Hi :)

Sometimes it takes a few attempts at personal reflection, evaluation and planning for positive change before you hit "the right time" and get your head in the right place.

Just my personal opinion of course but I see people sat in front of me everyday who feel exactly the same about drugs&alcohol as we do about food. It's not easy, it's a journey and doesn't always give you a lightbulb moment first time. If it did...I would be slim!:D

Lacey :)
 
Hi Brad

I think it was me that said she raised some good points. I still think that. However I do not condone the manner and was trying to keep the peace by doing the positive followed by the "however............"

I'm just a newbie and didn't want to step on anyones toes :eek: I hope I haven't upset anyone

Ails xxx

Not at all hun :)
 
Back
Top