Times are a changing!

sezbo

Member
So it's the night before I attempt to change my life for the better (very dramatic I know!) but it's true! So many reasons to sort myself out, too many to go into right now but I'm sure I will as the journey goes on. Let me be stronger than I've ever been before and let me do this for good!

will weigh in tomorrow, not looking forward to that part but hey ho onwards and downwards on the scales (hopefully!) chat more in the morning!
 
Thank you Mini!

so I weighed in there this morning..10 stone 7, not good when you're only 5 ft 2 but I know it could be worse. Just feel quite angry with myself for getting so much bigger than my frame can take..I look as wide as I do tall!
The big thing I'm trying to do here though is feel healthy again. Losing weight is kind of a bi-product, the main thing is I'm sick of feeling tired all the time, picking up every bug going and being so lethargic and generally miserable. I've also been on anti-depressants since having my second little one- a result of post-natal depression, but I really get the feeling that if I ate the right things and had a clean way of living my mood would stabilise without the pills. That's just a thought anyway as I always seem to feel brighter when I'm taking care of myself and eating fuel for my body rather than crap!
Im addicted to that buzz that rubbish food gives you when you feel down, I guess I use it to self medicate..gosh I sound a bit mental writing this down. I'm not honest, I'm just trying to make sense of things in my own head!

so anyway enough psychoanalysis! Moving swiftly on, I just wrote an email there to a personal trainer asking for his help to train me (moment of madness, I'm about as fit as a sack of spuds) and he replied saying he'd give me a ring later..cue me puking up with fear in the corner. How embarrassing! Why did I do that? I feel I may be mortifying myself in front of complete strangers shortly!

Will write again tonight with my days food. I made some Paleo granola there earlier and it's SO scrummy with almond milk. Just have to have a small amount as it's full of nuts though and I know when you have weight to lose you shouldn't over do the nut consumption!
 
So today I've eaten as follows:

Cup of green tea

home made granola (2oz bowl) with almond milk
fruit smoothie
water

Paleo muffin and camomile tea

cabbage, onions, peppers, sliced steak
water

omelette made with spinach, cherry tomatoes, onions and chicken
Water

banana
water

peppermint tea


Feeling pleased with myself and not hungry but craving chocolate, biscuits etc. This is my usual treat time, as a reward for the end of the day I have a sugar binge..more out of habit than anything else!

Scary gym guy phoned. He was nice and got me to agree to a 60 day challenge with him...so I either reach the targets he sets me or I get 200% of my money back at the end. I don't have anything left to lose so might as well go for it. 60 days, that's nothing...right?!?
 
Day 2

Ive been ok today except don't think I've probably eaten enough so had a few dips of energy..mainly because I had breakfast late and then missed a proper lunch. on the plus side I made a gorgeous home made soup for tea and there's plenty left for lunches in the week.

home made granola with almond milk
fruit smoothie

home made banana muffin (paleo)

home made soup (carrots, onions, spinach, leeks, reduced fat coconut milk, home made chicken stock, few slices of honey roasted ham and salt to taste)

Loads of water and green tea
 
Not done too well so far today. I won't disclose all but suffice to say I haven't stuck to the Paleo guidelines..it involved going out for breakfast and having buttermilk pancakes! Argh! Disaster! Never mind, I'm treating this week as a bit of a learning curve, easing myself into things. Next week the exercise programme starts too and there's no way I'll put myself through that for no reason by spoiling my efforts and not sticking to the healthy eating!
 
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