Want to burst into tears

[emmaedes]

Hi All

I'm no stranger to this site at all posted many times in many different diet sections.

Recently I just don't know what's wrong with me, I for one can't stop eating and it's all completely emotional eating. Like I could easily eat a family bag of crisps and a family size chocolate bar and then want to start on another bag of crisps.

It was my birthday on Tuesday and I literally are until I was in pain I was THAT full!! I just felt like crying on my birthday I'm 23 and I feel like 53 go early felt the lowest I have ever felt. Worst birthday ever. I was meant to be going out for a girls night Tomo for my bday but I've cancelled it! Because there's no way I can go out feeling like this.

I just feel so lost, I basically eat and say its crisps I won't stop because I always think that next crisp will taste nicer .... Then the whole bag is gone and I'm no more satisfied than I was before I ate anything!!!!

I just don't know what to do!!! I have a holiday in October and a wedding to go to in August and I think if I went anywhere near this size I would like literally break down. I'm currently a size 14 and I want to be a 10 by holiday minimum.

I just have no idea what to do. It's effecting my relationship now big time. We argue my bf actually thinks I don't find him attractive anymore or love him but its actually the opposite I have my mind set that he can't possibly fancy me or anything so I'm shutting him off.

I can't do this anymore ......

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[1goldingoap]

poor you .i hope you feel better soon .have you thought of a hobbie .that uses your hands like crosstich or knitting .so that you cant eat .as you are usung your hands so cant pick up crisp .it is alfull when you feel so down .i have a dsi game concel .to take my mind off food .and on the games i play .hope i have been helpfull .lorna x

 

[JackieN]

:bighug: I used to be exactly the same. alot of these foods are just addictive the more we have the more we want I turned to food for everything. if happy, if sad, if stressed etc. :bighug:

You can do this You have your goal of your holiday, just break it down in to managable chunks. set yourself some little mini goals perhaps to get you started? x

 

[emmaedes]

poor you .i hope you feel better soon .have you thought of a hobbie .that uses your hands like crosstich or knitting .so that you cant eat .as you are usung your hands so cant pick up crisp .it is alfull when you feel so down .i have a dsi game concel .to take my mind off food .and on the games i play .hope i have been helpfull .lorna x

Thank you. That's a good idea. Think ill give that one a try!! Thank u! Xx

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[emmaedes]

:bighug: I used to be exactly the same. alot of these foods are just addictive the more we have the more we want I turned to food for everything. if happy, if sad, if stressed etc. :bighug:

You can do this You have your goal of your holiday, just break it down in to managable chunks. set yourself some little mini goals perhaps to get you started? x

Thank you! Yes that's very true!! I eat if I'm happy , sad, angry, stressed .... Basically any emotion I link to eating

Yer I think I will make small goals rather than looking at the whole picture making it seem more daunting!!! I just don't know what to do?! What plan to follow?! I seem to set myself up to fail all the time so confused xx

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[JackieN]

You have to do whats right for you But take it in smaller chunks. Set yourself up to succeed. This is how I've done it this time. Baby steps. Perhaps have an exercise goal> even ie I will go for a walk 3 times a week you could have a goal of learning to listen for your full signal and stop eating when you hear it. If you get it wrong and you get hungry you have something then. I did this last summer and its been brilliant as once you really hear that full signal it starts to become a habit to stop when full. Why not just consider it a lifestyle change rather than a diet? Making little changes one at a time? x

 

[emmaedes]

You have to do whats right for you But take it in smaller chunks. Set yourself up to succeed. This is how I've done it this time. Baby steps. Perhaps have an exercise goal> even ie I will go for a walk 3 times a week you could have a goal of learning to listen for your full signal and stop eating when you hear it. If you get it wrong and you get hungry you have something then. I did this last summer and its been brilliant as once you really hear that full signal it starts to become a habit to stop when full. Why not just consider it a lifestyle change rather than a diet? Making little changes one at a time? x

Yer that's a gd idea. I read Paul Mckennas book a little while ago and that was all about eating only when ur hungry so deciding what is physical hunger and what's emotional hunger!! I think I need to re-read this!!! And your right to see it as a lifestyle change not a diet!!!

Xxx

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[JackieN]

I think for many emotional eaters the word 'diet' just makes them crave more .... Lifestyle changes - that way you can do things one step at a time I used to be afraid to stop eating when full. I think I used to get comfort from feeling too full if that makes sense? Now I hate it. It took a good two months to master the full signal but I remember reminding myself 'hunger is not an emergency' If I got hungry later I could have something else. Putting food in the bin was a whole new experience for me. My MUm used to say 'there are starving children in africa who would do anything for that food eat it'. she was right but the fact was if I left it they were not going to get it....

Sit and just eat. No tv. No book. No pc. Concentrate on eating only. Thats how I did it. Some meals I inhaled the food others I mastered it. Takes time but its a brilliant habit to get used to

Waffle over but set yourself up to succeed. Make little changes rather than drastic ones x

 

[porkscratching]

Thank you! Yes that's very true!! I eat if I'm happy , sad, angry, stressed .... Basically any emotion I link to eating

Yer I think I will make small goals rather than looking at the whole picture making it seem more daunting!!! I just don't know what to do?! What plan to follow?! I seem to set myself up to fail all the time so confused xx

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Hey hun - you sound exactly like I did a year ago. You're getting to the tipping point where staying doing what you are doing is causing you so much pain then you will do anything to change. That's good as it means once you do start, you're like one of those snowballs rolling down a mountain in reverse - instead of getting bigger and bigger, you'll get smaller and smaller!
Which plan to choose? For me it had to be one that lets you eat.
Paul McKenna is great but make sure you realise it's only a tool you can use - not a mind bending event that changes your life forever! (I still struggle with eating mindfully). But most of all - decide what supports you, your life goals and emotional goals rather than "going on another diet" - I can honestly say I walk past the crisps, chocolate, snacks aisles now and have no desire for the stuff most of the time (Sometimes I do treat myself but I do it with total connection and awareness that I am choosing to do it).
All the plans will work, once you have enough leverage on yourself to change. And if I can, anyone can - the best I ever hoped for was a size 16, bought size 10 trousers again today. Plan it. Live it.
Number one - stop buying junk, if it isn't in the house you can't eat it.

 

[emmaedes]

Hey hun - you sound exactly like I did a year ago. You're getting to the tipping point where staying doing what you are doing is causing you so much pain then you will do anything to change. That's good as it means once you do start, you're like one of those snowballs rolling down a mountain in reverse - instead of getting bigger and bigger, you'll get smaller and smaller!
Which plan to choose? For me it had to be one that lets you eat.
Paul McKenna is great but make sure you realise it's only a tool you can use - not a mind bending event that changes your life forever! (I still struggle with eating mindfully). But most of all - decide what supports you, your life goals and emotional goals rather than "going on another diet" - I can honestly say I walk past the crisps, chocolate, snacks aisles now and have no desire for the stuff most of the time (Sometimes I do treat myself but I do it with total connection and awareness that I am choosing to do it).
All the plans will work, once you have enough leverage on yourself to change. And if I can, anyone can - the best I ever hoped for was a size 16, bought size 10 trousers again today. Plan it. Live it.
Number one - stop buying junk, if it isn't in the house you can't eat it.

Thank you for ur post!!

I completely understand what u say about a plan that u can eat on! And completely get that Paul McKenna is just a tool to use. I found his book so helpful but I didn't keep refreshing myself so old habits came bk!! I think I may just opt for his plan of no food is off limits as long as ur actually physically hungry. I know I'm doing wrong because I go and buy crisps and as I'm doing it I feel so guilty and I feel like everyone is looking at me thinking oo she doesn't need anymore crisps. Strange isn't it! Cos I think that and I feel bad so what do I do to make myself feel better?! Eat!! Viscous cycle!!

Wow I bet your over the moon! Sounds like you've worked really hard to be in the frame of mind ur in now?!

I think I need to read my Paul McKenna book again Tomo and over the bank Hol. Get into that frame of mind again xx

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[1goldingoap]

if you ever feel down .let me know .as we have all felt like you .at times .xlorna