What Sealed Your Resolve / Motivation?

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by turquoise, 19 January 2010 Social URL.

  1. turquoise

    turquoise Member

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    Hello everyone,

    I am a returner who tried the diet once before but stopped because I couldn't afford it. Over a year I gained the back 3 Stones I had lost. If finances are tight again, something else will have to go. Weight loss is my main priority till I am at target.

    I wondered what crystallised your determination to embark on Cambridge / lose weight?

    For me, it was the following:

    • I had become so fat that my usually concerned parents had stopped commenting and would just give me up and down looks when they thought I couldn't see.
    • I want to be able to wear whatever I like.
    • Being unable to fasten my coat in the bitter cold and snow
    • I want to feel comfortable with others looking at me.
    • Realising I was wearing the same 3 tops on rotation beacause nothing else would fit
    • I want to feel physically strong, fit and agile.
    • Realising I had stopped caring about my appearance past a certain weight
    • My father is diabetic and Iwant to be healthy.
    • My mother is arthritic and I want to be free from pain.
    • Hearing some slim teenage girls whispering "Did you see her? That woman's so fat!" And they were just remarking out of shock, not even laughing
    • I want to be taken seriously for the intelligent, capable woman I am.
    • Having a tram full of people fall silent then start sniggering when a little boy kept calling to his mother that "Big Momma" was standing near him. She didn't even try to stop him and laughed out loud herself.
    • I want to live life instead of hiding away because of my weight
    • A good friend at work commenting that I was always eating. Not true but how could I argue?
    • My rude Manager trying to give me a lecture about how I should eat and cook healthily in front of the whole office .
    • My Ex boyfriend drunkenly telling me I am not attractive and then denying that there was anything wrong with that. Every time it came up he would try to justify himself.
    • I want real male companionship in life, not to be alone with the TV in my old age.
    • My Manager refusing to let me turn down a chocolate he was offering. He brought in a tin for everyone to help themselves but stood over me with it in his hand till I took one ( and threw it away later)
    • Being in my thirties and feeling that my prime drifted away some ago, smothered under all this fat.
    • Teenagers pretending that I stink because I am fat
    • And the worst - feeling horrified when another similarly sized person stands next to me out of fear it will attract even more attention to me. Has anyone else ever felt like that? It fills me with disgust at myself.
    • To lick this preoccupation with food and wanting to be slim and just do it and focus on other parts of life. It is like I use my weight as an excuse to busy me so I dont have to deal with anything else.
    I started Cambridge on 16/01/10. Had prepared myself by cutting down carbs for 4 days previously.

    Am over the unsure first days now and feeling more alive already.

    Though I dont feel smaller sized yet, my insides feel slimmer. Maybe because I feel more energetic and all this water has cleansed me a bit.

    Would be interested to hear your thoughts.
     
    Last edited: 19 January 2010
    Blingbabe, lancslass53 and mrsessex like this.
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  3. Trim T

    Trim T Full Member

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    Turquoise, i got quite emotional reading your reasons for dieting, i hope writing it down helps to keep you motivated along the way.

    For me; i just hated looking at myself, i hated feeling fat, got sick of people telling me i wasn't fat (especially my husband!)..... but if i'm honest i didn't really see the true image of myself, i was actually a lot bigger than i realised at the time.

    It was only once i lost the weight, i looked back at old photos and could have cried. There were times i had gone out feeling great, thinking i looked really nice, i couldn't see the bulging belly and several chins until then.

    But it's all worth it in the end, i still feel strange shopping and i feel like the girls on the changing rooms look at me like "she soooo can't fit into that!", but i suppose confidence with our new bodies takes time to achieve.

    Good luck with CD, i hope you succeed and can tick off those items on your list quickly.

    T x
     
  4. turquoise

    turquoise Member

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    Thanks TrimT,

    Your kind words have made me feel so much better.

    Am so thankful for this forum. Everyone is so open and supportive.

    Its so true that somehow we really lose touch with what you really look like when we gain a lot of weight. Cant wait to start logging the losses on my ticker.

    X
     
  5. enlightenme2

    enlightenme2 Gold Member

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    Turquoise I soo feel your pain. It is actually horrible how people can be so mean and how we just take it coz after all they're right aren't they? Reading your post just brought so many 'bad' memories. But as long as we take the steps necessary to rectify it and WE don't begin to make fun or comment on other 'big' people, then the fight is almost won. Good luck with CD I'm sure you'll succeed.
     
  6. cj1

    cj1 Full Member

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    Ive had a bit of a shaky start to my diet and reading your post has really motivated me to do well. Your reasons for wanting to lose weight are so honest and upfront and its made me think about why I want to do it.
    I keep telling myself thats its not much to ask, its only 3 months out of my life to look the way I want.
    We'll get through it together. This site is a godsend and the people on it are wonderful.
    Good luck to you.
     
  7. turquoise

    turquoise Member

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    Good Luck CJ1, we WILL do it.

    Ennlightenme2, I have been thinking a lot about people's treatment and opinions of overweight people. I know it's got to be about, and for, me but there is a strong push factor in the decision. Have just got to keep it at the forefront who this is really all for otherwise it would be easy to feel hard done by.
     
    Last edited: 19 January 2010
  8. cicerone

    cicerone Cambridge Diet Counsellor

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    Turquoise, reading your message made me cry., so many emotions you have felt, I, and I'm sure lots of others have felt too. Be strong hunni, your worth more then you think. People who are cruel to others are mainly hiding behind there own insecurities. You just leave them to it.

    You will have many friends on here all supporting you, and watching your progress, and people to share your journey with. Honestly, this site spurred me on so many times, and the amount of people here who actually care is amazing.

    Keep posting, keep on track, and I really cant wait to read how you get on. I have a feeling that Ms Turquoise is going to bloom and show everyone what an inspiration she can be. x
     
  9. Nellyphant

    Nellyphant Silver Member

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    We're all here to support each other. I too have reasons like you.

    WE CAN DO IT!
     
  10. Blingbabe

    Blingbabe Back On Track!

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    Hello Turquoise

    Well done on such an honest post. I am sure that we all relate to many of the points that you have raised - my mum would do the 'look' when she thought I wouldn't notice, or maybe it was being done to be obvious?!
    I am 41 so you definitely are in your prime, with many good years ahead of you for having great fun and enjoying every aspect of your life. Infact, I think I am meeting a much more genuine type of guy since turning 40 - maybe its because maturity has brought me better judgement and less rigid ideas as to what constitutes a nice man.

    It seems as if you came across some very unkind people, I can see that I have been more fortunate at work (it helps if you work with people that are also doing VLCDs, Weight Watchers etc)

    Wishing you well, I so believe that you will achieve goal as you are so clear about why you have embarked on CD x
     
  11. turquoise

    turquoise Member

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    Hi Blingbabe and Cicerone, Congratulations on your amazing losses so far.
     
  12. Amina

    Amina Full Member

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  13. LV30

    LV30 Gold Member

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    Turquoise
    What an honest and extremely moving post. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us.
    I think we can all identify with the points you raised.
    It never ceases to amaze me how cruel people can be - intentionally or unintentionally.
    We all deserve to be happy - just be strong and with the help of CD and this forum (which is fantastic!), you'll get to your goal in no time.
    All the best sweetie and good luck.
    Lynne
    x
     
  14. turquoise

    turquoise Member

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    It's really heartening to know that a lot of us have felt the same way. and in the same sense through minimins, know that we are not alone.

    Wishing wonderful Wednesday to all

    X
     
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