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What you REALLY need to know about Men

#1
The Guys' Rules

I am sure I have sen this somewhere before or something like it anyway.

However, it is worth you ladies taking note.

I could have written this myself.

Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.


And there you have it. I suggest you print this put and pin it to your noticeboard, chant it everyday, and give your husband/boyfriend a clear run to the bathroom in the morning. It is called our thinking time.
 
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#4
all soooo true !

made me giggle - thanx Brad !

love

Debz
xx
 
#5
:D totally agree and vigarous exercise makes headaches go away so it is not an excuse:D
 

georgiasmum

Regular Member
S: 19st0lb C: 18st5lb G: 11st0lb BMI: 41.5 Loss: 0st9lb(3.38%)
#6
Brad, am always appreciative of your insights. You are secretly a woman - no man has ever expressed himself so clearly!!!!!
 
#7
Thank you Brad - it's all so much clearer now :p
 


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