Why this time HAS to be it.

BlackRose

Gold Member
I'm going to be 29 on the 24th. I do not want most of my 20s to have been wasted on me thinking about how fat and hideous I am.

I am emotionally stronger and more confident with other people than I've ever been in my life. I am more confident in my capabilites and for once I actually believe I am going somewhere.

I am beginning my Masters in September. As some of you may know I graduated last year -and my final year was a complete and utter nightmare. A whirlwind of panic and anxiety attacks, missed classes due to claustrophobia and an overwhelming need to hide myself away. Yes this was stress induced but I am absolutely certain -I know without any doubt, that my weight, my unhealthy lifestyle played a HUGE part in how I coped(or did not cope lol) during my degree. Ya see while I'm growing in confidence in my ability to succeed academically, and despite that I now actually like who I am. All that esteem is going to waste because I hate my body -I am so embarrassed and ashamed and HATE to be seen. I feel that when people look at me they see all my flaws, all my weaknesses because every excess inch of fat on my body gives it all away. There's nowhere to hide the uglies of myself when I'm fat.

So now that I've been accepted for the MA (WOOP WOOP!!) I feel I've been given a 2nd chance. A chance to actually have the energy and strength to give it everything. To really throw myself at my studies and bury myself in my books without all the cr4p that being fat has brought me and ruined my time at uni before. A chance to focus on something other than me and how I look because I am just so sick of it! I'm sick of being utterly consumed with my weight when's there's so much more to me, and there's so much good and good fortune in my life and so much more fun to be had!!

Anyways. Think I needed to put that down to make it real to myself, so apologies if you've nodded off at your computer.

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE!!!!
 
I know what you mean ony for a I have a few more years on you. You seem to be in the right place mentally so thats half the battle, you will do it!!

Good luck.
 
Me too Black rose only Im a year ahead...Im going to be 30 on nov 8th...and Ive been above 20 stone since I was 19... Missed my 20s ... so Im not missing my 30s
 
I think once you are focused it makes it easier.

I spent most of my 20s and most of my 30's being overweight. For me the trigger point is always my niece's birthday in June - she'll be 7 and for the last 6 years I've said I wasn't going to be the same size 18/20. It always depressed me as it always ends up a sunny day and I'd be there fat and in my fat clothes. This year it is going to be different. I'm not bothered if anyone notices or not - but inside I know I will feel better.

I don't think I realised how heavy I had got - I was indenial.

Losing the weight, has given me more confidence and makes me more positive.

Good luck.
 
Right Folks!! Enough! We are intelligent, interesting and supportive people. We need to take the focus of our weights today. Ye olde Lipotrimme is taking care of that so we can focus on other things.

I'm off to start a thread on something. I just don't know what!! lol But it wont be weight related!
 
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