I've just started getting this 'you need to stop' talk now..
I loved it when people came up to me and commented on how well i had done/am doing, but the last few weeks people have been asking if i'm feeling ok, saying i looked pale etc. this ontop of a recent health scare, it had really started playing with my mind, started to really effect me mentally and i started to close in on myself, i didn't want to talk to people, i just wanted to stay at home in bed and just wait for the bad news (i was expecting) from the doctors..
i'm slightly ashamed to say i did revert back to some old eating habits, extra sized portions, probably due to eating for comfort and to feel good about myself and i did put on about 6 Lbs
.
Evertime i went into work people were still asking if i was ok, look pale, you look ill .. blah blah blah! i managed to go to the doctors for results and everything was normal, i was fine. a huge weight was released of my sholders and i went into work the next monday morning feeling fantastic, but still the coments came, pale, ill, not yourself..
i would sit there at work trying to figure it out, the doctor said i was fine, ''your looking really healthy'' he said. but at work i didn't, it was driving me crazy, till one day in a meeting we were told that the cleaning of the roof was going to take longer then expected due to bad weather. i realised that my pale-ness was down to the windows in the roof had been covered up for the workmen to clean on the roof.. the only light in the factory for 4 weeks had been, L.E.D ceiling lights, making me look pale. because i have lost weight in my face i no longer have a bit of a red glow due to sweating and overheating..
i'm normal, perfectly normal.. and only look pale because my skin is a healthy skin tone, and under powerful lights i look pale. while everyone else in head to toe 'tan-tastic' and bronzed up.
i think people need to realise that words can hurt, it's not a case of
sticks and stones.. people are saying things, thinking in your best interest (sometimes just to by nasty in a subtle way, and i work with a woman who is like that)
for the last week i have stopped listening to what people say, i'll nod and say i'm fine, never been better etc.. but the only thing i am listening to now is the number on the scales and my clothes size going down. after feeling great the last few weeks i have got back on my plan, worked my ass off at the gym, and have lost the worry weight and then some
This is the best i have felt in forever and nothing anyone says from now on can get me down. i just hope anyone else here can do the same.