Advice for children

[Size10Dreamer]

OK, here comes a long post and is aimed at the Mums and Dads on the thread.

How do you limit the effect that your eating plans have on your children????

When I had the counselling with LL, I determined that my weight problems started around the age of 7, and I could directly attribute this to me being the youngest of 5 children and my Mum going back to full time work and me being a latchkey kid!!!!!! None of my siblings have a weight problem as such, but 3 of them are obsessed with size and I believe this derives from my Dad who had psychological issues when we were growing up. (he now has a form of anorexia but it's connected with the latter stages of alzheimers that he's in).

Anyway my point is, I have 2 children. A 4 year old boy who has my husbands shape, metabolism and approach to food. ie. he stops when he's full. My daughter is 8 and has my shape and doesn't have a 'full' button. At the moment she's perfect size, but I do limit the amount she has (because she would eat and eat and eat given the opportunity). I'm really desperate not to pass on what has historically been my bad eating habits and am worried again now that if she sees me having a shake/soup/bar and realises that this isn't 'normal' habit!

I make sure the children eat well, and they have a weekly treat in going out for their tea and they're allowed the odd small trip to the sweet shop. My daughter isn't overweight, but I'd say she's probably at the top of the range and I really wouldn't want it to go any further.

Any advice on how others deal with this?

 

[rose1987]

Hi ive got 3 children all are a healthy weight my eldest who is 6 already belives being fat is unhealthy because the schools are making children aware of there eating habbits , she sees a slim person as healthy and a fat person as unhealthy.
IM always dieting when my daughter asks why am eating something different to her i just reply" im trying to get healthy so that i can play with you more etc.. and she understands that .
You will not be the only influence to your children schools, tv etc.. Just explain to your daughter and help her understand what you are doing it for .
I hope this helps you i know how difficult it is when you have kids x

 

[Isis1981]

I am in a similar boat to you . I have a son who is nearly 2, who seems so far to take after his very slim dad. I have a son who is nearly 8 from a previous relationship. Both sides of his family have people with weight issues (including me and his dad)

I worry with my elder son, because he really does not have an off switch. So, like you I have to try to limit him. He is a bit chunky. But as yet, not gone too far and I plan on him only getting taller now lol

I have let my son know that how I am eating is only because I have let myself become too overweight. I tell him it will not be forever. He just accepts it as what I do now. I use myself as an example for why I limit him sometimes. He understands this

Sorry I cannot be a lot of help

 

[Dietkitty]

I'm sure at 8 your daughter is already aware of peoples size as they grow up so quickly these days. I agree with what the others have said and as she has a good diet you can explain that when you were growing up we didn't have the knowledge that we do now so you need to do this just for a little while to become healthy like she is and that you are then going to stay that way.
My eldest had an issue when he was about 11 and stopped eating his lunch. When I asked him why he said it was because he was fat. In reality he was skin and bones! I pulled up my top, grabbed a handful of flab and said 'no, this is fat, where's yours?' Fortunately as I was onto it before it went any further it worked!

 

[babystar31]

i always make sure my 2 year old son eats well. luckily his favourite foods ar all fairly healthy anyway lol. silly but i always used to make his dinner but not have mine til much later on by which time takeaway seemed like a good idea lol.

he gets treats but not everyday. hes not really one for chocolate anyway, and loves his fruit and veg.

hes actually really tall and skinny (takes after his dad) so hopefully it stays this way lol x

 

[short and dumpy]

I think honesty is probably the best way. As the others before have said wisely.
Children seem to be rather more perceptive than we credit them for. Rather than them picking up only on our eating habits, I think they hone in on our personal feelings, and our view on food rather than food itself.
In the majority I would suspect all of us at some time have tried a diet where we dislike the food, or dislike ourselves for putting a fork of takeaway in our mouths...
The little facial changes as we see ourselves in photos, or in a swimming costume when we take them swimming.

I think it is more probable they pick up on our emotions and own self esteem issue.

Like the others say, I think I will explain to my little one that mummy is not healthy as she didn't know how to be healthy. I enjoy shopping with her, making lists together and choosing all the bright fruit and vegetables for her, she loves it. I try to always involve her in the making of her dinner, blunt knife of course hehe chopping mushrooms, preparing pasta etc. That way she is 'helping' mummy learn what food is good.

Maybe explaining it is short term, which it is.. in the future your eating habits will become healthy.. telling them it is not just a drink or soup. but has all the healthy things fruit and vegetables contain, rather than letting them view it as just a 'drink'.

I try to have a bar at lunch time, so although different food, it is the sitting and eating together where she can see me enjoying food. Soup at dinner for the same reasoning. Rather than hide away glugging a shake out of sight.

They are exposed a lot more now to healthy ideals in school, pre school even the telly programmes. We are just living examples of the after affect of ignoring that advice... it could be a good life lesson for them.

It is a hard one isn't it... I am a little lost on what to do for the best, but we can only do what we think is the right thing... I am trying to make food fun, but without empathsisng calorie counting or weighing things, I want her to be active.. we even dance around the room hehe, I want her to eat healthy without thinking about it.. hard when the Tall One says things like carrots yuck! when she is eating one grrrr.
I was thinking of buying her a plate with pictures of portion sizes on it, to make it more of a game 'puzzle' at dinner time to see if mummy got it right hehe

Whatever way you choose, try not to give yourself a hard time, at the end of the day you are doing this for them, You will be happier more energetic, and able to be a role model.

They sadly will always be bombarded by pressure about body image, not only from us but every where they turn as they grow... You will be able to assure them and be proof that you can be beautiful, and a good person no matter their size.

 

[Size10Dreamer]

Thanks everyone.

You're right dietkitty, at the age of 8 it's scary how much awareness they have. My daughter already is very 'into' what she wears and knows that too much chocolate or sweets or junk food is bad. I guess it's just that her and her brother are SOOOOO different with their metabolisms.