An interesting turnaround of events!!

[curvesncurls]

Yeah it's a funny one, the mother-daughter thing - the way they can say TONS with just a short pause before the comments. People don't like change, even when they really love us. Guess it's just a reaction to that. She wants you to be happy, but is afraid that she won't recognise you or that you're highlighting what she's not doing herself.
(Can you tell I'm struggling with this with my mum too???!!!! She's stuffing herself and getting more depressed about her weight, but doing nothing about and giving digs to my bro about his weight!)
I've another slant on this going on at the moment. I've 2 anorexic/bulimic friends, obsessed with exercise and starving/bingeing and purging. To quote one of them, "I'd be suicidal if I was over a size 6". (I'll not even be a size 6 in shoes - 7 1/2...) They keep pushing it like it's a health fest, but it's an illness. Can't understand me getting any male attention, comments like I need to just make up my mind to lose weight if that's what I want and then, oh I should just forget it cos I'm lovely the way I am, or I'm just jealous.
I didn't mean this to turn into War and Peace, but I think that people like to have you in your box, they know what way things are and where they stand with you, but then are uncomfortable if that changes. It's just having the strength to keep going even when they're not happy...

 

[funcurls]

Well said curvesncurls!! I wholeheartedly agree with you there!! I think peoples' attitudes say a lot more about themselves than they do about the person they're directing the comment at!! Infact I was walking down the road just 2 hours ago and a lady from my village I haven't seen in months stopped her car, wound down the window and said "I didn't recognise you, where's my lovely cuddly girl gone?!" She actually sounded as if she thought it was a shame I'd lost 4 stone (and might I add I'm still 10.5 lb above the top of my BMI- she's about a size 8!)! I would be a very very rich psychiatrist if I was able to read peoples' minds and know what drives them to come out with things (I'm not a psychiatrist but I'd become one and charge a lot of money!!)X

 

[Safia]

I have just started and my family are trying to mess everything up. They say diets dont work just eat less. Whenever i go over they always cook the wrong things knowing that cant and wont eat them. In the last visit home i succumbed to the temptation but next visit i will take all my sw friendly food and not rely on them xx

 

[MancBird]

Sad but true Safia, some people just don't get what we are trying to do at all...! Its not a diet, its a way of life! I never tell people I'm on a diet, I just say this is what I eat now, I've changed my eating habits because I want to be healthier. Some people will always see it as a diet though, more fool them.

You stick to your guns and keep going with SW, they will eat their words when we're at target xxxx

 

[aliben]

I am sure my Mum offers me rubbish food to make herself feel better about her bad habits. It is like emotion and food have always gone together. If you're sad - eat - if you are celebrating - eat - etc etc. I haven't told anyone in my family I am on Slimmers World, as I can't stand the false encouragement. So I just politely decline cakes etc saying I have just eaten, and mumble I am trying to be a bit more healthy at mealtimes. I have always been the 'fat' one in the family - I am sure it just makes the rest of them feel better about themselves seeing me, so they go on and on at me. Time for it all to end, and by this time next year I will be a new person, and leave all the hang up psychological games for them to play. My friends are the ones I listen to, who have always accepted me regardless of size. And my best friend was the one who asked my to join slimming world with her and started the best journey I can be on, even though she only had a few pounds to lose, I know she wanted to help me. I have had nothing but great support from friends, so will take family comments with a pinch of salt (syn free)!

 

[MancBird]

I am sure my Mum offers me rubbish food to make herself feel better about her bad habits. It is like emotion and food have always gone together. If you're sad - eat - if you are celebrating - eat - etc etc. I haven't told anyone in my family I am on Slimmers World, as I can't stand the false encouragement. So I just politely decline cakes etc saying I have just eaten, and mumble I am trying to be a bit more healthy at mealtimes. I have always been the 'fat' one in the family - I am sure it just makes the rest of them feel better about themselves seeing me, so they go on and on at me. Time for it all to end, and by this time next year I will be a new person, and leave all the hang up psychological games for them to play. My friends are the ones I listen to, who have always accepted me regardless of size. And my best friend was the one who asked my to join slimming world with her and started the best journey I can be on, even though she only had a few pounds to lose, I know she wanted to help me. I have had nothing but great support from friends, so will take family comments with a pinch of salt (syn free)!

Great post xxxxx

 

[Safia]

I agree sw is more a way of healthy eating then a diet. I have tried cambridge diet and xenical and found them both very restrictive and i used to go to sleep with a rumbling stomach. Sw is really good and simple and the whole family can do it. I think thats why my family feel threatned with sw because im really positive with it whereas with other diets i wasnt. Weigh in 2nite and dont know how much damage a week with my parents has done

 

[funcurls]

I have just started and my family are trying to mess everything up. They say diets dont work just eat less. Whenever i go over they always cook the wrong things knowing that cant and wont eat them. In the last visit home i succumbed to the temptation but next visit i will take all my sw friendly food and not rely on them xx

Give them time to adjust! Ignore the saboteurs, stick with it and when the family start really taking notice and seeing how much you're eating and enjoying your food then they'll change their attitude (we hope!! LOL!!) Well done hun and enjoy the plan and all the benefits it brings you!!XXX

 

[Safia]

I'm changing my way of eating for my two daughters as the older one who is 2 wants everything that mummy eats so if i eat junk she wants it too and i cant say no and so now when i eat healthy she eats healthy too xx

 

[funcurls]

I'm changing my way of eating for my two daughters as the older one who is 2 wants everything that mummy eats so if i eat junk she wants it too and i cant say no and so now when i eat healthy she eats healthy too xx

Good for you!! You're doing your girls the biggest favour!!X

 

[AJB]

I'm changing my way of eating for my two daughters as the older one who is 2 wants everything that mummy eats so if i eat junk she wants it too and i cant say no and so now when i eat healthy she eats healthy too xx

That's fantastic - I can't think of a better inspiration for you my brother's fiance is very healthy and I love the way she feeds my nephew veg, fruit and yoghurt as snacks - he's nearly 2 and I don't think he's ever had chocolate or ice cream my brother has type 2 diabetes and she has decided there is no way he is following in his father's footsteps!!

 

[Safia]

Thats the reason i want my daughters to be healthy because on my side of the family there is a long history of diabetes, heart disease and strokes. Fortunately i don't suffer with any of these yet and dont want to either hence y im in sw xx

 

[alwyn]

On the topic of children and healthy weights, I have heard more and more recently that it isn't so bad for kids to have the odd treat here and there, just not every day or all the time.

It's because their developing brain NEEDS fat to grow and for them to become healthy adults. Kids should never be fed "fat free" anything.

 

[Safia]

My dds still get their treats and have full fat milk but as i have stopped eating junk food they dont constantly get it as before sw i was just eating junk all day long and they would be eating it with me xx

 

[JAM21]

Hi all,

I read this thread earlier in the week and last night, had reason to add to it! I lost another 1lb at WI last night taking me down into the 9st range for the first time in over 30 years or so....rang Mom to say how please I was and the response was...."now that's enough....you don't need to loose any more" !! Bless her - I targeting another stone at least!