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Anyone more self conscious of appearance after losing a bit o' weight?

Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by coughdrops, 29 March 2014 Social URL.

  1. coughdrops

    coughdrops Silver Member

    Saturday musing!

    So, a pic of me popped up on FB today, from a family occasion. It's at a crap angle, I am sitting on a squashy couch, and all I can see is my lardy thighs and muffin top (pretty big muffin at that). I can't say anything to my relation, cos there are others in it, and I'll just sound silly. And I realise that other people don't see the same flaws that I see myself, that they probably just see happy family pic.

    But I am gutted. To me the pic shows what I have still to lose, not the 2 stone I've already lost. I never normally get upset by pics, I won't like them or think they're unflattering, but I don't get upset as such. Today I want to cry.

    It got me thinking, there are loads of worse pictures of me, when I am much bigger. So, why is this one so bad? I think it's cos I've put so much effort in to dressing nicely, and I remember thinking that I didn't look too bad that day, I've lost a couple of dress sizes, and then I see that I haven't done as well as I think.

    Did anyone else find that they felt more self-conscious after losing some weight than before they even started?

    (I'll get over it, I'm just in a huff for now)
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  3. lickthelid

    lickthelid Lives here....

    Some days yes and some no. Some days all I can see is what is left to go and others I am happy with what I have already achieved. I think at any point during (or before or after -so always) we are entitled to times where we are still not happy. Everyone has their flaws that probably only they can see. That only they notice. Another time you may see a picture that makes you smile. I still avoid the camera tbh. I'm not sure ill ever change THAT mind set!!
  4. tamkat

    tamkat Full Member

    I totally get where you are coming from & it sucks :( I hated what I looked like 2 stone heavier but last saturday I went out & looked in the mirror & still hated what I saw :( After losing 2 stone I thought id look bit better tbh! Oh well just need to keep plugging away at it & hopefully it will come! This last weight gain has really knocked my confidence I think x
  5. coughdrops

    coughdrops Silver Member

    Thanks for the replies, if anything it's making me more determined, so I suppose it's good that I saw it?

    searching for silver lining!

    Hopefully 3rd stone will look better
  6. tamkat

    tamkat Full Member

    Im really hoping the 3rd stone will make a difference!! The last time I lost weight everyone noticed & commented & asked questions etc.. which got to me a bit as I felt embarrassed however this time only 1 person has noticed so starting to think im imagining it all lol I actually think Ive lost weight a lot differently this time though,it normally comes off my face,tummy first whereas this time its coming off from godknows where! x
  7. coughdrops

    coughdrops Silver Member

    A couple of people have noticed I am losing, and I can see it myself, but I'm still a fatso!

    If I get to 13 stone, that'll be the lightest I've been in years... can't actually remember last time. So I am bound to feel thinner then.
  8. Berryred

    Berryred Gold Member

    yes! I don't see it on myself, but yesterday I put on a new pair of jeans (same size though???, but not stretched to pieces I guess!) and a lovely knit top I got for christmas and hid away! thought woah I can see a difference!

    Uploading photos today as my dd is always taking them and though meh!
  9. rootsfran

    rootsfran Full Member

    I know it is hard but the fat around your organs is said to be the first to go, I did not see a difference in dress sizes until 2.5 stone had gone, think of all the fat that must have been inside, and also how much healthier you are now, sometimes although we are doing it to make us look better we lose sight of the fact that we need to do this for health reasons not just looks. Camera s can take dreadful unflattering shots even of skinny minnies as well :)
  10. ladybird23

    ladybird23 Full Member

    I've only lost just over a stone so I know I'm not really going to see any difference yet - but no idea where it's gone from - I think I must be losing weight on my toes as I just don't see or feel where there's any difference.
  11. Revy

    Revy Full Member

    I sometimes feel self conscious as my clothes are getting more baggy, I'm inbetween sizes at the moment and the size below is still too tight to wear. I don't have many photos before I started, wish I took some before pics but in one I did get caught in I'm sitting on a little stool and I looked awful.
  12. slimminglizard

    slimminglizard Full Member

    I am now a stone down. Only one of my friends has noticed any change and my husband hasn't made one comment :( I think I must be losing from the inside as well! I have found that clothes fit better, but am not physically very different. I always lose first off my face and shoulders collarbone. But as we all in jumpers and jackets, no one can see it !'
  13. tamkat

    tamkat Full Member

    Thats true slimminglizard about the clothing,Im glad that ive got a bit longer until I bare my arms though as the weight never seems to go from there! Ive only had one comment from my husband & that was that my calves looked slimmer lol to be honest though ive lost weight so many times I think maybe he hasn't got faith that I will stick at it or its because I see him everyday so he cant really notice much difference yet.Didnt really think about losing fat from organs & on the inside though that's an interesting thought.Im def not so huffy puffy & sweaty now ,I know its not hot yet but I sweat even in the winter & that makes me very self conscious x
  14. sareypoop

    sareypoop Full Member

    Yes definitely! I'm almost 2 stone down too. I went out Friday night and wore a dress I've only worn once before. I took pictures before I went out as I didn't think I looked too bad and I thought I could use this to compare my progress. Well someone else took pictures whilst I was out and I thought how huge I looked, my arms look like shot putters arms and my face is really round when I smile. However if I think about it, I could have been 2st heavier sat there and looked even bigger on the pictures.
  15. coughdrops

    coughdrops Silver Member

    it must be a 2 stone thing and we all have nice slim livers and kidneys...
  16. Littleslimmingbee

    Littleslimmingbee Gold Member

    Coughdrops .. just wanted to give you a big hug! .. I can totally sympathise on a load of different levels. The first time I lost all my weight, I remember getting to around the 1st/2st loss mark, and having a HUGE dent in my self confidence. In hindsight I believe it was because previous to addressing my weight issue I cacooned myself in a bubble in which I (probably pretended mostly) that I did not care about my weight, that I was happy. I ignored it, Blissfully unaware. Once you start loosing it, especially if you have a fair amount to loose I guess- You have to address it, You are aware of it. You know what the scales say that week, and You KNOW that you are not happy with the dress size you are wearing. Even though you are working so hard, and you are just in the midst of your journey.. right there in that moment, you are uncomfortable. I found myself refusing to take my jacket off at dinners, and crying at myself in the mirror. And my boyfriend/mother/sister would say 'But you've lost loads! Your doing so well!!' but I remember thinking.. Yes, WE know that. But those strangers don't. They just think i'm fat!!

    Sometimes our minds are not always our friends. But know this. You are doing awesome. Like, seriously.. amazing! And you are going to get to whatever goal you are aiming for. And this photo will not matter to you. ... It is better to dislike yourself in a photo than not be in it at all. Trust me on this one. I don't have nearly enough photos of me and my baby, because I was embaressed and hated my body to much. There are some lovely photos of my family. And i'm not in alot of them. And i just wish I was. . Some of those family member's aren't here anymore. . and when that's the case, not liking how you look in a photo seem's a bit insignificant!

    On another note. It is your body. And facebook is crap. And if you don't want a photo of yourself on there stand up and say. I know I have. Someone else may not understand. . infact I recently asked my sister to remove photos from christmas .. she thought I was silly. I'd rather her think I'm silly that worry over it being on the web for all to see. That happy family photo will still exsist, but it really doesn't *need* to be on facebook. *I loathe social media in this respect!*

    Anyway, that was a bit of an epic reply.. but I just wanted you to know, that I understand.. and that you are doing great. xx
  17. Autumn500

    Autumn500 Silver Member

    I definitely feel mor self conscious now than I used to. I used to weigh 14st 7 and had never dieted, and it was once I started dieting that I became way more aware of my body, which is normal I guess., because you are looking for changes and regress etc. I didn't feel self conscious before I dieted, I didn't love my body but it didn't really enter my mind that I was unhappy with it or anything. I lost weight and got to 9st 9 and was half a stone for target and whilst I wasn't as self conscious as before, I still wasn't happy. Then I put on 2stone last year and am crazily self conscious now, because hardly anything fits and I just don't suit the extra weight at all. I've nearly lost a stone of it but cause I've seen my body thinner than this I can't even enjoy the weightloss because I still hate how I look.

    So short answer would be, getting near target made me less self conscious, but gaining and then losing some again has increased the self consciousness

    The joys of weight loss journeys! No one has commented on my loss this time round, but it think I can probably get away with gaining or losing a stone without other people noticing.
  18. Princess_Stevie

    Princess_Stevie Gold Member

    YES!! I am so self concious now that I have lost weight.

    I am so careful about what I wear, not wanting to have my arms / chest / legs on show. Whereas before, I wouldn't have been bothered.

    I look in the mirror and all I see is what is left to lose - although people are telling me I look great and don't need to lose any more.

    I often even think that I look "worse" now. Probably because my lumps and bumps are more obvious now that I've shifted some weight, my tummy looks huge!! It's a bit of a catch 22 really. The more weight I lose, the more self concious I become.

    Glad I'm not the only one that thinks this way. As I was beginning to worry!!
  19. coughdrops

    coughdrops Silver Member

    Thanks everyone x

    Ended up being sick most of Sat night and yesterday, so only getting to reply now. Good to know we're not alone, but such a shame to hear that other people feel the same way.

    Either way, I am less cranky about it now... I reckon my mood on Sat morning had a lot to do with the migraine that landed that night.
  20. CJ1992

    CJ1992 New Member

    I know exactly how this feels! i went swimming for the first time since i've lost my stone and i felt even worse than when i did before i lost the weight! :cry: Then i went out with some friends and they were posted online, i was mortified. I was sat there thinking, if that's what i look like now, i must have looked even worse before. And then the thought of having so much further to go before i stop looking like a potato!

    So you're not alone so please don't worry, as other days i see myself and think that i'm doing okay and see the light at the tunnel :) xx

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