ARRRG! Woman at work full of excuses.

Discussion in 'Slimming World' started by Chicaloca, 21 April 2011 Social URL.

  1. Chicaloca

    Chicaloca Silver Member

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    Bloody people!


    There is a woman at work who keeps coming over to my desk and banging on and on about diets. She says she is allergic to EVERYTHING and states she can only eat turkey and green beans. She honestly thinks that’s all she eats. She then goes on and on about how she can't loose weight, blah blah, even though she says she has already lost 7 stone!


    I just want to scream at her, as I see what she eats ENORMOUS bowls of corn flakes with milk and sugar in the morning, snickers, opal fruits and treats throughout the day, huge salads with GALLONS of olive oil on them, coffee with 2 sugars in each cup.

    She asked what diet Im on and I explained that Im not it’s just healthy eating and that all things in moderation.

    GAH! Im overweight I know, but I also know what I’ve eaten to get myself in this way and what I need to stop to stop being like this.

    It shouldn’t bother me, but this kind of denial makes a mockery out of all the people that have successfully lost weight, out of me for even trying.

    In the end I said that she must be some kind of medical miracle for not being able to loose weight and walked away.

    Sorry just needed to vent.
     
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  3. ladyantionette

    ladyantionette Full Member

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    Omg its like my life...

    Theres a girl in my office constantly "dieting" she then goes home and eats kentucy and comes in the next day vowing never again.

    I tried to get her onto slimming world and she makes such excuses (hence I stopped trying to help)

    Then went on about how much I was eating.."Like a horse" her words were!

    If you want to loose weight - get on and do it, we all have our slips agreed. If you want to eat chocolate, sweets etc dont go on about diets!
     
  4. Wegle

    Wegle Full Member

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    This really winds me up. There are several people at my group like this. They come every week and one week lose a pound then put 2 on next week. And this repeats over and over. When our C asks them what happened it's always "Well I was going to have this but then friends came over and we went and had a curry. I'm going to stick to it this week." We then have to give them a clap of encouragement. I understand that every now and again people will have gains or unexpected nights out etc but with these people its every week! There are people in my group that are really inspirational and it's these people that get glossed over with a quick "Well done you've lost this week" and then we have to spend half an hour listening to the excuse makers. I want to listen to how the losers have done it, what keeps them going etc. I got a bit wound up with one lady this week who said her friends had taken her out for a curry. I asked her if her friends knew she was on SW because if they did it was insensitive for them to make her go out. She wasn't sure if they knew or not! I just wish people would take it seriously, if you're not going to then don't stay afterwards and take up all the time with your excuses! ARRRRGGGHHHH!

    Sorry for my rant there! It's just something that has been getting on my wick.
     
  5. sweet83

    sweet83 Full Member

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    Couldn't agree more Wegle, there are people at our group that i just want to give a shake. They are only kidding themselves as its so obvious that they are just messing around with the diet.

    I've always been a sort of all or nothing person with regards to diets. In a sense we should really feel sorry for them instead of letting them get on our nerves. Doing what they are doing they wont achieve their goals xx
     
  6. Chicaloca

    Chicaloca Silver Member

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    I stopped going to my group for that very reason. One woman 'only' had 11lbs to loose. She is tiny, and been going for nearly a year. She never looses, always slagging of SW for not working. One day I confronted her and she admitted she doesnt follow any of the plans, has what she likes. Doesnt even know what a Hex a or b is. She took up so much of the class being moany and negative, like most of the people there I dont go anymore. I do miss the one lady who lost every week, she is such an inspiration.

    Le sigh ;)
     
  7. zeke

    zeke Gold Member

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    It drives me mad too when people make up all these bizarre excuses. I know exactly why I am obese but it does seem to be a mystery to some people.

    Someone even told me yesterday I probably wasn't meant to be small :rolleyes:. Well I felt fab when I was a sz 10 and into skiing, mountaineering, kayaking...much better than a sz 18 sitting on my arse, drinking wine by the bottle and scoffing family size bags of sweets (not now I hasten to add!).

    I am a bit of a straight-talker :eek: so I do call people on their 'claims'.
     
  8. Chicaloca

    Chicaloca Silver Member

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    Gah this happens to me all the time too!

    "Ooo youll never be slim" or "best you should be is a size 16" or "youve always been a big girl"

    THATS BECAUSE IM OBESE AND FAT!

    I am currently 17stone and a size 18, when I hit goal (amen!) I hope to be 6 stone lighter thanks all the same :cry:
     
  9. Rayven

    Rayven Addicted to Minimins!

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    Never one to get on my high horse, but how about giving these people a break. They're overweight, they're in denial and can't/won't stick to a diet for one reason or another. Maybe they're compulsive eaters, maybe they have serious problems with food.
    I understand your frustration at them banging on about diets and then stuffing their face, but how would you feel if someone was saying these kinds of things about you! I'm sure people have said similar things about me in the past without understanding my serious problems with food & to be quite honest with you these kinds of attitudes hurt people who can't get a grip of their relationship with food.
     
  10. Emmaline

    Emmaline Hippety Hop!

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    Oooh! Just have to join in there .. rings soo many bells it's doing my head in!..lol!

    Someone I know is exactly the same - not mentioning who as have a sneaking suspicion that she is on this forum but not letting me know...:D

    Will constantly say she is having "a naughty" as she puts it and then in the next breath wonder why she is not losing weight..Even admits from time to time that her eating habits are not really very good but if challenged about it will go on the defensive and swear to being very astute about her eating regime... No winning with her so don't bother any more but it does make me feel like screaming sometimes...:sigh:
     
  11. Chicaloca

    Chicaloca Silver Member

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    Rayven, no Im sorry I cant 'give her a break'. Her attitude takes the p**s out of people who are trying. She approaches me ALL THE TIME to harp on and on. She also critises my eating habits non stop.

    She may well have issues with food, but admitting them is the first step.
     
  12. Rayven

    Rayven Addicted to Minimins!

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    I totally agree - but how many anorexics are there, starving themselves....bulimics binging and making themselves sick, or compulsive eaters standing at the fridge stuffing their faces until they feel sick who all can't admit they have a problem & who kid themselves into thinking they're ok. Would you be as critical of them?
    My point is that you don't know whether this woman has deep seated issues with food or not - and from her behaviour i'd probably say she has.
     
  13. Chicaloca

    Chicaloca Silver Member

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    Oh purleeease, Im having a moan not trying to crucify the woman. I just find it very irritating and instead of loosing my rag I came on here to vent. I AM NOT THE BAD guy, no one is. Please don't attack me, Im really upset by your comment. If I cant share infuriations here with commen minded people, where can I?

    Thanks.
     
  14. ladyantionette

    ladyantionette Full Member

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    Im sorry but aswell as chicaloca I just havent the time for those sort of people.

    I am a recovered (as much as possible) anorexic sufferer, it took alot of hard work to get to the place I am now but I didnt constantly go on about it. Its hard to do SW at times and not get sucked into my negative self harm behaviour regarding food but I am.
    I should have more than most patience for people that always say im going on a diet and sit an munch a mars bar..But I honestly dont. An eating disorder and lazy people with no will power are different.

    The woman in question could indeed having an eating disorder as with all addictions its only you that can make the change. Get motivated, stop moaning, dont make others feel the way you do!

    Stop talking about healthy eating just do it.

    (By the way im not aiming this at anyone, everyone has valid points but wanted to give an ex-eating disorder opinion on this)
     
  15. kingleds

    kingleds Gold Member

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    I'm gonna stick up for Rayvern here - These are the people who do not need judgement - its the last thing they need in alot of cases as it seriously affects thier self esteen. I often listen to people in group saying how they have struggled week after week and I initially used to think 'get a grip' etc, but I am now beginning to understand there are 3 types of SWorlders. Those who have just eaten too much and not exercised enough. Those with what is essentially an eating disorder. Those who have had an eating disorder and have now recovered somewhat. I am firmly in group 1 so when my consultant talks about eating 4 snickers bars and hiding the wrappers so her husband doesn't see them -I think she's mental - but there are alot of knowing nods and agreements within my group when she talks like this - like more than 1/2 the room.

    They aren't hurting you - they are hurting themselves with their behaviour, and as long as they aren't hurting you, whats the problem?. I always remind myself that I am lucky enough to not suffer with the mental issues around weight loss/gain and that they need the support at group far more than I do.
     
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  16. Rayven

    Rayven Addicted to Minimins!

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    I never said you were trying to 'crucify the woman' & I'm most certainly not attacking you, but if you're allowed to voice how you feel about what this woman has said then i should be allowed to say what i think about what you've said (only fair) I'm really very sorry you have been upset in any way by my comment but your post upset me. Lets just imagine for one moment that this woman is a member of this site, doesn't post but comes on to read the posts (as a lot of people do), how exactly do you think she'd feel reading your post?
    Your comment of
    quite upset me to be honest. Because as of six weeks ago 'I' was one of those people who'd bang on about this & that diet, stuff myself & then complain that i 'can't' lose weight....i've had every eating disorder going over the last 15 years & have only just admitted that I've had a problem. But people making comments behind my back saying that 'no wonder she can't lose weight' etc etc would have been soul destroying for me.
    I'm not attacking you (or anyone), i'm just trying to make you see a different point of view. If it were me & I knew you felt/thought this way about my eating patterns it would have just made my eating patterns worse. What she's doing doesn't make a mockery out of anything.
    I'm afraid if being a common minded person means having a go at other peoples eating habits, whether they're stuffing their face, starving themselves, on a VLCD or just struggling with food in general then i'm afraid i'm not one of them.
    We'll have to agree to disagree.
     
  17. Chicaloca

    Chicaloca Silver Member

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    I'm afraid if being a common minded person means having a go at other peoples eating habits, whether they're stuffing their face, starving themselves, on a VLCD or just struggling with food in general then i'm afraid i'm not one of them.
    We'll have to agree to disagree.


    But I havnt commented on anyone else but this one person I work with. Where have I ever 'had a go at' eating disorders, other eating plans or diets? No mention form me re anorexia, bulemia or anything of the like.

    You are making it all too personal.

    Ive been a member here for months and never, ever, had someone attack me like this. Ive never even seen it before. Its not nice at all, and Im sure not nice for anyone having to read it.

    My original post was one of genuine frustrations and the ignorance of others. I can only apologise that my honest vent offended you. What you dont know is the situation and history of the situation I desscribed. Really is how woman mocks me, picks on me and infuriates me due to MY eating habits and tries to belittle them by counter agruing her 'issues'.

    And by like minded people I meant ones that are trying to lose weight, who are trying to make concious decisons, and most importantly ones who are on SW.

    Starlight can you please lock this thread to stop an arguement as I cant see another logical solution.

    Thanks x
     
    Last edited: 21 April 2011
  18. Rayven

    Rayven Addicted to Minimins!

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    I really don't feel i've attacked you & I'm sincerely sorry you feel that i have - I've not been nasty about you personally. I can understand your frustration at someone mocking your eating habits, i can understand your need to vent when someone constantly tells you what you should and shouldn't be eating. What i don't understand is how you can say this woman makes a mockery of your own or anyone elses attempts at dieting by her own issues with food. Thats all.
    I'm sorry if i've upset you. Maybe i'll keep my opinions and comments to myself in future.
     
  19. Rayven

    Rayven Addicted to Minimins!

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    And at least one person agreed with what i was trying to put across.
    And once again sorry for upsetting you.
     
  20. kingleds

    kingleds Gold Member

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    I'm sorry - but everyone needs to take a chill pill here. The post Rayven initially made was not directed at anyone in particular as far as i could see - more at the general lack sympathy for people with an eating disorder. She did not attack anyone personally. She merely stated her opinion that perhaps people should be more understanding. To be lambasted for having an opinion that differs from yours is uncalled for and completely against the whole friendly and open debate element of this forum. Pleasr can we all just calm down a bit and take a deep breath??
     
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